After Death Comes New Life
by Bugsbunnyaloha
Summary: When the last dying request of a Seal brother falls on Steve's shoulders, he's led back home to Hawaii in a quest to fulfill his promise, but the turbulent relationship with his father puts the duty at risk, until they're forced to work together to aid one person who will end up changing both of their lives.
1. Chapter 1

Part One

Chapter One

Steve leaned forward bracing his hand on the shower wall, letting the warm water wash over him. He stared at the drain at his feet as the clear liquid turned brown from the dirt with traces of red from Stuart's blood. He closed his eyes unable to watch the gruesome site, questioning his skills and actions over the past seven hours.

"Lieutenant McGarrett," he heard his Commanding Officer shout out from the door to the barrack showers.

"Sir?" he responded obediently but didn't bother turning, knowing the man was not in his line of sight.

"Debriefing in my tent in ten minutes."

"Yes, Sir," he responded again but with less obedience. He didn't want the meeting. He just wanted to stand there for as long as it took to hopefully wash away the memories of the day. He swallowed hard and squeezed his eyes shut; trying to ward off the look on Stuart's face and the last words his friend had ever spoken. They were directed to him and not the other three that huddled close by, offering their support but knowing there was really nothing they could do. Stuart was going to die right there in Steve's arms.

He waited for as long as he could before slamming his hand against the nozzle and shutting off the water, but his position remained the same as the water dripped off his body while he stared at the floor.

"Hey," he heard a familiar voice behind him and turned, catching the towel before it hit him in the chest.

"We have a debriefing in about five minutes, get dressed."

"I know," he replied to Mackey, the other squad leader that had been on patrol with him when their teams had been ambushed.

He turned to leave when he stopped and spoke over his shoulder to Steve. "Just so you know," he added meaningfully, "I would have done the same thing."

Steve didn't respond, not sure if that were true or not. He wiped his face off and let the rest dry naturally as he wrapped the towel around his waist and made his way back to his room.

…

The temperature, even at 10:30 at night was still uncomfortably warm, but the tension he felt in the tent made it seem like a five hundred degree oven, and he was the one that was going to get roasted, assured a demotion was in line. He should have kept his team together and not separated. '_Arrogance_,' he thought regretfully. '_You were too confident and it cost Stuart his life.'_

"Sir!" Mackey said as he rose to his feet, standing perfectly erect with his hand on his temple, saluting his Commanding Officer as he entered the tent. Steve was right next to him holding the same military stance.

"At ease gentlemen," Commander Allen instructed as he stopped at a table and poured three generous shots of bourbon from an unmarked decanter into three paper cups. He picked up his and the other two with his thumb and index finger. He walked over and extended them out to Steve and Mackey. It wasn't an offer but an order and they both accepted without any hesitation or thankful response.

He held up his cup, looking back and forth between his two squad leaders as he spoke, "To Chief Petty Officer Stuart Riley. His bravery and dedication was exemplified up to the very end. He will be missed, but never forgotten." He raised his cup higher, "To Stuart."

"To Stuart," they both replied and all three drank the strong liquid, but not one made a reaction over the harsh taste.

Steve could feel it slide down his parched throat and hit his stomach. A wave of nausea swept over him, but it wasn't from the bourbon, it was from the toast, wishing it were Stuart standing there toasting him instead.

"Sit down gentlemen," Allen ordered as he went behind his desk that was nothing more than a table with a two-drawer filing cabinet on either side. His chair was a fold up, the same that Steve and Mackey were siting on in front of him.

He spoke to both men but his main focus was on Steve.

"It's a bad day when we lose a man. However," he quickly pointed out, "neither one of you could have foreseen the ambush you walked in to. The area was tagged as a non-military zone after the sweep last month. Losing Stuart was as tragic as they come, but I also need to commend you on a job well done getting the others out alive. The odds were against you but you pulled through with commendable results."

"Thank you, Sir," Mackey replied, as Steve remained silent. He didn't want, nor did he feel he was warranted an approval on his efforts. He had lost a man by a bad decision that he had made.

"Steve," Allen said with a heavy sigh. "I saw the body cams. You made a quick decision while under heavy fire. That's what the United States Government trained you to do. Sometimes those decisions don't go the way that we anticipate, but in the heat of the moment we expect you to make the most comprehensive ones necessary, and you did. I commend you on your bravery for not only leading the path to safety but also clearing it for your men during the ordeal. You gave an order and they followed you without hesitation. That is the sign of a true leader. Sometimes your victorious but sometimes there are expenses that cannot be helped or predicted. This is one of those times."

Steve's face was expressionless as he sat there and listened, but not one word of it alleviated the fact that Stuart was dead and it was he who had given the order for him to fall back. "Yes, Sir. Thank you Sir," was his standard reply but neither man in the room with him believed he felt exonerated from his own guilt. They had both been in his position before and knew very well what demons were currently tag teaming him. Time was going to be his only friend, and getting him back out in the field as soon as possible was the Navy's cure.

….

Steve sat up on the edge of his cot and reached over for the Nike water bottle that sat on the floor next to him. He bent his head forward, emptying it over the back of his neck.

"Fucking heat," he mumbled, but it wasn't so much the temperature that had caused his lack of sleep.

The final words from Stuart were the culprit that kept him awake. They weren't words of fear or regret that a man who knows he's dying proclaims or confesses. His last words were a service that he not only asked of Steve once before, but also demanded a reply now that it would be carried out, knowing if Steve promised it would be done then he could die in peace, knowing that it would be.

"Shit," he whispered. The despair in his voice spoke of the magnitude of the dying man's wish. How was he supposed to fulfill that request? He was half a world away from the place that he needed to be and even if it were possible to obtain, he hadn't the faintest clue of how he would accomplish it. He couldn't just barge into a person's life and become their guardian.

'_Watch over my little sister.'_

Steve lay back on the cot as he spun those words over and over in his head seeing the plea in Stuart's eyes, knowing how important it was that someone has her back now that he would be gone.

He knew their family story only because Stuart was not only his subordinate, but he was a friend. Steve had moved up through the ranks quickly in his military career and Stuart was following in his footsteps only three years behind. They not only respected each other immensely, they shared the same hometown, which only strengthened the bond. Being tucked away in the desert thousands of miles away from any normal way of life that either knew resulted in many hours of down time being spent tossing the football, or playing a game of baseball with the other men, or just hanging out and drinking an occasional beer when available, reminiscing about home.

On a couple of occasions when the liquor was flowing freely they talked more openly about life back in Hawaii. It was like talking face to face with a buddy on a Saturday night at the local pub in downtown Waikiki.

On one particular night Stuart crossed over to the dark side, sharing details of a childhood that made Steve feel like he grew up in Disneyland, despite his own dysfunctional youth. In the end they made a drunken promise to one another that they would watch over each other's little sister if the other couldn't. It was a promise made in haste to Steve, actually commenting that Mary was not one that needed watching over, nor would she cater to such an outlandish plot, but Stuart on the other hand was not only grateful for the pact, but was relying heavily upon it if the worse came to be.

The request was taken seriously by Stuart and forgotten by Steve once the beer ran out and the hangover wore off, never spoken of again until just moments before Stuart's death, a little over a week before.

Steve tried to write off Stuart's dying request as something said to him under duress, but the more he digested it the more he began to realize it wasn't something he could walk away from.

He tried to find a comfortable position on the cot as he lay there sweating, wearing nothing more than his skivvy's. He finally rolled and over sat up again, cussing under his breath.

"Damn it Stuart," he muttered quietly, knowing how thin the walls were in his barracks. It wasn't spoken in anger over the request but wishing now he had more details of girl that he'd become the devoted keeper of. All he did know from conversations was that she was three years younger than Stuart and was basically alone in the world now without him. She was currently attending her first year at the University of Hawaii, and living in the dorms. He couldn't be there when she'd be getting the devastating news of her brother's death, feeling sorry for the young girl that he could scarcely visualize, having seen her photo only a couple of times on Stuart's nightstand, and in it she was maybe fifteen years old.

He couldn't be there for her now, but could let her know of his presence and his willingness to help her if the time ever came to be that she needed someone in Stuart's absence. It dawned on him then that perhaps she wouldn't even want his help.

He had to decide and make a commitment then and there how far he would go to fulfill the duty he had promised. He'd never backed away from a challenge, no matter how big. He had a feeling though that this one was going to be his most challenging responsibility yet.

It was unpredictable and he had no details, only a name, 'Nikki'.

He grabbed his laptop and sat back on the cot with his back against the wall, computer on his lap and began to sketch out the draft of an email to an current undetermined address of who he was, what Stuart was to him and what now this unexpected young girl was to him. He'd see what kind of response he got, which would lead him in the direction he would go from there.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Two weeks had gone by and Steve was a little shocked that he'd received no response from the email that he had sent to Stuart's little sister, Nikki.

He had obtained her email address from his CO for Stuart's next of kin.

He felt he had been straightforward with her and also kindhearted, re-reading the note several times over before sending it. Still, the unanswered email was a bit unsettling so he printed it out as well and mailed it to her in c/o the University Dorms, assured she would get the second attempt. If that failed as well, then his last bit of chivalry to fulfill the duty would be to look her up on his next furlough, which was in two months. He had planned on going to Thailand to relax but changed his mind, feeling the obligation weighing heavy on his shoulders. It had been well over a year since he'd seen his father as well, deciding to kill two birds with one trip so to speak.

Despite losing Stuart, life had gone back to a somewhat normal routine for him. As normal as it could get considering he was still in the middle of the desert in Afghanistan and doing patrols that were similar to what had gotten Stuart killed. He was more cautious now though, taking an extra second to consider an order before giving it to his men. This was noticed by all, especially his men, which led to gossip in the barracks of his ability to guide them into a dangerous situation and then the fear of him freezing up when it came time to direct them. That could be more dangerous than an ambush and so was losing the respect of his men, which unbeknownst to him was brewing at the moment.

He stepped inside his Commanders tent and stood fully erect with his feet slightly parted and his hands clasped together behind his back, waiting obediently for him to arrive after being summoned only minutes before.

He assumed it was going to be another meeting informing him of another patrol or perhaps even better would be an assignment that would hopefully take him away from the current area that he desperately wanted out of.

He glanced over at the table where the whiskey container sat that he had partaken of the night of Stuart's death. A dread washed over him as he swallowed down the dryness in his throat. He would give his right arm if he could go back to that night and do it all over again.

He felt a trickle of sweat slide down the side of his face as he recalled the moment he sent Stuart to his death.

They came under heavy fire from above, trapped between two mud brick buildings. If the enemy had used mortars instead of guns, they all would have been dead. The vests they were wearing saved a couple of his guys. One took a hit on his foot but wouldn't feel it until the battle was over.

The six of them scattered, taking shelter in doorways that gave them brief yet unstable safety from the firing.

Steve spoke into the radio attached to his vest, alerting the other Seal team of their position, assured they had heard the gunfire and were already headed in that direction, warning them of a potentially similar attack.

'_Those fuckers,_' he cursed the shooters, glancing up at the roof, trying to get a mental picture and layout of what they were up against. His adrenaline was pumping but his first reaction was anger not fear. Who in the hell were they to think they could rain fire down on United States Navy Seals, he thought boldly. He and his men were going to let them know just who the fuck they were dealing with.

For just a split second he considered staying put and waiting for backup, but his arrogance and training put that to rest almost instantaneously. If they did have mortars they were sitting ducks.

He used hand signals to give out orders to the men across the way as they attempted to enter the building but were unable to penetrate the doors that were barricaded from the other side.

He turned to Stuart who was next to him.

"We're going to take the lead. The shooters can't get over the edge of the roof to hit ground level without us taking them out, so stay low and stay behind me."

"Yes, Sir," Stuart replied obediently.

Steve motioned to his men that they were on the move; counting down with his fingers as they got in position the best they could to return fire as a form of cover for them.

All hell broke lose as pieces of mud and brick scattered along the alleyway from the bullets that littered the edge of the roof from the return fire.

Steve and Stuart both huddled the wall as they made their way down the alley.

His plan was simple; get to the end where he could get a long range visual on the rooftop and he and Stuart could cover fire for his men as they made the same route. Then they would be in prime position to use the grenades and rocket launcher Brooks had on his back. They could annihilate the rooftops as well as the inhabitants with two shots.

A bead of sweat trickled down Steve's face and hit the toe of his combat boots with a loud tap. He was burning up over the gruesome memory of looking over his shoulder and seeing Stuart crouching against the wall as he tried to keep up with him despite the bullet that had penetrated his neck just a millimeter higher than the edge of his protective vest.

Blood poured through Stuart's fingers as he tried to cover the wound. His eyes bulged, knowing the full extent of his injury but he never made a sound to alert Steve, knowing any kind of hesitation before they reached their mark could mean death for the both of them.

Steve whirled around and grabbed him under the armpits as he began to collapse, dragging him as the gunfire from the rooftop began again. Bullets ricocheted off the wall dangerously close to them but he kept moving, regardless of the threat.

He found a safe spot around a corner and rolled Stuart over on his back. His hands still clenched the wound and his eyes closed yet he was fully conscious.

"It's all right, Stuart," Steve said, his voice calm but his adrenalin was pumping at a high velocity. "Hold on Buddy, I'll get you out of here."

He leaned over him with his machine gun and littered the rooftop on the far side, returning fire that would now allow his men that were trapped on the same side as he and Stuart to make their way down the similar path.

Once they arrived, they saw the same carnage, stopping only briefly to give Stuart their verbal support before they began to assemble the rocket launcher as Steve took on the task of tending his wound. They all knew what needed to be done, but the task took on a new meaning now that one of their brothers was in grave danger.

He worked quickly, using what he could from the first aid box he carried in his backpack and the brief training he'd been given. Stopping the bleeding was the first priority.

His knees felt weak and a cold shiver ran down his sweaty back as he stood perfectly still in the tent, second-guessing his orders for the hundredth time. He should have stayed put and waited for backup. He should have waited, but he didn't. He led Stuart down that alley to his death the same as if he had pushed him out in the middle of the gunfire.

"My sister." He heard Stuart's voice in his head as clear as if he were standing next to him then. "My little sister, Steve," his voice shook, trying to get the words out, knowing his time was brief but needed these last ones to be heard and his wish fulfilled so he could die in peace. "She'll be…all alone. Watch over…" he coughed as his mouth filled with blood, "please, watch over her," he gasped and coughed again, but it was only a gurgle sound. His eyes focused on the man who held him, needing the acknowledgment of his dying wish.

Steve nodded his head in response to the request knowing there was no more need to tell him to hang on, it would only be a matter of seconds now.

"Prom…ise me," Stuart trembled, his unwavering stare alerting Steve of the magnitude of the demand.

"I promise Stuart. I'll watch over her. I promise." He felt Stuart's body relax and removed his hand from the pressure over the wound on his neck and took a hold of his hand instead, gripping it tightly "It's ok, Stuart. I got it. I got it." It made him think of Mary, his own little sister. She had her father to look after her but he could feel Stuart's panic because at one time in his life, he had been the one to watch over Mary when his father was absent. He was only sixteen but felt the responsibility nonetheless.

He saw the tension in Stuart's face return, knowing this was it.

"Stuart, Stuart!" Steve panted, holding his hand tighter, but the return grip loosened as his eyes closed halfway. They all knew he was gone.

Steve felt but didn't acknowledge the hands that touched his back as his men all gathered around him, mourning the lost of one of their brothers.

"Lieutenant."

Steve's body jerked slightly, coming out of the vivid memory as his CO entered the tent.

"Sir!" His body stiffened as he saluted his commanding officer.

"Lieutenant McGarrett," another deep voice behind him said as he entered the tent.

Steve turned and quickly stiffened once again as he faced and then saluted his CO's commanding officer. "Captain Meyer, Sir!"

He responded giving him a very solid return salute and not the ordinarily half ass gesture that he displayed the twenty or so throughout the day.

"At ease, Lieutenant."

Steve's shoulders relaxed, yet he stood perfectly erect; his insides rumbled fearing the worst once again from this unexpected visit from Captain Meyer. He was assured now more than ever that he was going to be demoted or at least stripped from his squad leader position.

Captain Meyer stepped forward, holding in his hand a small blue box. "You have served your country well Lieutenant. The leaders of this great nation appreciate your dedication, sacrifice and hard work. Congratulations son." He opened the box displaying the item inside.

Steve glanced down at it as his mouth came open in shock and then glanced up at the Captain, "Sir?"

He took out the medal and handed the box to Commander Allen who displayed a wide grin.

"You've been promoted to Lieutenant Commander, Steve," Captain Meyer replied, pinning the new officer emblem on the pocket of his fatigues right next to the previous one. "It was an easy decision. You show excellent leadership qualities." He stepped back and saluted him again. "Congratulations Lieutenant Commander Steven J. McGarrett."

Steve saluted him back, "Thank you, Sir," he shook his hand but the promotion was bitter sweet. He didn't think he deserved it after the ordeal with Stuart.

"Well deserved, Steve," Commander Allen said, stepping forward and shaking his hand as well.

"Thank you, Sir."

"I have a chopper waiting for me," Meyer explained, "so I apologize for the quick exit." He acknowledged both men with a salute and final handshake before departing the tent.

Steve looked down at the new emblem displayed on his chest, wanting to feel proud over the promotion, but didn't. He felt disappointed, knowing his first instinct should have been the eagerness of letting his closest allies know the good news, but that joy eluded him as well.

"Steve," Commander Allen said, seeing the conflict on him and knowing exactly where it came from. "You need to let Stuart's death go. You can't carry that around with you. It was tragic, yes, but it wasn't your fault."

He stood silent for a moment, knowing they were just textbook words and he wasn't about to argue with his CO, "Yes, Sir, I know."

"No you don't," he replied sternly. "If you did, then I wouldn't be standing here trying to convince you of it, and I wouldn't be giving you two weeks furlough to get your head straight over it," his voice stressing his slight irritation. "You need to get your shit together because if you can't let this go then your career as a Lieutenant Commander is going to be the shortest in Navy history."

He glanced over at him, confused over that, "Sir?"

"You are seriously lacking in your leadership role. You're second-guessing yourself and it's affecting your duties. I can't have that. That will get men killed, and their blood will be on my hands because I knew better. So I'm giving you time to think about what you want to do."

The thought of leaving the Navy had never crossed his mind. He was sure he would be a 'career man'. But he was suddenly at a crossroad; torn between the life he loved and had worked so hard for and the fear of losing it because he wasn't sure he could go through something like this again. His CO was right; he needed to get his shit together and it wasn't going to happen here.

"I'm sorry for letting you down, Sir."

"Goddamnit, Steve," he scolded him. "You're one of the best soldiers, if not the best that I've ever seen! It's not about letting me down; it's about letting yourself down." He toned down his voice, "Go home, see your family, get a taste of civilian life again, or go someplace else, I don't care, but when you come back I need to see that soldier again, otherwise we're going to have to make some tough decisions."

"Yes, Sir," he replied obediently but his voice was far from the normal confident tone that he usually represented.

His CO shook his head. "You're dismissed. I'll see you in two weeks and we'll talk again."

Steve straightened and saluted him. "Yes, Sir, thank you Sir." He turned to leave and stopped, glancing just slightly over his shoulder, "Sir, can I ask you a personal question please."

"What is it Commander?"

"Has this ever…have you ever been faced with this type of situation before?"

"Yes," he said knowing all too well what Steve was going through. "More than once. Keep that in mind."

"Yes, Sir, thank you, Sir," he replied as he left.

He stepped out of the tent and was met with a blast of hot air from the desert climate. The last fifteen minutes had his head spinning. He'd been promoted to Lieutenant Commander, a goal he had set for himself years before and had accomplished in record time, but in the same instance he'd also been reprimanded and was threatened with losing all that he'd worked so hard for. That threat alone should have knocked some sense into him, but it didn't. It did however panic him, wondering if perhaps this life he'd carved out for himself wasn't where he belonged at all.

He looked around him at the hustle and bustle of a well-run unit as men went about their duties. A helicopter took off some two hundred yards away and a caravan of Humvee vehicles exited through the security gates headed out for routine patrols. There was a chance none of them would come back alive he thought somberly.

"Shit!" he murmured running his hand down his sweaty face. That was the thought pattern he needed to break free from. It was dangerous and his CO was right, he needed to let Stuart's death go if he wanted to move on. But he was also right that it was never going to happen here.

He needed to go home. Maybe fulfilling Stuart's request would help with the closure, he thought hopeful; otherwise he feared he'd be lost on where to go from here.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Steve landed at Hickam Air Force Base in Honolulu less than twenty-four hours after his meeting with Commander Allen.

He was tired and in the need of a comfortable bed.

The cargo plane he'd hitched a ride on accommodated vehicles not people. The cots that were supplied were for the working crew, not a Naval Officer hitchhiker. He could have raised a stink with the officer in command on board if he were that type of guy, but he wasn't, so he slept the best he could on the floor, using his duffel bag as a pillow.

He took a cab home, forgoing the phone call to alert his father of his arrival, wanting to surprise him instead, but deep down inside he was more fearful of not hearing pleasure in his Dad's voice over the visit. Their relationship wasn't always the most cordial, but one thing he did know was that the red house with the white picket fence by the ocean would always be home, no matter what.

The cab pulled up the driveway as a broad smile spread across his face. He was home, not realizing until that second just how glad he was about that.

It had been well over a year, close to two since he'd been there and he began to actually look forward to the comfort and convenience of it.

He paid the driver and got out, walking up to the waist high front gate, staring at his childhood home that sometimes seemed surreal to him. He had good memories there, lot's of them, but whenever he came home from a long bout of being away he couldn't help but recall the tragic day he'd come home from school to face the frightening news of living the rest of his life without his mother, or the equally terrifying day that he and his little sister Mary were driven to the airport and put on a plane to LA to live with his Aunt.

He'd struggled over the years to forgive his father for that horrible day, but never found that inner peace required to forgive and forget. He was the only parent he had left and hating him only made him feel worse, so he decided to bury it and try to have a civil relationship with him instead, but the growing tension between them sometimes was unbearable.

They were amicable to each other and if anyone else saw them together they would never notice the giant elephant in the room that was still constantly visible to the both of them, even though they both desperately tried to ignore it.

He came up to the front door and set down his duffel bag, going to the side of the house and removing a small piece of the white siding to reveal a hidden key that had been kept there since he was a boy so no one would ever be locked out.

He unlocked the door and obediently returned the key as he had been instructed to the day his father had shown him where it was. He always followed the rules and did everything his father had told him to.

Despite his obedience, he still sent him away he thought bitterly, with a twitch to his left eye as he entered the house.

Once inside the irritation seemed to vanish as the familiar scent of home and security hit him, so did the lingering smell of bacon that his dad must have had for breakfast. He'd only eaten a couple of granola bars since leaving the base and the tantalizing aroma made his stomach growl. He dropped the bag and went straight for the kitchen.

Ten minutes later he pushed the plate away from in front of him and downed the last of his glass of milk. He leaned back in the kitchen chair and stretched his arms over his head. The overly stuffed ham and turkey sandwich with an equally excessive amount of cheese and mayo had done the trick. Now he was full and exhausted as he let out a long, drawn out yawn.

He forwent moving his bag up to the spare room and instead lay down on the soft, brown leather couch that looked just too conveniently close and inviting.

He was sound asleep almost immediately.

…

John McGarrett turned the key in the front door and noticed right away that it was unlocked. It startled him at first, trying to remember if he had locked it that morning or not. As he cautiously came inside, he saw right away why it was unlocked.

A broad smile came across his lips and his heart leapt at the sight of his son lying on the couch sound asleep. A very, very pleasant surprise.

He carefully shut the door and went all the way in the closet by the front door to remove his gun and badge instead of setting them on the hall table, not wanting to disturb Steve, assuming he must have been exhausted from his trip home, knowing more than likely it was from some place halfway around the world.

He stood over him and then took a seat on the coffee table across from the couch, still not wanting to wake him but he did want to get a good look at his boy. It had been far too long in his opinion since their last meeting, but understood the circumstances for him being away so long, hoping it wasn't on purpose.

He looked good he thought, pleased over that. No visible scars or injuries that would cause this unexpected visit. That relieved him. He didn't dwell too much on the reason for him being there, but instead counted his blessings for the visit.

He stared at the peaceful and relaxed expression on his son's face as he slept.

'_He's a good-looking kid,_' he thought. '_He got that from his mother_,' he chuckled softly.

He looked sturdier as well since the last time he'd seen him. His body looked toned and muscular, knowing his physical strength must be a force to be reckoned with.

His son, the Navy Seal. He smiled proudly over that, loving every chance he got to brag about Steve's credentials. He'd done well for himself and as a father he couldn't have been more proud of him.

He resisted the urge to reach out and touch him, perhaps with a fatherly brush of his hand over his son's hair and a gentle pat on the back of his head, like he used to do when Steve was a young boy and had done something that deserved recognition. He certainly deserved it now, but the physical touch beyond an awkward greeting hug was not a part of their relationship any longer. Not that Steve had out grown it; it was caused by the years of personal detachment of father and son that started the day he had sent him away. It damaged the connection, neither one taking the initiative to restore the bond as the years passed, leaving them with what they had now; a simple politeness between two men that was worse than the detachment. He hated it, but he couldn't blame Steve either, he was just as much to blame as his son, if not more.

At least he had him home for now. He was happy for that, knowing for the time being he was safe and sound. He still loved and worried about him the same as he had since the day he was born, that would never change no matter what happened between them. He was his son, then, now, and forever.

...

Steve opened his eyes and moaned as he stretched out on the sofa. He felt a hell of a lot better after getting some shuteye. He glanced at his watch to see how much longer it would be until his dad got home when he heard the rattling of pans in the kitchen.

By the smell of dinner and the time on his watch, he knew he was already home, wondering why he hadn't woken him up? Maybe it wasn't going to be a good surprise after all, he thought awkwardly. Maybe he should have called first and given him a heads up.

He got up and came around the corner and saw his dad standing at the stove flipping two burgers in the pan. He looked thinner since the last time he saw him, wondering if his health was ok, not that he would ever tell him, but he still worried about that and being so far away didn't help the matter either. His hair was slightly greyer as well but other than those two slight changes he looked as tall and sturdy as ever.

"Hey Dad," he said unexcitedly, not quite sure what kind of greeting he was going to get, suddenly feeling a little anxious about being there.

John turned and smiled, pulling the pan off the stove, "Hey sleepy head. I wasn't sure you were going to get up but I had a pretty good idea once you smelled food it would do the trick."

Steve smiled back as they made their way to each other. "Is that the burger with the onion soup like you used to make?"

"Sure is."

John took the lead as always and reached out first for the hug. Steve responded and it was over before either one of them had a chance to really feel anything from it.

"Glad you're home," John commented as he made his way back over to the stove. "Everything ok?"

"Everything's fine," he lied. "I just got a furlough and it's been a while since I've been home so I thought I'd better take advantage of it."

"How long you got?"

"Two weeks." He watched for his father's reaction over that which was shock. "Is that too long?"

The shocked reaction turned to a different type of shocked expression. "Of course not! This is your home for as long as you want to stay."

"Ok, thanks. You just looked a little shocked when I told you."

John laid the burgers on to two buns and went to the fridge. "You've never had a two week furlough before, at least not when you've come home."

Steve could almost feel the jab in his ribcage over that comment, hearing his father implying that he'd rather go someplace other than home. "I've never had this much time off before," he quickly assured him, shutting down what he thought was an accusation.

John heard the defensive tone and shot him a look, "So you understand my curiosity then." He picked up both plates with a bottle of ketchup tucked under his arm and handed Steve one of the burgers. "Get two beers from the fridge," he ordered as he passed him.

Steve didn't need to be reprimanded for the attitude, he saw it on his dad's annoyed face, rolling his eyes as he went to the fridge and took out two beers with one hand.

He took the seat across from John and twisted off the tops and set one of them in front of his father.

"So you got any plans while you're here?" he took a bite as he waited for the reply.

Steve poured some ketchup on his burger and set the other half of the bun on top and pushed it down, letting the onion juices from the greasy meat mix with the condiment, the same as he did since he was five. It was one of his favorite dishes his father cooked.

"I told a friend of mine I'd look in on his little sister that goes to U of H, other than that I just want to sleep, eat good and maybe do some surfing." He took a generous bite of the burger. "In other words, relax."

"Sounds like a good plan."

Steve shrugged, "So how you been? How's work?"

John wiped his mouth off with a napkin from the stack that was left continuously on the table. "Busy lately. I'm earning my paycheck."

"When are you going to retire?" Steve asked, not liking the idea of him chasing down criminals at his age.

"Retire?" John laughed, "What would I do all day?" he shook his head as he took another bite, talking with his mouth full. "I'd go out of my mind."

"You could travel," Steve suggested, "finish fixing up the Mercury. You could learn to golf. There's a lot to do."

John shrugged, "Travel alone? That wouldn't be much fun."

"Go with some of your buddies."

"They travel with their wives."

"Then get a wife," Steve huffed. "That would definitely be something fun to do."

John looked across the table at him narrowing his eyes in surprise over that, "A wife?"

"Sure, why not?"

John shook his head, "I don't think so."

"Why? I'm sure there are hundreds of eligible women out there who would love to hook up with you. You look good, Dad."

"Not going to happen."

"You're selling yourself short. You…"

"Steve!" he cut him off, "Enough. I was married to your mother and will stay that way."

"Mom's dead," he replied just a little too unemotionally.

That got another look that was a cross between hurt and anger, "She's still my wife. You don't understand so just let it go, all right?"

He didn't reply, never understanding his father's choice to be alone.

They ate in silence, letting that tiff settle before Steve decided to break the ice.

"Have you talked to Mary recently? How does she like San Diego?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact just a few days ago. She's doing well. She's in Costa Rica now."

Steve huffed, "What the hell is she doing down there?"

"Working at a resort. She got a job offer and took it. She loves it."

Steve shook his head as he wiped his mouth off. "Do you think she'll ever stay in one place and settle down?"

"Will you?" John replied.

"I'm in the Navy, that's a little different than flying from here to there by the seat of your pants."

"She's happy. She enjoys her life. I'm proud of her for being so carefree. She got that from her mother."

Steve felt a pang of jealously over that remark, wondering what or if he ever got anything from his mother, considering maybe he was adopted because he felt he was nothing like his dad either.

Mary wasn't being carefree in his mind, she was being reckless and it worried him the way she went from here to there. He wished she'd pick a place and stay put so he didn't have to keep track of her and worry so much. She drove him crazy that way.

"What about you, Son? How's Navy life treating you? Can you tell me where you came from or is that top secret?" he chuckled.

"You've probably never heard of it," Steve replied. "We've been running patrols in a small town called Hijan, near the Iraqi border."

"You're right, I haven't heard of it. How long have you been stationed there?"

"A couple of months." He thought of Stuart, wishing he could tell his father about the pain he was feeling inside, but that wasn't what McGarrett men talked about, it was far too personal and God forbid, too emotional.

But he could talk about simpler things that wouldn't break the emotional isolation streak they had going. "Guess what? I got promoted."

That got John's attention. "Really?! Congratulations!"

"Lieutenant Commander Steven J. McGarrett."

"Wow, Steve, that's great! Good for you, Son. You deserve it. You really do."

That got an equally pleasing grin from him, "Thanks, Dad. It was kind of a surprise. I wasn't expecting it."

John lifted his beer and held it out to him, "They know what they've got. You're a good leader. Congrats Son."

Steve lifted his beer and tapped it against is fathers. "It means a lot more responsibly which also means less time for me to get away."

"I understand. You won't be making it home as often. That disappoints me, but I understand."

He sounded sincere but Steve couldn't help but wonder if he really did care all that much, or if it was just something you say to be polite. "Yea well, I guess you take the good with the bad." He took his empty plate and stood up, reaching across the table for his father's as well. "Is the Mercury running at all? I mean enough that it's drivable until I can get a rental while I'm here?"

"It's running pretty damn good actually. I take it out on the weekends and so far so good, no issues at all. Just keep an eye on the temperature gage. It guzzles water."

"Ok. So you don't mind if I use it?"

"Of course not. It's just sitting there waiting to go for a cruise and be admired."

Steve laughed, "You make it sound like I should cruise the beaches and pick up chicks in it." He turned the water on and began washing the dinner plates.

"Just put a tie on the front door to alert me of any company."

Steve laughed even harder looking back over his shoulder at him from the sink. "Seriously! If I brought a girl home to sleep with up in my room you would kick my butt all over this house."

"That is true," John admitted, "I'm glad to know you still remember the rules of the house."

"That rule never applied to me. The last time I lived here I was sixteen. I was happy to get a girl to kiss me at that age let alone waste the energy of trying to get her up to my room."

"You were a good kid, Steve," John chuckled. "I never worried about you disobeying me. You're smart and you always did the right thing, you still do. I think that's what makes you such a good soldier and leader. People respond to that and will stand behind you because of it. How many lives have you saved because of that trait?"

He stopped washing and stared out the window at the endless ocean view. He didn't always do the right thing he thought somberly, if he did then Stuart would still be alive. "Stop making me out to be some kind of hero," he said abruptly, "because I'm not."

John cocked his head to the side, surprised over that statement that seemed to come out of nowhere. "You never take credit either," John argued.

Steve turned his head to the side with his back still to him, "Just stop Dad all right. You don't know what goes on behind the scenes. People make mistakes all the time and good men die because of it. You only see what's on TV and how it's glorified in the movies. You never hear of the fuck ups."

John saw as well as heard plain as day the anger and pain in his son's voice over that, sensing that this trip was not just out of the blue. They never talked about real stuff and felt this was a golden opportunity to maybe get an inside look at his son that he really barely new. "Do you want to talk about it, Steve?"

He picked up the dishtowel and wiped his hands off. "Talk about what?"

"That comment you just made, or the real reason why you're here?"

"Can't I just come home for a visit? Why does it have to be something complicated? I was just mouthing off."

"Ok," John said passively, "if you want to stick with that story, fine, but you know I'm a cop and have been for a long time and I know when someone is feeding me a line of BS. So just keep in mind that even though we don't see each other very often, I'm still your father and the one person in this world that you can count on."

Steve looked out the window and rolled his eyes over that statement, '_Like I could count on you when I was sixteen and you sent me away',_ he thought bitterly, wanting to say it out loud so badly but held his tongue. What was the point?

Instead he turned and walked toward the family room. "I'm fine, Dad. You're reading into something that doesn't exist. I just wanted to come home and relax. Can you just let me have that?" He picked up his oversized duffel bag by the cloth handles, "I'm going to unpack and go for swim before it gets dark."

John watched him go up the stairs, feeling that familiar distance between them that he feared would always exist. It was heartbreaking as a father to know his child was in pain and there was nothing he could do to relieve it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

Steve looked down at the piece of paper in his hand, reading the dorm room number for Nicole Riley, Stuart's little sister.

He glanced up at the building searching for the correct building number as two people came out the front glass doors.

"Hey," he said to the two boys. "Is this building three?"

"Yea," the taller of the two replied.

"Do you guys know Nicole Riley?"

They both shook their heads and then the shorter of the two got a quizzical look on his face. "Oh wait, you mean Nikki?" he nudged his buddy with his elbow. "He means Nikki. You know, the chic with blue hair."

"Oh yea."

The two boys looked at each other and grinned and then chuckled.

"Yea, we know Nikki."

Steve wasn't sure what they meant by the look between them but it didn't sit well with him. "Do you know if she's here right now or in class?"

"I haven't seen her for a while, have you?" he asked his buddy.

"Nope." They walked past Steve, "You might want to try the 808 On Queens Street. I heard she got a job there." They both started laughing over that as they walked away.

Steve turned and glared at them, wondering what in the hell they meant by that, and what '808' was?

He saw another boy come out of the dorm building while he texted on his phone. Steve caught up with the door before it closed and went inside. He took the stairs to the second level and walked down the hallway until he was in front of room 213, her room.

He didn't knock right away, still not sure what he was going to say to her. She had to know by now that Stuart was gone; at least he hoped she did, not wanting to have to break that news to her. He hoped she didn't ask details of his death, not sure he could tell that either. His guilt over it was still fresh and the wound far from healed, hoping that fulfilling Stuart's last wish would help with the process. He'd never been so nervous about a meeting before, wiping his hands on his jeans before finally knocking, deciding to just rip the Band-Aid off.

A young Hawaiian girl answered and he assumed it wasn't Nicole since Stuart wasn't Hawaiian, even though like he they had both been born and raised in Hawaii.

"Hi," he said to her. "Is Nicole here?"

She narrowed her eyes looking at him suspiciously; never having seen him around before, but then again Nikki always had strangers in and out of their dorm room she thought irritably. She peeked her head out and looked down the hall in both directions and then closed the door just slightly as if nervous over his presence. "No, she's not here. I haven't seen Nikki in about three weeks. If you see her, tell her to come get her shit. I want a new roommate.

Steve raised his eyebrows in surprise over that and then narrowed them in concern over it as well. "I'm a friend of her brothers. Do you have any idea where I can find her?"

"Club 808. If she owes you money don't bother coming here to collect," she huffed.

She went to close the door when he put his hand on it, hearing that similar wording from the two boys' wondering what in the hell it meant. "Hold on, what is Club 808? Or where is that?"

"I don't know," she snapped. "Somewhere over by Chinatown or something. But who knows. I've never been there."

"Do you know about her brother, Stuart?"

She shrugged, "I know he's in the Navy."

"He was killed in action just recently. He asked me before he died to look after Nicole, or umm, Nikki."

The girl's raw attitude quickly changed over that, "Oh, that's awful, I'm sorry."

"So you see, anything you can tell me to help me find her would be great. I don't know her so…do you think you can help me out? I'm Steve by the way."

She hesitated and then opened the door and let him in, but kept it wide open for her own well-being. He seemed genuine and she didn't feel threatened by him, but over the past few months she had learned not to trust anyone associated with Nikki. He didn't look anything like the others that had come around looking for her; on the contrary he was very fit and really cute too.

"I'm Lori."

"Thanks, Lori. I appreciate it."

He came inside the small room that consisted of two beds; two desks and two narrow cabinets that he assumed were closets. There was a long window that brought in a lot of natural light with a small fridge placed under it. Each side of the room mirrored the other. He'd never been inside a college dorm room before, considering it cozy but nice compared to some of the military dorms he'd lived in. It was even bigger than his Officer's quarters.

The bed on the right was made and well kept while the other bed was striped with a couple of boxes stacked on top of it.

"That's her stuff right there," she pointed.

"When was the last time you talked to her?"

"About three weeks ago."

"Aren't you worried about her? Did you let someone know that she's been missing?"

Lori rolled her eyes, "She's not missing. Not really." She let out a long breath and slumped down in the desk chair by the door. "And yes I do worry about her, and I tried to help her," she quickly defended, "but she didn't want it. She would just get really nasty and…" she shook her head. "So I stopped trying."

"Help her with what? Why did she need help? Is she in some kind of trouble?"

She stared at him for a second and then at the pile of Nikki's belongings on the bed. She missed her friend but didn't miss the changes in her that occurred over the past months. She looked back at Steve and hoped that maybe he could do something; he was after all the first person to ask about her and seemed genuinely concerned. She knew Nikki had no family accept for her brother, deciding to tell him all she could.

"She does a lot of drugs. It all started about six months or so ago."

It was worse than he thought; he sat down on her bed and rubbed his hands over his mouth. "Shit."

"Shit for sure," Lori agreed. "I mean, it all happened pretty quickly. She was a good student. We roomed together last year too and had fun. She got high here and there and I think she even did Cocaine once or twice. I never did," she quickly pointed out, "but I saw her at parties go in the rooms with people who did. But even then, it never interfered with school. It was always on the weekend, and then this year…I think over the summer she fell in with the wrong people because when she came back to school this year she was like a different person. She would be out all night and skip class. I would come home and she'd have like four or five people in here getting high. I think she started selling it too, because other students would come by and she all of a sudden started having more money."

"What's she taking?" Steve asked.

"I don't know, everything. I know she took pills to give her the energy to get to class because she was smoking stuff that kept her up all night."

"Crack maybe?" Steve asked, truly not sure what the hard drug of choice was nowadays, but when he was in high school here in Hawaii it was crack cocaine.

Lori's eyes filled with tears, "Maybe crack, but the last big fight we had was because I saw needle marks on her feet. I think she might be doing heroine." She reached over to a box of tissues and took one out. "I confronted her and she got really, really mad and told me to mind my own business and that she was tired of living with her mother because I was nagging her all the time." She wiped the moisture from her eyes, "I wasn't nagging her, I was just trying to make her stop and see what she was doing."

"You sound like you really tried," Steve added. "Do you know who these people are that she's hanging out with?"

"There's this one guy, he's a real asshole; his name is Jimmy. I don't know his last name. I walked in on them one night just before she left and I think he was getting physical with her. Like he had her against the wall and when I came in he backed off, but I could tell that Nikki was scared and all. I tried to ask her but she just got mad and I told her I didn't want him in our room anymore or I was going to report her to the house Mom." She sighed, "She got really mad."

"What's Club 808?"

Lori's shoulders slouched and she blushed slightly, "It's…" she turned her eyes away from his, embarrassed, "it's a strip club in Chinatown. I think she might be working there now."

What had he got himself in to, he thought miserably. This girl sounded like she was out of control. She's certainly not the sweet tempered person that Stuart always described, but then again he'd seen what drugs could do to someone and by the sound of her roommate, this did seem out of character for her. He felt his duty was shifting dramatically from just looking in on her to doing what Stuart would have done if he were here, help her to the best of his ability.

"Do you have a recent picture of her Lori," he asked, needing to pick her out if he visited that place.

She got up and went to her phone, "This was taken about four months ago." She held the phone up and it showed a pic of the two of them at what looked to be at a party. Nikki had blond hair and deep blue eyes. He could see the resemblance between she and Stuart almost instantly. She was a very pretty girl.

"She has light blue hair now. It looks stupid, but probably not to the people she hangs with. They're all pretty weird."

He gave her his phone number so she could send the pic and asked if it was ok if he could text her incase he had any more questions. Lori agreed, pleased that someone was going to try and help her too.

"I don't think she knows about her brother," she said sadly. "She loved him a lot, I know that. She used to talk about him all the time. She was so proud of the fact that he was a Navy Seal. It's sad that he died."

That hit him hard right in the chest. Suddenly this wasn't a burden he had taken on; it became a duty, a mission so to speak to save the little sister of the man he couldn't save.

...

Steve sat in the Mercury outside the Club 808 bar and called his father.

"Hey, Steve what's up?" his dad answered. "The car didn't break down did it?"

"No," he chuckled, "its fine. I have a work question for ya though."

"Ok, shoot."

"A you familiar with a strip club called Club 808?"

"Yes," he replied with a little hesitation in his voice. "Why? You don't frequent those places do you, Son?"

"No," Steve replied slightly irritated over that question. "Paying a girl to take her clothes off doesn't do anything for me."

"Ok, good," John said, pleased over that, or he would have wondered if he didn't know his son at all. "Why then do you want to know about that place?"

"Is there a lot of police activity there that has to do with drugs?"

John chuckled, "I'm sure a lot more than we know about, but yes there has been a couple of busts in the past, that I know about."

Steve blew out a long breath and ran his hand over his head. "Shit, I figured."

"Why are you asking?"

"This sister that I'm looking in on, I think she works there now and according to her roommate from college she's also strung out on maybe heroine."

"Jesus, Steve, what have you got yourself in to?"

"I know, but I just can't walk away."

John knew only slight details of the fallen friend and last request, knowing that if Steve promised something, then he would also deliver to the best of his ability. Letting people down was not in his character. "What are you going to do?"

"I don't have a plan yet, but talk to her if I can."

"I'll see what I can find out about recent activity there."

"Ok, thanks, that would be helpful. See if the name Jimmy, I don't know the last name, comes up on anything."

"You know I can't divulge certain details of case files?"

"I know, just whatever you can tell me would be helpful."

"All right then."

"Thanks, Dad. I'll see you tonight at home."

"Careful son, and good luck."

"Thanks." He hung up and looked out the windshield as a couple of construction worker type guys entered the establishment. He glanced down at the picture of the pretty girl and heard Stuart's voice in his head. '_Watch over my little sister_.'

He got out and slipped his phone in his back pocket, walking toward the entrance. The last thing he wanted to see was her dancing naked on a stage, hoping to God she wasn't. He felt a little nauseous just thinking about it.

The street the establishment was on he knew from being a native of the island, it was not the best area of town, not surprised that it had a strip club on it. He saw a couple of shady looking people huddling close together in the alley on the side of the building, not even having to guess what was going on there.

He came through the front door and was met by a Samoan that was about a hundred pounds heavier than Steve but the same height. The size of a man had never intimidated him; they just fell harder when he knocked them over.

"Five bucks," the man said to him.

Steve fished out his wallet and gave him the money and then held his other hand out for a stamp on the inside of his wrist, leaving an ink mark that read '808'.

"No touching. You got me?"

Steve looked annoyed as he slipped his wallet back in his pocket, "Yea, whatever. Is Nikki working today?" he asked him.

"Yes, no touching the wait staff either."

He ignored the last comment and went inside the rest of the way. He was hit with a foul smell of stale smoke mixed with beer and greasy food.

He scanned the place looking for anyone that resembled the picture of the young girl, but the only person he saw working the floor as a server was a tall, skinny, dark haired girl, topless with a G-string bikini bottom serving the construction guys a round of draft beers as one of them stared at her chest and the other gawked at the girl on the stage. She too had dark hair and by where he was standing neither one of the women even came close to being as pretty as Nikki was in the picture he had.

He took a seat away from the stage as the topless server came toward him, her face forming a grin that was supposed to resemble something sexy and mysterious but he didn't catch the subtlety of it, not caring anyway.

"Hi handsome," she greeted him, setting down a square white napkin on the table. "What can I get ya? Make my day and say a lap dance."

He did his best not to show on his face the distaste he had over that request, instead he forced a half decent smile, keeping an eye on her face and not the bare chest that was practically in his. "Maybe some other time, is Nikki working today?"

Her expression showed the disappointment over his request for her instead, "Yes, she's getting changed, but she doesn't do lap dances, she just serves."

He was relieved to hear that, but also knew it was only a matter of time, wondering if that was her decision or managements. "Could you send her over when she gets a second?"

She shrugged, "Sure, there's a ten dollar minimum beverage or food purchase though so what to do you want?"

"Just bring me a Kona then."

She turned on her three-inch spike heels and strolled off.

The music for the girl on stage was at half the level of what it probably was on a Friday or Saturday night, catering to lunch guests who were just in for a quick show and not the drunken party that took place on the weekends.

Steve sat back in his chair and looked at the picture of Nikki again. Her smile showed off perfect white teeth and her blond hair was full and draped over her shoulders with bangs that made her look even younger than the twenty-one years that she was. He couldn't believe how much she resembled Stuart, if he didn't know of the four-year gap in their ages he would have thought them fraternal twins. Her complexion was flawless and had a glowing tan that he contributed to the island lifestyle. She was after all twenty-one and beautiful, assured she spent many hours soaking up the Hawaiian sun.

He glanced up as the beer was placed down in front of him.

The girl who had taken the order was not however the one that delivered it.

"Hi," Nikki said to him with the same dreadfully fake sexy smile that the other girl had worn. He wondered if they practiced with each other to learn that.

"Hi, Nikki?"

"Uh huh," she said lazily, eyeing him suspiciously as she focused on the stranger, trying to regulate the high from the most recent dose only minutes before. She didn't recognize him wondering how he knew who she was. She hadn't established a cliental like the others had told her to work on. It could be a significant amount of cash if she could just get at least five that liked her exclusively, but she still had the jitters about dancing. The others told her it was easy when you took an extra hit and then went out. It made you feel beautiful and the men always made you feel sexy and wanted.

He glanced down at the picture of her again on his phone as the image disappeared when it shut off automatically, needing to make sure he was talking to the same person because the young girl standing in front of him hardly portrayed the one in the photo.

The first thing he noticed was that she wore too much makeup. Her beautiful blue eyes looked concealed and blood shot under the layers of eye shadow and liner that might have looked exotic on a six-foot model that had a professional do it, but on her it looked like she was trying to hard to fit in to this place. Her flowing blond hair was colored a light blue and ironed straight. It covered the bare chest, which he was grateful for. She looked at least ten to fifteen pounds thinner than in the photo. The girl standing in front of him looked nothing like Stuart.

"Sabrina said you asked for me," she said to him.

"Yea, I was wondering if there is a place we could talk privately. I'm…" he was about to tell her a friend of her brother's when she cut him off.

The word privately set off an alarm as she sensed the worst, assuming he wanted more than to talk. "Did Jimmy send you?" She got a bad feeling that he was sent there to either collect from her, or to coerce her in to paying off her debt in another way. Jimmy had suggested it several times and made it seem like it was a quick fix for her money troubles. All she had to do was sleep with one person and all would be square. Even though he continued to supply her with the drugs she knew eventually he'd demand more from her if she didn't pay him back, hoping this job would keep her from doing the unthinkable with a stranger and still give her enough to feed her habit that was becoming more and more demanding and expensive.

There was that name again, Steve thought. "No, I don't know any Jimmy," he replied. "My name is Steve, I'm a friend of your brother Stuart." He felt a little queasy having to tell her about her brother's death, especially here, reconsidering that. "What time do you get off work? Can we maybe meet up later and talk?"

"Stuart?!" she asked shocked, "How do you know about Stuart? Who are you?" She nervously glanced around the bar, assured that Jimmy was nearby and now using her brother as bait because there was no way in hell Stuart would know that she worked there. The last time she talked to him she glorified school, lying to him and to herself that her life was under control all the while it was actually on a downward spiral.

Her eyes narrowed back on Steve as she backed away from the table, "You need to leave right now or I'm calling Randy."

"Nikki," he said passively but adamantly as well, "we need to talk about Stuart. My name is Commander McGarrett." He pulled out his wallet and showed her his military ID card. "I was Stuart's CO." She looked at the ID and he watched her face turn from anger to shock to dread all in the span of a few seconds.

"What do you mean 'was' his CO?" she stared at him now feeling a horrible wave of fear mix with the high as she pieced together what might be the reason for this person to be there.

"What's happened? Where's Stuart? Why isn't he here himself?" her voice mirroring her fearful expression.

He suddenly realized his error in wording, giving away more than what he wanted to. He stood up and came around the table, "Not here,"

"Yes here!" she yelled. "Tell me what's going on? Is Stuart hurt? Is he ok?"

A few patrons turned hearing her raised voice as well as Randy, the big Samoan as he came around the corner from the front door.

Steve swallowed down the lump in his throat wishing he could be anywhere in the world rather than where he was standing at that second. But it was his mistake that had put him there so he had to man up and face what he had done.

"He was killed two weeks ago while we were on patrols. I'm so sorry, Nikki. I wrote you and emailed you, but you never…" he paused, seeing the shock overcome here, "so I came to find you."

She felt her head begin to swirl as the heroine coursing through her body took on a new face. She was catapulted back into reality that was all too real to deal with. She always knew that something like this could happen but never truly believed that it would. To her, Stuart was invincible. He was her rock; the one person that she knew would be there for her for the rest of her life. The only family she had, and now he was gone.

"No," she whispered hoarsely as she backed away from him. "Oh Stuart," she cried as tears began to fill her eyes and she swayed under the strain of the drug and her own shock and grief.

"Nikki," Steve said mournfully, reaching out for her. "Sit down."

The tray in her hand tipped over and fell on the ground as she continued to back up, running blindly in to a table and falling against it.

"Nikki," Steve said, putting a hand on her shoulder, his heart breaking over the despair that was overtaking her. "I want to help you any way that I can."

"Hey!" Randy said, stepping in and grabbing Steve's hand that was on Nikki's shoulder, "I said no touching asshole! Don't you listen?"

"Her brother just died," he growled, yanking his hand out of his grip. "Back off!"

Nikki turned and headed for the back of the bar where they changed clothes before shifts. Tears began to stream down her face as she covered her hands over her mouth, trying to hold back the sobs.

"Nikki what's wrong?" Sabrina asked as she chased after her. "Did that guy hurt you?" She looked back toward Steve and Randy as they both stared in Nikki's direction.

She ignored the plea from the other waitress and went straight for her locker. She needed a hit. The craving for it at that second was beyond any that she'd ever experienced before. Over the past two months she went from smoking it to streamlining, getting a better and longer high that way. She maintained the dosages at work, allowing herself the treat, but in smaller amounts so she was still able to function, but at this moment she wanted the whole bag so she could just disappear from the pain that was throbbing inside of her over the loss of her brother.

Steve went to follow her back into the room when Randy grabbed him by the arm again.

"You can't go back there! Employees only!"

"Get off me!" He spun around and shoved off of him, sending him flying into a group of tables.

The four construction workers who were regulars all stood up to come to the aid of Randy, who was back on his feet immediately, showing a fiery rage in his eyes.

Steve held his ground, calculating his next move and the one after that if the other men got involved, anticipating a brawl to break out at any second.

"Randy!" A voice bellowed from behind the bar, "Step back!"

Randy obeyed like a trained dog, but his cold stare remained on Steve.

Steve looked to the side toward the other men, keeping an eye on his blind spot when the man came around from behind the bar, walking toward them.

"Steve McGarrett," he announced, "That's you isn't it?"

Steve turned in that direction, looking at the man who seemed to know him, but he on the other hand had no idea who he was. "Yes," he replied giving him the once over and then looking at Randy again just to make sure all was actually cool.

"Don't you remember me?" The man held his arms out as if displaying himself. "Jimmy Ketchum, Puku Junior High dude."

Steve heard the name Jimmy as he looked closer at the man behind the goatee beard and tanned leathered skin. He looked ten years older than Steve, which somehow made the possibility that they were in the same class disbelieving to him, but it wasn't the appearance that he was mainly focused on, it was the name, wondering if this was the infamous Jimmy that he kept hearing about over and over.

"Damn, look at you bro," Jimmy chuckled. "You were about to go up against five guys and not even blink an eye about it. I heard you joined the service. They must have given you steel balls." He held his hand out, "Good to se you again. Welcome to my place," he smiled proudly as if Steve should be impressed, showing off yellowing teeth from years of smoking and drug use.

Steve didn't let down his guard right away but he did begin to see the boy he once knew years before in the weathered man in front of him. He reluctantly took the hand held out and shook it. "Hey, been a long time." He pointed toward the back where Nikki had fled. "I need to see Nikki. She just received some bad news and I want to make sure she's ok."

"Nikki huh," he said, putting both hands on his hips as he glanced in that direction. "I'll check on her and make sure she's ok. What kind of bad news?"

Steve didn't want to indulge anything to him other than what he already had. "About her family. I'm going to go back and talk to her."

Jimmy shook his head. He instantly felt disrespected by him; not liking his attitude or the way he was telling him what he was going to do in his place. "I can't let you do that." He leaned in to him, "The girls are back there getting ready to perform, so I don't want you getting a sneak peek at the goods," he chuckled, "Also, it might make the them uncomfortable having the clients in the back."

"I'm not a client," Steve quickly pointed out with a hint of distaste in his tone. "I'm a friend of hers."

Jimmy's smile faded, "Well this is my place and I say no. But like I said, I'll go check on her because I care about my girls. I take good care of them." He pointed to the table Steve had been sitting at. "Sit down and I'll be back in a minute."

Steve stared at him knowing he had no other choice, otherwise there was going to be a brawl for sure. "Ok. Will you tell her that I need to talk to her?"

"Sure thing, buddy," Jimmy replied, just a little too nicely in Steve's opinion.

He continued to stand as he watched him make his way to the door that Nikki had disappeared through.  
She sat in the corner of the bathroom with her hands trembling as she flicked the small lighter in her hand over and over trying to get it to light. She needed a quick high so used her pipe rather than the syringe to get it, ignoring the pleas from Sabrina to open up and let her in.

Jimmy came up behind her and gently shoved her out of the way, rapping on the bathroom door.

"Nikki," he said firmly, "open the door."

She startled hearing his voice, but went back to her task of flipping the lighter. "I'm…ok," she called out, her voice shaky, "just…just give me a minute."

Jimmy reached in his pocket and took out a set of keys. There wasn't a door in his place that he didn't have access to. He flipped through the ten or so and selected the one he knew was to the men and women's bathroom and slipped it in the lock.

"Go back to work," he said to Sabrina.

"I want to make sure she's ok," she replied nervously.

He gave her a stern look and she quivered slightly over it, backing up. "I said go back to work, and tell Jackie to get on the stage, Maya is almost done. I don't want an empty stage."

"Ok Jimmy," she responded submissively, giving the partially opened bathroom door one last glance before she left.

He came inside and saw her sitting on the floor with her purse contents spread out before her, shifting through them for another lighter as tears streamed down her face.

She glanced up at him and froze, "I'll be back out in just a minute Jimmy, I promise. I just…" she wiped her hand across her eyes and sniffed, "I just need a quick fix. My brother," she gulped for air, "he…he's dead."

She began to sob again.

He didn't see her and feel sympathy over the loss of her brother; he saw an opportunity.

"Hey," he squatted down in front of her, putting a hand on her shoulder, "its ok sweetheart." He lifted up her purse and began to put everything back inside. "Lets go to my office where its quiet and you can just relax and chill. Don't worry about the floor, Sabrina will cover for you."

She looked up at him through pools of tears, shocked over his kindness. "Thanks Jimmy."

He held the purse as he stood up, holding his hand down to her. "Come on, I'll make it better. I've got something that will take the edge off and then we can talk."

It was what she needed more than anything at the moment; a gentle hand and a good high, just never realizing both would come from him.

Nikki laid back on the couch in his office in a haze as Jimmy slid the needle out from the injection spot between her toes, never using the arm, track marks didn't look attractive to customers.

She felt her body surrender to the drug as she drifted away from her problems and the death of her brother.

Jimmy used his thumb to wipe away the fresh moisture on her cheeks, smiling over her obvious intoxicated high. He gave her at least a seventy dollar shot of the new stuff he'd got only days before, adding it to her bill that was becoming progressively out of reach for her to re-pay. He'd have her on her back in no time he thought promisingly. She could make him a grand a week, no problem.

"Does it feel good?" he asked her.

She nodded her head and looked up at him with dreamy eyes, her voice soft, "Yes, Jimmy."

"That's a good girl," he glided his hand over her hair and down over her shoulder and then over her bare breasts, letting his open palm skim over her nipples.

'_She's got great titts,'_ he thought to himself, admiring them often but never having the opportunity to touch them, until now.

She moaned softly over the tenderness that calmed her even more, too high to realize the touch was for his benefit and not hers.

He slid his hand down her stomach and over her mini skirt, caressing her tanned thighs, feeling himself getting hard. He glanced up at her face, seeing if she were objecting but her eyes were closed, she was in Never Never Land at the moment.

He could take her right now and she'd probably never even know it. He licked his lips and stood up, undoing his belt when there was a knock on his office door.

"Hey Jimmy," Randy yelled out, "this guy out here is getting antsy. He wants to see Nikki."

"Shit," he growled, forgetting about Steve as he fastened his buckle again. "Asshole."

Steve walked toward him as he came out the door labeled "Employees Only", closing it behind him.

"Where is she? Is she alright?"

Jimmy held his hands up, "She's ok. She doesn't want to come out."

Did she tell you what happened?"

"Her brother's dead. Of course she told me. My girls trust me."

He hated how he used the phrase, 'My girls', it made him sound like a pimp, but then again by the business he ran he wasn't so sure he wasn't one, hoping that Nikki hadn't crossed over to that life.

Steve gave up trying to see her at that moment but not giving up entirely. "I'm going to leave you my number. I need to talk to her about some arrangements. She was Stuart's next of kin. They're flying him home Tuesday."

"Sure thing," Jimmy said, snapping his fingers to get Sabrina's attention for a pen. He wrote out Steve's number on a cocktail napkin and stuck it in his jeans pocket. "I'll make sure she gets it." He held his hand out to him, "Good seeing you again. Bring your friends by, first rounds on me."

Steve forced a fake smile, which was obvious to all as he shook his hand, "Yea sure. Can you just make sure she gets home ok?"

"I will, "Sabrina announced, hearing from afar the conversation and now knowing the reason for Nikki's breakdown.

"Thanks," Steve said, glancing one more time toward the closed employee door before leaving.

He slid into the driver's seat of the Mercury across the street but didn't start the engine, instead he just sat and waited, feeling a little apprehensive about leaving her all together in that place, feeling it was an injustice to Stuart, but what was he supposed to do? She didn't know him from Jack. Did he really expect her to just leave with him? And what else would he have said to her if she did come out, 'I'm sorry I got the one family member left in your life killed?'

Still, he couldn't bring himself to leave.

He sat for close to two hours, hoping she'd come out and he could catch her then, but instead just before five o'clock he saw Sabrina come out, walking across the parking lot. She was alone and it didn't seem to him that she was fulfilling her promise to get Nikki home safe.

He got out and jogged across the street just as she was getting into a beat up old blue Toyota Celica.

"Hey," he said, getting her attention through the open car window.

She looked over, recognizing him as the guy from earlier and then quickly past him, making sure no one else was around from work, mainly Jimmy or one of his bouncers, slash thugs.

"Hi," she responded as he stood next to her car.

"I thought you were going to take Nikki home?"

"I was, but…" she paused, looking past him again. "Jimmy said he'd take her home."

Steve ran a hand down his face, not really liking that idea but not really sure why either. "Is she still inside?"

Sabrina nodded, knowing she was in Jimmy's office and also where he had been most of the afternoon as well. She could only imagine what was going on, knowing that he had been relentless in his pursuit to get her to become more involved with the job, meaning dancing, but she also knew as well that a pretty girl like Nikki would be ideal for his extra curricular job. She had tried to warn her of the situation when she started but Nikki assured her that would never happen, but Jimmy was sly and had ways of making it happen before they even knew they had agreed to it. She had a strong feeling that Nikki's drug habit was his way in with her.

"Yes, she's still inside, but…" she paused and looked beyond him once again.

"But what?" He sensed her uneasiness and glanced over his shoulder to see too if anyone was there. "This is between you and me," he said to her, "if she's in trouble I need to know. I promised her brother I'd watch out for her."

She sighed heavily; knowing she should just drive off, but felt compelled to tell him of the fate that she was assured Nikki was headed in to. Also, he seemed genuine and she knew he was military. Hawaii represented all four branches of the armed services; she could point servicemen out in a crowd. Most were stand up guys.

"She has a drug problem," Sabrina confessed, "and it's going to get her in trouble, lots of trouble. Trouble that she doesn't even know is lurking because she's too naïve."

"Is Jimmy the main culprit of that trouble," Steve asked in a steel toned voice.

"Yes." She started her car, knowing she'd already said too much. She didn't care so much about the job as she did her well-being. Talking behind Jimmy's back was not something you did without looking over your shoulder first, or in the future for retaliation that would come from one of his thugs.

"Wait," Steve said as she put the car in reverse, "what kind of trouble, specifically?"

Sabrina paused with her hand on the gearshift. She stared out the windshield and then looked over at him as he bent over with his arm resting on the roof of her car while he stared at her, waiting for her reply.

He could see the apprehension all over her. It didn't take a detective to tell him that she was scared of Jimmy. "She's twenty two years old," he said to her, "help me, so I can help her."

She glanced in her rearview mirror before she spoke. "He keeps feeding her habit, she's really hooked and when she can't pay the bill but still needs the fix, then…" she looked over at him with a look that asked if she really needed to go on.

"He finds other ways for her to pay," Steve finished, "with clients?"

"I've seen him do it before," Sabrina replied. "He has a whole other side business that probably makes as much as his bar and drug deals combined."

Steve backed up as she put the car in reverse. "Is he getting close to having that control over her?" he asked.

"Yes. If he hasn't already then it's just a matter of time. I gotta go." She rolled up the window as she backed up.

He walked back to the Mercury parked across the street trying to make a plan, but what in the hell was he supposed to do? She didn't even know him and vise versa. How was he going to help a complete stranger that more than likely didn't even know that she needed help?

He slid into the driver's seat and closed the door, looking across the way at the parking lot and waited. He couldn't bring himself to drive away. He had promised Stuart he would look after his little sister and that's exactly what he was going to do.

Nikki stood up with the help of Jimmy as he steadied her. She slid her skirt back down as he fastened his jeans.

She turned away from him still reeling over what had just happened between them, not sure when it had even started or how she had let it happen. Her head felt woozy as she came down from the last high, feeling that ach for another one as the reality over what had just happened and the other even worse nightmare that Stuart was dead. She had no one left in her life that she could call family, using that as an excuse to sleep with Jimmy. Maybe she was just feeling that moment of vulnerability and loneliness when it happened, not really remembering now. She was confused and dazed.

"Come here baby," Jimmy said holding a pipe out to her. "This will hold you until we get to my apartment. I've got some good stuff that will knock your shoes off. If you want it?" he asked, using it as a teaser to get her to come to his place, knowing full well she would if he dangled a treat out to her such as that. He was so close with this one. She was like putty in his hand; the death of her brother couldn't have come at a better time for him.

She followed him out the back door of the bar, surprised that it was dark out.

"What time is it?"

Jimmy put an arm over her shoulder, "Time to get high," he chuckled.

She smiled slightly and heard her name from across the way, looking over and seeing Steve coming toward them.

"Nikki," he said again. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

"We're headed home for the night," Jimmy replied, wondering what the hell he was doing there again, assuming he had been waiting for her.

"It'll just take a second," Steve responded directly to her, ignoring Jimmy all together. "It's about Stuart. We really need to talk."

That got her attention loud and clear. Her heart began to pound and she felt tears sting her eyes, wanting to run away from him but knew it was unavoidable. She couldn't remember his name but knew he was the one that had told her about Stuart earlier that day. He was Stuart's CO, she remembered that.

"Ok," she answered softly, moving away from Jimmy as he reached out and gently pulled her back, whispering in her ear.

"Don't take too long. I'm not going to wait all night."

She knew what he had for her and assured him she wouldn't. "I'll just be a minute."

Steve took a couple of steps back as she came towards him, wanting to get out of ear shot of Jimmy and talk with her privately. As she came closer he could see that she'd been crying. Her eyes were blood shot and the makeup smeared. The straight hair was tangled some and needed a comb. She looked a mess in his opinion, but when she stood before him he could clearly see that she was wasted as well.

"Are you ok," he asked her? That question could have been for two different subjects, one being her mental state and the other her emotional.

"I'm tired," she said, glancing over her shoulder at Jimmy who stood by his truck watching them.

"I can take you someplace and we could talk, get something to eat. I could take you home."

She shook her head, "No, that's ok. I'm going with Jimmy."

Steve glared over at him and then up at the sign on the building that was in bright yellow that read, Club 808, with the outline of a girl and the words nude dancing, in green lights.

"Did Stuart know that you dropped out of school?"

She looked up at him and scratched the back of her neck, feeling a prickly sensation that she wasn't sure was because of this subject or because her body was telling her it was time for another dose. Both were equally bothering to her.

"Yes," she lied. "He knew."

"Really?" Steve said, "Did he also know that you worked here? I bet not. I think he would have flown home and drug you out of here himself if he had."

She shot him a look of anger and hurt over that. "Who are you to talk to me that way? This is a good job!"

"Waiting tables topless and dancing nude, that's a good job compared to going to school and getting a degree?"

"Stop talking to me like you're my brother. You're not! Just tell me what you have to tell me about Stuart's…" she swallowed choking out the word, "death."

"He asked me just before he died to look out for you because he loved you. I promised him that I would. I want to help you, Nikki, anyway that I can. Anyway that you need me to."

"I don't need help," she snapped.

"Are you kidding me?" Steve huffed, "You're a mess. You're higher than a kite right now and working in a strip club, you're the poster child for someone that needs help. You're not doing your brother any justice by lying to me or living your life like this. He would be crushed if he saw you right now. He talked so highly of you and was so proud. Do you think he'd still feel that way if he saw you now?"

"Shut up!" she shouted, feeling a jab in her chest knowing for certain that Stuart would have killed her if he knew she was working here. It was only supposed to be temporary until she could pay off Jimmy and have enough to finish school, but truthfully, she'd been there for over a month now and was worse off than when she started, promising herself on a weekly basis that she'd cut back on the heroin, but that was always when she was high, all bets were off once that next craving came around.

Steve cooled his jets, letting his temper get the best of him. He was impatient when it came to people that were blind to their own weakness. He wanted to shake some sense into her the same as he was assured Stuart would have, or what he would have done if his little sister Mary, God forbid, were in the same situation. He would have carried her out of there over his shoulder and locked her up until she'd listen to reason. But this wasn't Mary and he couldn't just kidnap her even though it would have been for her own good.

"Hey," Jimmy shouted, "I'm taking off."

"Wait!" Nikki yelled, back, fearing he really would, leaving her alone for the night with no fix. She'd been through that before and it was horrendous, not wanting to do it again. "I'm coming."

"Don't go Nikki," Steve pleaded. "Come with me. I'll help you get back on track again. Whatever it takes, money, time, whatever."

She looked at him appalled, "I told you, I…"

"Don't you even care that Stuart is dead?" He confronted her with what he felt was his last bit of hope to make her come with him.

She reached out and slapped him across the face, shocking the both of them.

"Fuck you!" she screamed. "Stay away from me!"

His cheek throbbed, but it wasn't from the physical slap that stung so much as it was that he was failing Stuart's last request.

...

Steve sat at the kitchen table finishing off a plate of lasagna from leftovers in the fridge. He hadn't eaten all day and contemplated a second heaping but that would only leave a small amount left for his father then.

Instead he opted for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, something he hadn't enjoyed in years, considering it dessert.

He poured some grape jelly from the jar and slapped the top piece of bread on it, taking a generous bite.

"Mmm," he moaned over the delicacy that brought him back twenty years to when he was seven.

"I left you some lasagna in the fridge," his dad said behind him as he came in the kitchen.

Steve wiped his hand across his mouth and spoke with his mouth full. "I had some already. I didn't want to eat it all."

John went to the fridge and took out a gallon of milk and then reached up in the cupboard for a glass, filling it with the milk and handing it to Steve.

"You can't have peanut butter and jelly without milk."

Steve chuckled and took the glass. "Thanks." He took a long drink and then another bite of the sandwich.

"So, did you see the sister today?"

"Yes, she's got some serious issues and working in that dump isn't helping her situation."

"Drugs?"

"That among other things."

"That's too bad," he replied sincerely. "How old is she?"

"Twenty two."

John blew out a whistle, "Wow, that is young. But unfortunately I see it everyday, sometimes younger than that."

"She's hooked up with this guy, Jimmy Ketchum. I went to middle school with him. Do you remember him?"

John shook his head. "I don't remember him from when you were young, but I know the name. He's the owner of that bar you asked me to look in to."

"I know. He's pretty much a scumbag. From what I found out, he's feeding her drugs so he can manipulate her into prostitution outside the club."

John cleared his throat and sat back in his chair. "Did you witness any kind of illegal activity, Son? Or is this just speculation?"

"Just hearsay, but I believe it."

"Oh I'm not doubting you, or it, but if you witnessed something then you need to tell me." He neglected to inform him of the DA surveillance that had been going on for the past two weeks, not wanting Steve to impede the investigation, feeling he was protecting him as well as the investigation.

"I didn't see anything illegal. She was really high though on something when I told her that her brother had died."

"How did it turn out?"

"Not good. I offered her help," he huffed, recalling the slap, "but she declined."

"It's hard to help someone who doesn't want it or think that they don't need it."

"I'll find a way. I'm not giving up yet."

John heard determination in his voice, wondering where all the devotion to this young girl that he didn't even know was coming from. "He must have been a good friend, this Stuart. You seem hell bent on fulfilling his request. I don't want to sway you from doing the right thing and all, but if she doesn't recognize her downfall, then there's really nothing you can do until she hits rock bottom."

"If it was Mary, I'd go in there and drag her out and sit on her until she listened to reason."

"But it's not Mary. You have no ties to this girl. She could eventually slap a restraining order on you if you harass her."

"Harass her!" Steve chuckled irritably. "It sounds to me like you're trying to discourage me from doing the right thing."

"There are laws out there son that don't always work in the way that we want them too. You could end up being the victim here, not her. So I'm just telling you to be careful."

"So what would you have me do then Dad, just ignore the problem? God forbid should I get involved and try and help her. I'll tell you one thing, if the roles were reversed, Stuart would be doing exactly what I'm trying to do and go the distance to get it done. That's the thing about being a Seal; we don't give up, even if the odds are against us. You however wouldn't understand that."

"What's that supposed to mean?" John asked, feeling attacked for the second time since his son's return. "I'm a police officer, Steve. I know…"

"Never mind," Steve said, dumping what was left of the sandwich in the sink. "I'm not talking about your profession, Dad." The word Dad was emphasized in a way that made it crystal clear where his objective lied. His long time built up anger with his father and the frustration of the day was getting the better of him. He was dangerously close to saying something he would later regret.

John didn't need any further explanation; he knew exactly where Steve's anger was coming from. It was the reason there was distance between them to begin with, distance he himself had put between them and had allowed to grow over the years. He wouldn't apologize for what he had done, not now not ever. He did what he thought was right for his children and someday he was sure that Steve would understand. Mary did. She never spoke to him disrespectfully or held it against him. He was sure that someday Steve too would forgive him as well.

"I'm going to bed," Steve declared before he crossed the line of no return.

As he past by him John reached out and took ahold of his arm, "I did the best I could with you and Mary. I did what I thought was right."

Steve stood face to face with him, his voice as cool as steel. "Just because you thought it was right, doesn't mean that it was." He looked down at the hold on his arm and then back up at his father's pained expression.

John let go, seeing in Steve's eyes the years of pain and resentment, and for the first time the certainty hit him that his son was never going to forgive him for what he had done. Never.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

Nikki checked her reflection in the mirror one last time before going out on the floor. She'd be going on stage for the first time in ten minutes in her new role as a 'performer'.

It was what Jimmy called it rather than dancer, it made it sound more dignified than what it actually was. The word stripper was never used, that would just be degrading she thought disturbingly, but it was exactly what she'd be doing, stripping in front of men. Her first shift was a Friday night, the busiest. She wasn't so naïve to know that he was giving her the good shift so she would make the maximum amount of cash, proving him right that the money was exquisite compared to serving drinks.

She owed him too much to turn it down, feeling as if he had made her an offer she couldn't refuse. She really had no choice, feeling sick to her stomach that she had let herself get sucked into this trap. She had a strong feeling he knew what he was doing from the beginning, but she looked in the mirror and swore to herself up and down that she would only do it until he was paid off and there was no way in hell she would stoop to Polly or Trina's level and allow herself to go home with 'special' clients that visited the club as Jimmy's guest.

But as that thought crossed her mind she was also reminded of a time that she had swore to herself she would only serve beer and wouldn't step foot on the stage, and yet here she was.

She felt woozy and sick to her stomach over the image of going out there and stepping up on that platform. She had taken a generous hit only moments before but wasn't sure there was enough drugs in the world to get her through this pain free.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and turned seeing Jimmy standing there. He leaned in and kissed her on the cheek.

"You look beautiful, an absolute knock out. They are going to be feeding you so much cash you won't be able to hold on to it all."

She smiled uneasily at him, "I'm scared."

"I know baby, everyone is the first time, but you won't be once you get out there." He ran his hand down her long blond hair, "You'll be a natural. Men have always admired you, why not profit from that." He held his palm open for her, displaying a needle.

"I already took something."

"This will just take away the jitters."

"I owe you enough," she argued. "I want my bill to go down not up."

"It's on the house," he replied.

She took the needle, "Just let me have a second before I go out."

He kissed her again and smiled before walking away.

She didn't take the hit, assured she would need it for after. No matter how much he tried to sugar coat it, the fact still remained that once she stepped out on that stage, she was officially a stripper.

"Oh god," she moaned, "What have you got yourself into?"

She closed her eyes and for the first time the drug actually worked in her favor, displaying an image of Stuart and then Steve's words that had been torturing her for the past two days throbbed in her head, '_Stuart was so proud of you, do you think he still would be if he saw you now?_'

"Oh Stuart," she felt tears sting her eyes, still not having come to terms that he was actually gone. She concealed the reality with drugs not wanting to deal with it, it was just too painful, never letting herself reach that moment of clarity long enough to accept his fate.

She looked in the mirror again and through the fog of her high she saw his image standing behind her in the reflection. The physical apparition was so real she spun around, assured that he was there but saw nothing but empty space.

"Stuart!" she yelled out.

She looked back at the mirror hoping to see him again, but saw nothing except a bleak image of a frightened young girl with too much makeup on and dressed in a skimpy bikini.

"That's you," she whispered to the person. "He was right, Stuart would drag you out by your hair. You can't do this to him, or to yourself."

'_Run.'_ She heard a voice in her head that sounded so much like Stuart's. '_Run!'_ it shouted again as if speaking to her from the grave.

She listened.

She ran to her locker and grabbed her purse, throwing the contents into it just as she heard a loud commotion from the bar area, assured it was Jimmy who had the power to read her mind and was coming to get her. The panic set in and she frantically made a go for the back door, swinging it open only to be met by two police officers wearing bulletproof vests that had the words DEA printed on them.

"Put your hands up!" one shouted pushing her back inside and up against a wall. Her purse dropped to the floor and out spilled the needle that Jimmy had given her as well as a baggy of heroin he had fronted her the night before.

She had handcuffs on her and was being led out to a van before she even knew what hit her. The commotion was chaotic as the officers raided the bar from both front and back entrances. She saw Jimmy come out the front with his hands up just before they closed the door to the van she was in.

...

Steve drove off after watching the commotion unfold and Nikki being led to a van in handcuffs.

He had been sitting outside the nightclub for the second night, deciding that he would give it one last attempt to try and reason with her. He would try a new approach and be more patient and use Stuart's words and stories that he remembered him telling him and the others of his perfect little sister, hoping it might encourage her to listen to reason.

But now all of a sudden he had other problems to deal with. She had been arrested and his only hope for her now was that he had someone on the inside that could possibly help.

...

"What do you mean you knew it was going to happen?!" Steve bellowed, standing in the living room of his father's house. "And you didn't tell me?"

"Tell you what, Steve?" his father argued back, "That the club was under surveillance? And what if I had? You would have marched right in there and used that as a ploy to get her out, and in turn she would have warned the others. That's hindering an investigation. A federal investigation no less! That could mean my badge and your career in the Navy."

"What do you think, I'm an idiot?!" he shouted. "I know the law, Dad. I could have prevented her from getting arrested without it infringing on the investigation!"

"It doesn't matter now," John argued, "its done and she's being charged with possession."

Steve shook his head, "You need to get those charges dropped."

John halfheartedly laughed over that suggestion, "You obviously think I have more influence than I actually do, Son."

"You've been a cop for HPD for almost thirty years, don't tell me you can't get a lousy possession charge dropped on a twenty two year old girl with no priors."

"This might be the best thing for her," John declared, "Maybe she needs a wake up call."

"Ah that's right Dad," he said sarcastically, "tough love. Let's use your brilliant knowledge as a father and teach her a lesson. Maybe we'll just ship her off someplace and pretend that she doesn't exist."

"Knock it off, Steve!" John shouted. "This isn't about her anymore, this is about your anger with me!"

"You're goddamn right it is!" he yelled. "I've never asked you for a thing, ever! Not a goddamn thing! Not even an apology! And the one time I come to you for help and what do you do? You throw it right back in my face like you've been doing since I was sixteen years old! I didn't get where I am today because of you, Dad. I got there in spite of your shitty parenting skills!" He stood his ground, not caring anymore if he did say something he would regret. You were supposed to be able to count on your parents for help, but he'd never felt that. "So what's it going to be, Pop? Are you going to toss me aside again or help me out?"

John was beyond himself with anguish over the brutal confession of words that were being thrown at him by his only son. He always knew of an animosity that Steve held against him but never realized the magnitude of it until just then. He loved him more than anything in the world and despite Steve's denial of that, he truly would do anything for him too.

"All right, Son," he replied remarkably calm, "I'll see what I can do."

He wasn't in the least bit prepared for the sudden change of heart that his father displayed, on the contrary he was ready to go to battle with him, assured that that's what was going to happen, but the unexpected assistance caught him off guard, wondering if perhaps he had gone too far in his outburst of anger. It felt suddenly surreal to him that he wasn't talking to one of his men, reprimanding them; it was his father he was yelling at. The damage he'd inflicted was plain as day to see and he didn't feel triumphant in the least that he had gained the assistance, he did however feel slightly ashamed for his behavior, knowing the sadness in his father's eyes was there because of what he had said.

"I'll ask around tomorrow," John said as he ascended the stairs.

Steve stared at his back as he went up, hating the guilt over his behavior that grew by the second. His tall, sturdy father's shoulder slouched as he used the handrail to make the climb. He'd wounded him, wanting to apologize, but once again any words of tenderness or forgiveness between them eluded him.

"Thank you," was his response instead just as John turned the corner.

There was no reply.

...

Nikki shook uncontrollably as she sat in her cell waiting for her name to be called. She'd never been so scared in her entire life. The frightening thought of going to prison was just as apparent as the frightening reality that she was hours away from getting high. She could feel the need for it creeping up on her as time slowly ticked away.

She stood up and began to pace back and forth in the small confined space, feeling her body heating up as she sat back down to rest and try to talk herself down from this mess.

"Everything's cool. Everything's fine. Just relax." But it wasn't and she knew it. They offered her a phone call after being booked but she reluctantly declined, having absolutely no one to call for help. Anyone that she would have was in the club with her and couldn't help her anyway. She was totally alone, thinking of Stuart at that moment. He had been her first thought to call, but it also stunned her that he was out of reach now.

Tears welled up in her eyes as she slowly became keenly aware that he was gone, forever. She would never see him again. She would never hear that loving and always encouraging voice on the other end of the phone, or feel his warm secure embrace that always would remind her that no matter how far away he was, he was still her family, her big brother. All that was over. All she had left of him were the memories. She hadn't even grieved for him, feeling an overwhelming guilt hit her just then.

She had made a mess of her life and that guy was right, Stuart would have been so ashamed to see her where she was now. He was so brave and strong. He gave his life for something that he felt so strongly about. She remembered him trying to explain it to her before he left for boot camp. He was so excited and enthusiastic, knowing with all his heart that he was making the right decision. He cared about people. He was her hero but somehow in the last year she had lost sight of that.

She lay down on the steel bench and faced the wall, curling up into tight ball, trying to fight off the pain of withdrawals and the even more agonizing reality of her brother's death.

She cried like she never had before.

...

John approached Steve just outside the police station the next day, having left the house early that morning while he was out swimming. There was really no need for an awkward conversation about the night before, so John decided to just leave a cordial note saying he was leaving early to see what could be done with Nikki.

Steve searched his father's eyes as he walked toward him for any remains of what he had put there the night before, but saw none.

"She was arraigned about an hour ago," John explained, "charged with illegal possession of narcotics."

"What about bail?" Steve asked.

"It's set at $1,000. Her trial is in three weeks. I know the Judge pretty well," he smiled at Steve. "I'll talk to him, but," John sighed, "its really up to her now, Steve. She has to stay clean and prove that she's really not this person that they arrested last night. If she shows up to court in the shape I can only imagine she's in, it won't matter what I say, the judge has an obligation to the public. You understand that right?"

He nodded, "Yea. I get what you're saying. She needs to clean up her act or she's going to jail."

"Pretty much."

"Ok. Thanks, Dad. I appreciate it. Where should I go to make her bail?"

"This way."

He followed him down the hall to a counter with a window.

"They only take cash," John said to him.

"I know," Steve replied.

"You got that kind of money?"

Steve pulled out a wad of hundred dollar bills from his pocket. "I took out twelve hundred just in case." He counted out ten bills and put the other two in his back pocket.

"Hey Jimbo," John said to the man behind the window as they walked up to it.

"Hey John," he replied pleasantly. "What can I do for you?"

John motioned to Steve, "This is my son, Steve."

Jimbo leaned back as if in shock over that. "You mean the Navy Seal?"

John chuckled, "The one and only."

"Well," Jimbo exclaimed, "the way your Dad brags about you around here I half expected you to be about ten feet tall and made of steel." He laughed over his joke, getting on his toes to get a better look at him through the partition that separated them. "But you kind of come close," he laughed again. "It's nice to finally meet you, Steve."

He was surprised over the bragging comment, never imagining his Dad bragging about him. "Thanks. It's nice to meet you too." He looked over at his father who just shrugged.

"What? You're my son and you're a Navy Seal, of course I'm going to brag." He diverted his attention away from Steve's appreciative expression and focused back on why they were there. "Hey Jimbo, Steve has a buddy who's little sister has got into some trouble. The brother isn't able to come to the rescue so Steve here is going to bail her out. It's Nikki Riley."

He started typing into the computer until he heard the name and looked up at them. "Oh, she's already made bail, about ten minutes ago."

Steve and his father both looked at each other a little surprised over that, a thousand dollars was a lot of money for a twenty two year old to have just sitting around, and then all of a sudden it dawned on Steve.

"Jimmy."

John's face showed the same irritating expression as his son's over that revelation. "Hey Jimbo, can I get a look at that paperwork?"

"Sure thing John." He reached over to a tray labeled 'outbox' and took it off the top of the pile. "Here you go." He slid it under the partition opening at the bottom of the window.

Steve read it over with him and they both saw the signature at the bottom that was Jimmy's.

"Shit," Steve growled. "How long before she gets released?" he asked Jimbo.

He shrugged thinking it over, "Usually about an hour to an hour and a half."

"I need to get to her first," Steve said to his father, knowing if Jimmy did then his chances of helping her went way down.

"Hey Jimbo," John asked, "Any way you can speed up the process?"

"Yea, no problem. I'll walk the paperwork over there myself. She should be released in about thirty minutes then."

"That's great, thanks!"

"Thank you," Steve added as well.

"Hey no problem, happy to do it."

They walked over to where the detainees were released and stood by the backdoor on the inside. Normal visitors waiting for whomever they posted bail for had to wait on the outside. He was assured he would get to her first this way as well.

"I have to take off," John said to him. "I have to get back to work."

"Ok," he smiled at him appreciatively, "Thanks Dad for your help."

"Do you know what you're going to say to her?"

"Kind of, some what. I don't know. The right things I hope."

"Just remember son, she's a young girl, she's probably scared and she's only twenty two, patience's and a calm manner will get her attention."

Steve chuckled over that, "In other words, put all my military attitude to rest?"

"I didn't say that, but yes."

"I'll remember that."

"Good luck."

He watched his dad walk away and shake hands with someone in passing as he did, pointing back in his direction.

The man came up to him with his hand held out. "Hey, so you're the famous son that we hear about. I'm Brian Lukas. I've worked with your dad for a long time."

Steve smiled graciously and shook the older man's hand. "Hello Sir, it's nice to meet you. I'm Steve."

"Sir?" he chuckled, "You certainly are a Navy man aren't you? You don't get that kind of respect from young people anymore." He gently slapped him on the arm before he went on his way. "It's a relief to know there are still respectable, hard working young men out there. Keep up the good work."

"Yes, Sir. Thank you, Sir," he chuckled as he watched him walk through the backdoor.

He was shocked again that he was known in a place that he hadn't stepped foot in in more than ten years. He couldn't help but feel a sense of pride over the fact that his father obviously boasted about him to his friends. It also made him mindful of the hurtful comments he had made the night before in the heat of anger. He let his temper get the better of him. He didn't want to admit it but he had inherited a lot of his father's traits. They were both stubborn and short tempered, but he also noticed good ones as well. They both honestly cared about people who couldn't help themselves. It wasn't something he was taught; it was just something that was always there since he was a child. His dad was the same way, that's what made him such a good police officer and so highly respected from the others around them. He witnessed it first hand growing up and then again today.

Twenty minutes later the steel door that led back to where they kept the detainees opened and Steve saw Nikki come walking through. She had on a pair of baggy orange cotton pants that tied at the waist and an equally large smock shirt of the same color. They were jail clothes she was given since she was arrested in the bikini she had planned on wearing on stage until she fled the bar in it. Her hair was messy and her makeup was streaked down her face. She looked like she had been through hell and back.

"Nikki," he said to her as she stopped and looked across the way at him.

She knew who he was right away and it instantly reminded her of Stuart, missing him terribly at that second. The night in the cell had been brutal and she had never felt so terribly alone in her entire life. There was no way to conceal it either as she began to cry.

It caught Steve completely off guard, expecting an argument not tears. He could deal with one, but was finding it awkward to deal with the other. But he took his father's advice to be patient and kind and went up to her, putting a hand on her shoulder.

She fell into him and began to sob even harder.

He didn't know what to do at that point so he did what he would have done if it were Mary standing there; he put an arm around her shoulder and just held steady until she calmed enough to talk.

All she could picture was Stuart lying in some box, his eyes wide open and his face white as a ghost. She hadn't even asked how he had died, not sure she wanted to know but felt a gut wrenching guilt for not grieving for him sooner. She had tried to deny it but now in her sober state she felt the realism of it and it was unbelievably painful.

She had a moment of clarity and looked up at Steve whose expression wasn't of shock or awkwardness, on the contrary it was kind and sympathetic. Unbeknownst to her, it was also filled with guilt, knowing he was partly to blame for her grief.

"I'm sorry," she sniffed, choking out the words.

He had rehearsed for an argument but not for this, but it didn't matter how he said it, it was what he said that she needed to hear, and hopefully would.

"Listen to me Nikki," he began, wishing he had something to wipe away her tears. "Stuart was like a brother to me. His last words were that I look after his little sister. I promised him that I would. He loved you more than anything. So I'm here to help you anyway that I can. I mean that. All you have to do is ask. I can't force it on you, but if you ask for my help, then I'll do everything in my power that your brother would have."

She blinked at him as a fresh pool of tears slid down her face, knowing this was a turning point in her life, she could walk out that door and go back to her life and get high, which she was dying for at the moment, or she could take a leap of faith with this stranger who was offering her a way out of the mess she had made for herself. Not sure what he had in mind, but for some reason she trusted him. Maybe because he was the closest thing she had to Stuart now and he had been the one person in the world that she could trust.

"So," he said, deciding to use her night in jail as a tool to his advantage. "You're charged with possession of heroine. Do you want to go to jail, because that's where you're headed Nikki?"

The thought of spending one more night in a jail cell quickly made up her mind for her.

"I don't…want," her voice quivered, "to go back there." She fell into him again, "I need help, please." She started to cry again, feeling completely vulnerable to him and the situation she was in.

He smiled as he put an arm around her again, not sure exactly how he was going to get her back on track, but he was hell bent on trying.

"Ok," he squeezed her closer, "lets go."

They came out the door into the bright sunshine and she shielded her eyes, and then wiped away the fresh tears as she walked next to him. She had no idea where they were going but just followed, hoping it was far away from this place.

"Nikki," Jimmy shouted from across the parking lot. "Where you going baby? I posted bail for you."

She stopped in her tracks and so did Steve, looking over at her to see what she was going to do.

"Let's get you home," Jimmy continued as he started toward them. "You must be starving, I can help with that." He refused to make eye contact with Steve, knowing why he was there, but used Nikki's withdrawals, which he was assured, were in full bloom at the moment to lure her away from him.

Nikki knew exactly what he was referring to but held her ground anyway, staring at him as her mind raced over the argument in her head that she could just go with him and get high one last time and then she'd start anew. Just one last hit.

"What's it going to be Nikki?" Steve asked her, feeling he was already going to lose her, but she had to make the decision for herself.

His voice seemed to break the spell and she looked up at him, knowing if she went with Jimmy then she'd never see him again, and she'd be right back where she started. She took a step closer to Steve, "I want to go with you."

He smiled and put a hand on her shoulder, "Ok, wait here. I'll be right back."

He turned and went towards Jimmy, motioning to him. "Hey, come here for a sec," he said in a calm voice walking behind a white cargo van out of Nikki's sight.

"What do you want?" Jimmy said nastily as he came toward him. "I posted her bail, where do you think…" was all he got out before Steve grabbed him by the back of the neck and pushed his face up against the side of the van, holding him there with little effort, seeing the shock and fright in his eyes over the assault.

"You listen to me very carefully you little fuck! If you come near her ever again I'll kill you. Do you hear me or do I need to repeat myself?" he shoved his face harder, "This isn't a school yard fight, I will end you Jimmy." He reached in his pocket and took out the wad of hundred dollar bills and put them in Jimmy's back pocket. "Now she's all paid up. Keep your distance or you'll be shark bait."

He shoved him one last time and stepped back to see if he would retaliate but he just stood there against the van breathing hard, his face white.

"That's what I thought, you fucking pussy," Steve said as he walked away.

Nikki saw him come around the van alone and smile sweetly at her as he approached.

"My cars right over here," he said to her.

She followed behind him, glancing over her shoulder one last time, still not seeing Jimmy, but was glad for it.

She looked at Steve as he held the door to the Mercury open for her, wondering what he had said to Jimmy to make him go away, assuming it wasn't pleasant but it had done the trick. She looked at him in awe; Jimmy always got his way, but not this time.

He was like Stuart, she thought, comforted by that.

She smiled back at him as she slid in to the passenger's seat, feeling scared, relieved but most of all unsure of her future.

Steve got in and started the car, "Where do you live?" he asked her.

She looked down at her hands in her lap that she nervously rolled over and over. "Nowhere." She glanced over at him, "I was staying with a girl from the club, but," she looked back down at her hands, "I can't go back there now."

Steve completely agreed with that, knowing only one place he could take her where he'd know she'd be safe…his father's house.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

Nikki followed behind Steve into the house, already contemplating her decision whether she should have gone with Jimmy. She was becoming increasingly desperate for a high and knew if she stayed in this place, it would never happen. The night before was bad enough, but now the craving and urge for the drug that she had become dependent on was beginning to show.

"There's a spare room upstairs," Steve pointed. "You can have that. I'll sleep on the couch."

"I have to use the bathroom," she announced, feeling her body heat up as if she were standing in an oven.

Steve walked to the stairs, "Its up here."

She went past him and darted up them.

"Hey," he shouted going after her. "Are you ok?"

She went in the first door on the left and quickly closed it, leaning her head against it.

'_You're never going to make it. You're never going to make it_,' she told herself over and over. '_You need something to take the edge off, anything!' _

She turned and went straight for the medicine cabinet.

Steve leaned in closer to the door and heard the unmistakable shuffling of her rummaging through the bathroom. "What the hell is she doing?" he whispered, knocking on the door. "Nikki? Are you all right?"

"I…I'm fine," she yelled back, looking at a prescription bottle, getting a jolt of excitement until she read the label, discovering that it was only antibiotics. "Shit," she growled, tossing it in the sink and slamming the mirror closed.

"I can't do this," she whispered. "I can't. I could though if I could just take small hits. Not a lot, just little bits here and there."

Steve could hear her mumbling to herself and then stepped back as the door opened and she came past him once again headed for the stairs.

"Nikki!"

"I have to go." She had no recollection of where she was or how to get where she was going, all she did know and could concentrate on was getting high. Jimmy was her solution. She knew that was wrong but right now, at that second, she didn't care.

Steve caught her before she could reach the door and put a hand on it, preventing her from leaving.

She pulled on the knob trying to open it but it was useless, looking up and seeing his hand. "Let me go!"

"Where?" he said calmly, "Where are you going to go Nikki, to Jimmy's? Are you going to let him use you and abuse you until he's finished? Do you honestly think he gives a shit about you? He doesn't. He wants to make money off of you and that's it. And he'll keep you high and dependent on him so he can."

"I don't care! Let me out!"

He'd had enough and grabbed her by the shoulder and spun her around, getting in her face as if she were a recruit he was speaking to and had to get his point across.

"If you walk out that door, you're going to jail! Do you hear me? They will put you in jail. Did you like last night? Did you enjoy it? The next place won't be as comforting? You'll be locked up with murders and armed robbers, not just simple junkies. And they'll prey on you just like Jimmy is," he shouted. "Because nobody out there gives a shit about you! They don't care if you live or go to jail, or die!" he put a hand on his chest, "The only one that does is standing right here. And if you think I'm the one full of shit," he backed up and lifted his hands up, "then go ahead and leave. But I promise you in the next year you will either be in jail or dead. There is no doubt in my mind."

She could feel the sweat pouring down her face and could barely catch her breath, reeling over his words that sounded rational but she was still on the fence. "I can't," she started to cry, "you don't get it. I can't. I need something," she pleaded with him. "I just need a little something, that's all."

"No such thing," Steve replied. "You have to stop now. You've already made it close to twenty four hours Nikki," he encouraged her. "Just think how good it will feel not to feel this way anymore. I can help you get there. I promise. You can do it. You are so much like Stuart." He saw a spark in her eye at the sound of that name, feeding off of it, needing any advantage he could get to reason with her. "He was one of the toughest men I've ever met. He bragged about how you were so strong and so smart. He would want you to stay. Don't walk out on him. Don't walk out on your brother. It would break his heart."

She put her hands over her face, feeling as if she had already let him down. "Oh Stuart," she cried as she slid down the door until she was sitting on the floor.

She pulled her knees up to her chest and began to rock back and forth, sobbing.

Steve was just as traumatized as she was. He knelt down in front of her, pleased that he had changed her mind, but also reeling over the job he had in front of him. They were only an hour in, what were the next twenty-four going to be like?

She suddenly felt weak, both mentally and physically. The night before was like an emotional roller coaster, whipping her back and forth between grieving for her bother and fighting off the relentless craving that her body needed and she swore she had to have just to survive. But she was still here, hours later, still unbelievably craving the drug but still breathing. Now all she wanted was to lie down, her body was shutting down due to the mental exhaustion and lack of sleep.

Steve watched her begin to slump over, not sure if she were passing out or just exhausted, frightening him at first.

"Nikki?"

"I'm tired," she whimpered. "I'm so tired."

He leaned over her, getting an arm under her knees and the other around her back, lifting her with ease. She couldn't have weighed much more than 110lbs; her five-foot, seven frame thin and wiry. She laid her head on his shoulder as he carried up the steps, still whimpering softly.

...

John came in the front door and let it swing closed behind him as he took off his gun.

Steve came running out of the kitchen with his finger up to his lips, shushing him. "Dad! Keep it down," he whispered loudly, glancing up the steps for any sign of movement from Nikki as if she were a sleeping baby.

"What's going on," he replied softly and then all at once he figured it out, his expression changing from confused to shocked. "You brought her here?!"

Steve shrugged innocently, "She's strung out pretty bad. She had nowhere else to go. Literally nowhere."

"What about a rehab center?"

"I can't leave here at a place like that."

John looked at him annoyed and then pointed toward the back door as he made his way to it.

They came outside and walked halfway to the water before his father turned to him, not needing to whisper any longer. "Are you out of your mind, Steve! She can't stay here. She needs professional help."

"We can't force her to stay at a place like that and I don't think she will."

"That's not your responsibility, Son."

"Yes it is! I promised her brother that I'd watch over her and I'm going to do just that."

"Have you ever dealt with someone before who is addicted to drugs? It's not like she'll wake up tomorrow and be ok to go. She's going to be a train wreck."

"I'm aware," Steve stated, "I've been on the Internet for the past three hours researching and…"

"Oh!" John exclaimed sarcastically, "you've been on the Internet researching, well then you must have it all figured out now!"

Steve glared at him, hoping that his father would have his back but not really surprised that he didn't.

"Look Dad," he said between gritted teeth, "I made a promise to watch over this girl to a dying friend of mine. I can't just ship her off somewhere and walk away from that promise. I know that's how you think, but I don't. If you don't want us here then I'll take her someplace else!"

"Don't try and manipulate me by guilt, Steven! You brought a stranger into our home. One with severe problems and you don't even have the decency or common courtesy to ask, let alone discuss it with me beforehand!"

Steve instantly cooled his jets, knowing that his father was right this time. He walked past him a couple of steps, staring out at the water as he shook his head, feeling overwhelmed himself over the ordeal, but still not able to walk away.

"I can't just drop her off someplace, Dad. I just can't."

John sensed his turmoil but needed more than that to change his mind. "Who is this girl, Steve? What is it that you're not telling me?"

He had to come clean with him about Stuart; it hurt in more ways than one to tell him, especially after the morning at the station with the realization of his father's bragging about him being such a great Navy Seal. He was about to put that theory to rest.

"I fucked up, Dad. Stuart died because of me. I gave the orders that got him killed."

John heard something in his son's voice that he hadn't before, shame and guilt. "Steve, you gave an order. You can't tell me that you deliberately sent him into a dangerous situation on purpose, knowing the outcome?"

He shook his head, "No, but I let my arrogance take control and it backfired on me and now Stuart is dead and that girl upstairs is without her brother, the only family she had."

It all began to make sense to him now. It was worse than he thought. No words he said would change what Steve was feeling, he knew that. The only thing he could do as a father was let him fulfill this promise he had made to his friend and help in anyway he could.

"Ok," he sighed, not fully on board, but led by some of that guilt that Steve threw at him. He couldn't toss the two of them out, not now. Their father, son relationship was already constantly teetering on destruction and he felt if he didn't back him up now, then it would surely be the last straw. "Ok, she can stay."

Steve turned around and faced him, appreciative over that, not really sure that he would get the green light until it was given.

"Thanks, Dad. I'll take care of everything. You won't even know she's here."

John huffed, "You better get back on the Internet and do some more researching, because you're naïve if you think that's true."

...

Nikki rolled over and opened her eyes. She had slept for nearly five hours but didn't feel even the slightest bit rested. Her hands hurt, her head hurt, her legs ached, her whole body felt stiff and the cool air coming in through the open window from the ocean was stifling hot to her. She felt as though she were suffocating in that room, rolling over to the other side but unable to find a comfortable position.

She sat up and rubbed her hands vigorously over her face, feeling the slippery wetness of the sweat that had built up over the past couple of minutes since she'd been awake. She pulled the orange top that they'd given her in jail over her head and tossed it aside, still not feeling relieved.

"Ahh, god," she whimpered, glancing around the room and for the first time actually taking in her surroundings. It took her a second to remember where she was.

'_That guy.'_ she thought, struggling to remember Steve's name, her mind too cluttered with the thought of getting high.

She glanced around the room looking for any sign of a baggy or a stray needle that might have just a tiny remain of a previous hit. At the moment she'd scoop together dust particles off the floor and inject them if she thought it would help.

"Jimmy," she mumbled and struggled to get out of bed. He'd have something. She'd beg for forgiveness and even dance five shows in a row if he'd just give her one fix.

She started to come down the stairs and slipped on one of the steps gripping the handrail, which did little to prevent her fall due to her sweaty palms.

John came off the couch and was startled at what he saw. The young girl looked like something out of freak show to him. Her long, blue tinted hair was damp and sticking to her head and bare shoulders, hiding her face, but he could hear her grunting and panting as if she were struggling to get out of a trap and all she was actually doing was trying to stand.

He went up halfway to meet her and help.

"Are you ok?" he asked.

She lifted her head and was shocked, never seeing him before, confused now and really scared over where she was.

"Who are you?!" she yelled, backing up the stairs on her butt, screaming out her brother's name, "Stuart!" she hollered.

Steve came around from the kitchen and came up to meet them as his Dad slowly took a step back.

"Nikki!" He went to reach out for her when she slapped his hand away.

"Get back!" she shouted. "I have to go!" A split second later she was on her feet and using the handrail with both hands to try and maneuver the steps as if she'd never experienced stairs before in her life.

Steve put an arm around her waist and caught her just as she began to fall again.

"Nikki wait! You can't leave!"

She began to struggle with him, pulling on the handrail but when she realized that was no use she began to flail her arms and kick her legs to get out of his grip.

"Let me go!" she screamed.

He moved his head just in time to get out of the way of her elbow only to be met in the groin with her knee as she kicked at him.

He grunted loudly over the pain of it but never lost his grip, but did lose his patience, bringing both his arms from around her back and holding hers down at her side as she kicked and fought him.

He lifted her up and grunted again as she kicked him in the shin over and over with her legs, trying to get lose. He backed up the stairs holding her securely. She was clearly no match for his strength.

John stood at the bottom of the stairs in shock as he watched Steve carry her up and disappear around the corner, hearing a picture fall on the floor as she kicked the wall.

Steve got her pinned in the corner of the hallway with her face against the wall and held her there with his body.

"Nikki! Stop fighting me!"

"I want to go!" she growled.

"No! I made your brother a…" she whipped her head back and connected with his lower lip. "Goddamnit!" he cussed, using his right forearm to push down on the back of her neck, keeping it secure. "I made…" he grunted as she continued to fight him, "your brother a promise and…ouch!" he yelled as she bit him.

He had enough and pushed off of her, standing back, "Fine! Go then! Go running back to Jimmy and get high! I'll sprinkle your ashes over the Club 808!"

At the first hint of freedom she bolted past him to the stairs and down them, stopping only briefly as she spotted John standing by the couch in the living room. She whirled around seeing the door and went for it.

She came outside and had no idea where she was going, but she was free to get high. The feeling was exhilarating and she could almost taste the sweetness of it, getting a natural high just off the prospect of being so close to a synthetic one.

She ran to the black Mercury that was parked out front, recognizing it as the car she had arrived in.

She went for the driver's side pulling on the handle not able to open the locked door and began to pound on the window when she swore she heard Stuart's voice say her name. It was as crystal clear as the image of him standing behind her in the mirror at the club, telling her to run.

She froze, hoping to see him again in the reflection of the car window when a second of clarity in her troubled head found her.

She saw herself.

The haunting image was enough to pull her out of the moment of hysteria as she stared at the reflection, disturbed by the haunting person staring back at her.

Steve slowly walked toward her but kept a distance. He followed her out of the house, realizing his error just seconds after releasing her from his grip, chasing after her, but stopped now as she stood frozen next to the car like a statue, not sure what was happening but she was calm for the moment, not wanting to disturb her and set her off again.

She didn't even know who she was anymore. She wasn't a student. She wasn't a friend. She wasn't a sister. She didn't even look human with her tinted blue hair that was dirty and sweaty. Her face was gaunt and the dark makeup around her eyes made her image look even more haunting.

How did she get here? She couldn't even answer that question. It was a series of bad decisions over time that formed her into the person she had become. A monster.

She felt another presence and turned her head, hoping to see Stuart, but saw Steve instead.

"Stuart is dead," she said barely above a whisper, not speaking to anyone but reminding herself that he wouldn't come to her rescue like he had so many times growing up. She knew she was on her own…until she heard his voice.

"Nikki," Steve said, still keeping a distance but wanting to say something, anything to make her come back inside the house. In his own moment of clarity he had to listen to reason and took in account that perhaps his dad was right, she needed professional help. He couldn't keep her there against her will but maybe in a rehab center they could convince her to stay clean. He was contemplating getting her there when her next move took him completely by surprise.

Why was she running from him? She asked herself that question but knew the answer. It was the drugs she was running too, not him that she was running from. She was going to die if she kept running. He said that to her and she knew it was true. By the image in the window she was already halfway there. She had to decide right then and there which way she was going to go.

She was twenty-two years old and didn't want to die. She had to use every bit of strength she had left to fight the demons that were crawling around inside of her, but she couldn't do it alone. She looked over at him again and knew she wouldn't have to.

He watched her slowly walk to him and stop.

"I want to go back," she said, her voice as small and broken as the young woman standing there. "I won't run again," she promised, walking past him back toward the house.

Steve turned and watched her shuffle as she practically dragged her weary body back to the house.

He let out a deep breath of relief and smiled triumphantly as he followed her back inside, closing the door behind him.

He got her back upstairs and in bed, going back down to get her some water.

"She's back on board," Steve said to his father as he passed him going to the kitchen.

John followed after him, "Are you out of your mind, Steve? She's clearly unstable! It's worse than I thought."

"No kidding, Dad. She's addicted to heroin." He opened a cupboard and then closed it, going for the one next to it, looking for a water bottle.

"You're not qualified to take care of her."

He closed the next cupboard and began at the ones at his knees. "It's just a matter of getting it out of her system. The detox timeframe for heroine is really not that long. The worst part lasts only a few hours to get them over the hump; the other symptoms last about a week. She hasn't been addicted for that long so I think it might be a little easier for her, not that its going to be easy by any means." He finally found what he'd been looking for and went to the sink. "I'm not naïve, Dad."

"I think you are being grossly naïve. Did you not just see what happened here?"

Steve screwed the lid on the water bottle and turned to him. "Yes, and she came back. She wants help. I thought that's what you were all about, helping people. You are a cop." He was getting the idea that he had changed his mind about them being there. "Are you having second thoughts about her being here?"

"Yes!" He didn't think there was any legal excuse he could give for her being there, since she did come back in on her own, but still, he felt it was dangerous.

"I can handle it. Look…" he sighed, "Give me twenty-four hours. If you still think I'm making the wrong decision then we'll do it your way and I'll drop her off someplace."

John shook his head, hating this idea but also hated that he felt he owed Steve the chance. "Fine! I don't like it though."

"Noted." Steve rolled his eyes as he walked past him.

John watched him go up the stairs, irritated more with himself than he was with Steve. He felt backed into a corner, but had a hard time standing up to his son. That constant fear that he may never see him again was always hovering over his head making him walk on eggshells, even against his better judgment.

...

Steve sat on the edge of the bed and dipped the washcloth in the cool bucket of water and wringed it out, placing it on Nikki's face and wiping away the sweat as she shivered.

He pulled the afghan up higher on her body so it was just below her shoulders, but she used her legs to kick it off just seconds later.

"Too hot," she murmured.

"I have a fan, should I get it?" he asked her, hoping he could do something to ease her uncomfortable state. She'd been going through withdrawals for the past two days and every time he was assured the worst part was over, he was wrong.

She didn't answer him about the fan, concentrating too much on not flying down the stairs and out of the front door, running all the way to her dealer's house.

_'You're almost there,'_ she told herself. '_Don't give up. Think of something else.' _She closed her eyes as Steve used the cool cloth again on her face, picturing a pretty day at Lanikai Beach, her favorite, but only seconds into the picturesque vision she recalled a time being there high and looking out at the Mokulua Islands across the way, convinced she could swim out to them. She didn't focus on the commotion she made on the beach of having to be dragged back in by friends to prevent her from drowning, but more on the high and how good she felt that day.

She moaned softly and curled up tight, pulling on the blanket to cover herself again, feeling cold now. Steve helped her but knew it would only last seconds. Her body seemed to change its mind on the temperature every few minutes, but he did what he could to accommodate her.

John came in the room holding a tray, balancing it on his right hand as he wrapped his knuckles softly on the partially opened door.

"Hey, can I come in?"

Steve looked over his shoulder at him and responded, "I didn't know you were here. What's up?" It was the first time that John had actually acknowledged that she was there since their disagreement about the arrangements.

"Nothing, nothing," he said, taking a hold of the tray with both hands. He noticed right away the unshaven face of his son, wondering if he'd got any sleep the past twenty-four hours. He had stayed at a friend's house the night before to let them have the house, feeling uneasy about her being there. He looked down at the shivering body, concerned. "Is she ok?!"

Steve nodded and dipped the cloth in the bucket again. "She's a trooper. She's stronger than steel. Aren't you, Nikki?" he said to her, putting a hand on her shoulder and gently massaging it, but only for a second, knowing first hand that being touched right now was not something that was comforting to her.

"I feel like shit," she whimpered. "But I'm not going to die today," she repeated Steve's reassuring words that he'd said to her, among others, trying to encourage her.

He smiled over that, using the washcloth on her forehead again. "That's right," he said to her, "Stuart would be so proud of you."

She liked the sound of that and smiled slightly over it. It gave her strength she didn't know she had left.

"I brought you something to eat," John said, setting the tray down on the dresser.

Steve glanced over at the meal and shook his head. "She can't eat that sandwich, she'll throw up." He said it as if he had first hand knowledge of that information.

"The sandwich is for you," he replied. "The broth is for Nikki."

He looked over at him again and then at the tray of food, feeling his stomach rumble. He couldn't remember the last time he had eaten. It had been a long night and a difficult one taking care of her. She had vomited several times, twice on him as he tried to get her to the bathroom, settling for a bucket on the floor next to the bed. It was the diarrhea that had him worried for a while, keeping as much liquid in her as he could but every time she ate or drank something she would either vomit or be on the toilet. He kept a close eye on dehydration signs; knowing them well from personal experiences of being in hot deserts throughout the Middle East, so far she was ok.

"I could eat something." He leaned over Nikki, "Are you hungry, Sweetheart?" he asked her, taking on the surname after she had confessed in a flood of tears that it was what Stuart used to call her sometimes and so had her father when he was alive.  
She shook her head, her eyes still closed. "I'm tired," she whimpered.

He put a hand on her head, "Ok, try and get some sleep." He stood up when she quickly looked over her shoulder at him.

"Where are you going?" She had come to rely on him through this ordeal, feeling comforted by him being there.

He bent over and stroked her shoulder reassuringly. "I'm not going anywhere. I promise."

She rolled back over and curled up, shuddering as she exhaled. "Ok," she replied softly, trusting him wholeheartedly.

He went over to the tray of food and picked up the oversize sandwich and took a bite. His taste buds ignited over the glorious delicacy.

"Steve," John said, motioning toward the hall outside the bedroom door.

Steve followed him out and closed the door, but left it just slightly ajar so he could hear Nikki if she called for him or began to throw up again.

John watched as he took another bite of the sandwich, "When was the last time that you ate?"

Steve shrugged.

"I was thinking last night while I was gone," John began, "that I shouldn't have left."

Steve shrugged again, talking with his mouth full, "I'm actually glad that you did. It would have been stressful for me to have you here last night with all that went on. I didn't have to worry about keeping it down or whether or not I was taking care of her properly."

"You are," he quickly replied. "I can see that now. What I'm trying to say is that…I want to help."

"Why?" Steve asked, not really needing nor wanting the help now.

"Because," John replied, "I guess I want to support you. I haven't really been able to do that in a long time."

Steve chuckled as he took another bite, "Ok, but what brought this on so suddenly?"

"Do I need a reason?" He had one, but didn't feel it necessary to get sentimental.

"It's your house I guess and we kind of invaded it. I don't want to tell you no, but I'm not sure what you can do, besides laundry maybe. I'm almost out of towels."

"First off, it's not just my house," he reminded him, "this is your home as well. And how about if I throw in a load and then come back up and sit with her while you get some shuteye? Just a couple of hours would do you well. You look exhausted."

He went to dismiss that idea but the thought of laying his head on a pillow sounded actually pretty tempting. He'd barely slept the night before and what he did get was in a chair next to Nikki's bed, and after devouring the sandwich he now felt even more tired.

"Ok," he caved. "Just for a little while. I'll let Nikki know."

"I'll put that load in and be right back up then." John went down the stairs with a smile on his face.

Steve went back in the room and quietly up to the bed, hearing her snoring softly. She was just as exhausted as he was, hoping they both got some good shuteye.

...

Nikki startled in her sleep and woke even more so, calling out her brother's name.

"Stuart!" she cried out, waking from the nightmare as they laid his body out in an unmarked grave with blood splattered all over the inside of the plastic body bag he was in. "No Stuart!"

John quickly set the book aside he had been reading and leaned forward in the chair, putting a hand on her shoulder. "It's ok," he said gently. "It was just a dream."

She rolled over, hearing an unfamiliar voice. Her eyes got big as she scanned the room for Steve. "Steve!" she shouted, scooting away from John.

"It's ok," John reassured her, holding his hands up as if letting her know he was harmless. "He's asleep. I'm his father, John McGarrett. He just needed some rest for a while." He stood up, "I could get him if you want?"

Nikki recognized him then as the man standing in the living room the day before when she had tried to run. Or was it two days ago? It could have been a week, she didn't know, having lost all sense of time. It was barely daytime now, but she didn't know if it was sunset, or sunrise and really didn't care either. She did know that Steve had been there every time she looked for him or needed assistance to the bathroom, or the bucket held for her when she threw up. He never slept that she knew of. She wanted the security of him close but also felt guilty for waking him up if he was finally getting some rest.

"No," she replied wearily, "I'm ok." If he was Steve's father she felt she could trust him. She laid her head back down on the pillow.

"Are you hungry?" he asked her. "I made some broth for you. I could warm it up in just a jiffy."

Her stomach felt empty but she was still weary of putting anything into it, knowing what happened the last four or five times that she had, but the sound of it was too tempting. "Ok, maybe just a little."

He patted the mattress next to her. "Sit tight. I'll be right back."

She sat up as he left, moaning as she pushed her body back against the headboard, feeling as if she were fighting every muscle in her body just to get to that simple position. She ached all over, feeling a little nauseous as she sat up.

The dream came to her and she felt a dread overcome her. The sadness of it was just painful enough to bring on a craving, knowing a hit would quickly dull that pain.

"It was just a dream," she told herself. "Think of something else. Think of something else."

Steve's voice came to her filled with words of encouragement as she struggled in those first few hours, repeating them out loud as her own voice of encouragement.

"You've only got three choices in life, give up, give in, or give it all you got." Or the one she could most relate too, "Pain is weakness leaving the body. Pain is weakness leaving the body."

John came in holding the tray of food and admired her words as she sat there, eyes closed repeating them over and over.

He set the tray on the dresser as she opened her eyes back up, feeling slightly embarrassed over her daily affirmation.

"Don't let me stop you," he said with a smile. "Those were excellent mottos. I might steal that 'pain is weakness' one." He sat down on the edge of the bed and handed her the bowl.

Her hands trembled as she reached for it unable to control the shaking.

"Here," he said, dipping the soup spoon into the broth, "let me help." He carefully lifted it to her lips. "I used to feed my daughter like this when she was sick."

Nikki accepted the spoonful, feeling the warm broth hit her dry throat as she swallowed. It felt good.

"How old is your daughter?" she asked him.

"About your age. She lives in Costa Rica right now." He dipped the spoon in again.

She thought about Steve and his strengths, assuming this girl, his sister, was a mirror image of him. "Is she a lot like Steve?" She opened her mouth for some more broth.

John chuckled, "Oh no. They are about as different as two people can be."

She smiled over that. "That sounds like me and Stuart. He was always so strong and smart. He could do anything he set his mind to. Me on the other hand…" she sighed, feeling that wave of uncertainty of where her life was going. "Not so much."

"I don't believe that," John said, putting the spoon up to her lips again as she reluctantly took another sip of it. "I'm looking at you right now and I see a very strong and determined young woman." He scooped up some more broth, "You made the choice to change things around; no one else, just you."

"But Steve is the one who…" she began when John interrupted her.

"Steve is just there to help you up and catch you when you fall, but you are doing the work. He wouldn't be here if you didn't make the choice to get clean. Which I might add is very, very commendable. I'm a Police Officer. I see young people fall everyday to the type of life you were living and it breaks my heart. But when I see someone like you taking a stand," he smiled proudly at her. "You're an inspiration."

They were exactly alike she thought, knowing now where Steve got all his good-natured wisdom from. '_It must have been awesome growing up in this house_,' she thought to herself.

"You kinda remind me of my Dad," she said to him, which produced another smile from him that was familiar to her. '_He and Steve look like father and son too,'_ she thought. "My Dad wasn't a Police Officer though. He worked construction. He died when I was seventeen."

"I'm sorry to hear that, Nikki. That must have been really hard on you and Stuart?"

"It was." She motioned with her hand that she didn't want any more broth. "Stuart joined the Navy just before I graduated from high school. He waited until I turned eighteen so I could live on my own. He sent me money though, every week it was there in my checking account. He also helped me get into college. That was our plan. He went to the Navy and I go to college. He did really well. He was a Navy Seal like Steve," she bragged and then her voice saddened. "And me, I couldn't even make it through four years of college."

"You got a second chance though," John reminded her. "Go back and get your degree."

She sighed, "I want to, but I don't think I'll be able to get in the dorms next year. I only have one year left."

"What are you studying?"

"Marketing and Business."

She put her hand on her stomach.

"Are you feeling ok?" John asked, wondering if she were going to vomit.

"Yes," she smiled, "I actually don't feel nauseous at all. I think it's the first thing I've eaten since I don't know when, that I don't feel sick."

"It'll only get better," he assured her.

"You're nice. Thank you for letting me stay here. I'll leave as soon as I can."

"There's no rush, Nikki. You just get well. That's more important."

"I'm kinda tired now." She slid back down into the bed. The cravings were relentless as she felt another one coming on. She began to associate them with depressing thoughts, talking about school and her homeless situation brought this one on, but visualizing good times with Stuart sometimes helped.

"Ok, you just go to sleep."

"Thank you again," she said, rolling over on her side and curling up, picturing she and Stuart playing Frisbee on the beach.

He thought her a delightful young woman, even under the circumstances she still found a moment to thank him for his hospitality, which he didn't expect or need. She had made some bad decisions in her life but he didn't blame her for them, who hadn't. He certainly had his share, thinking of the day he had taken Steve and Mary to the airport after his wife had died. At the time, he was without a doubt assured that it was the right thing to do. The circumstances surrounding their mother's death was just too unusual, but if he could turn back time; he's not so sure now he would have made the same decision.

Mary cried and hugged him tightly, apparently understanding, but Steve…he recalled the bitterness and resentment that was all over his face, refusing any kind of separation embrace as he stood by the gate door to the plane, waiting for his little sister.

John walked by the master bedroom and saw him lying in his bed asleep, changing his mind right then and there, assured now that if he could go back he wouldn't have done what he had, loosing his son the way he had is what changed his mind. They had a good relationship before that day, but it transformed overnight and he made the costly error of assuming Steve would grow out of it and come around, but ten years later, here they were.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

Nikki came down the stairs for the first time, four days after entering the McGarrett home.

She was freshly showered and clean but by no means ready to pursue her life again. She still had miles to go and she knew it. This was just one of many steps to recovery. She felt the hardest part was over by getting her body used to not having the drug again, but the cravings were still there, wondering if they would ever go away.

"Welcome to our humble domain." John said, holding out his arms as if displaying their home to her for the first time. "Make yourself at home."

Nikki smiled over his politeness, "Thank you, Mr. McGarrett."

"You can call me John you know," he said to her.

She looked at him sheepishly, feeling as if that would be like calling her dad by his first name. "I know…but…"

He understood her thinking and let it slide, finding it respectively charming. "Mr. McGarrett it is then."

"If you call me Mr. McGarrett," Steve joked, "then no dessert for you."

She chuckled over that tucking her blue tinted hair behind her ear. She had on a pair of sweat pants that were too big for her and an equally oversized T-shirt of Steve's. Her weight was well below normal and even though she was pale from the strenuous past couple of days, she looked one hundred percent better than she did the day she was released from jail. Her blue eyes had sparkle again, filled with hope for a positive future.

"Have a seat," Steve said, pulling out a chair for her at the table.

"Thank you," she replied shyly.

"I hope you like chicken and rice. I'm not much of a cook, but my dad is."

She looked over her shoulder at him as he scooted her up to the table. "I like both of those."

He patted her shoulder gently and went over to the stove to join his dad who was scooping up portions of the food on to plates.

"Not too much for her," he whispered to his father.

"I cut one breast in half and they said about a half a cup of rice," he replied, referring to 'they' as the informative website they had both been getting their information from on taking care of her.

The first night by himself had been like hell for Steve. He constantly questioned whether he was doing the right thing by keeping her home rather than taking her someplace as she sweated buckets while her body forced the drugs out by any means possible, but his due diligence paid off and with the extra help from his dad since then, they were positive they had triumphantly made it over the hump.

Nikki sat in the chair staring at the front door, knowing just on the outside of this perfect little shelter she was living in was Jimmy. She still owed him money and knew he'd never leave her alone until she paid him. She had nowhere to go and no job. Going back to school was out of the question for this term. She would have been dropped from her classes by now and there was no way that Lori would let her back in the dorm room anyway. She had burned that bridge.

She felt a heavy despair begin to creep up on her when Steve set the plate of food down in front of her.

"You must be starving, but just eat slow and let your stomach adjust to not eating for a couple of days, ok?"

She looked over at him as he took the seat across from her at the table, "Ok." She would have no problem with his suggestion because her appetite had vanished once she was left alone with her thoughts. Glad for the disruption because she could feel that sinister voice in her head awaking and reminding her how good it used to feel right after a hit. The euphoric rush is what she got addicted to. It took away all her problems of the day, whispering to her that it would take away these new ones as well.

She pushed the menacing voice back down and picked up her fork, forcing herself to take a bite of the food. '_You've only got three choices in life, give up, give in, or give it all you got._' She repeated Steve's quote to herself two more times before it sunk in. '_Fuck you,_' she responded to the voice and took another bite of the chicken.

...

Nikki stood on the bottom step of the stairs and looked at Steve asleep on the couch. She glanced over at the door with one thought in mind and that was to get out without waking him. She didn't care about the progress she had made, all she could think about was getting that hit that would feel so good. It consumed her as she lie in bed, until she talked herself into getting up, getting dressed and sneaking out. She had made it through detox once already she thought arrogantly; she could do it again, not recalling at that particular moment the pain and agony of it. Even if she did recall the difficulty of it, she was at a point where she didn't care. She just wanted to get high and nothing was going to stop her.

"Where you going?" a voice in the darkness asked her. Steve sat up on the couch but made no attempt to stop her if she fled.

"I…I…um," she stammered, glancing back at the door as she took another step toward it.

"Go ahead," he said dryly. "Go ahead and go. You don't have to be sneaky about it either. You're not a prisoner here, you were our guest."

She felt a wave of guilt wash over her from his choice of words, but her agenda hadn't changed. "Thank you for all that you did, but I can't do this. I just can't. I might as well admit it now and just get it over with."

"Jesus," Steve laughed. "That's such a copout. I thought you were like Stuart, but you're not. You're a coward. You're weak. Go ahead," he waved at the door. "Run off into the night little girl."

"I'm not a little girl!" she said through gritted teeth.

"You are as naïve as they come, Nikki. Jimmy sees that in you and that's what he preys upon. You're nothing but a meal ticket for him. He'll have you on your back in no time."

"I'm not a whore!" she spat. Shocked over this type of harsh treatment from him. It stung worse than the craving.

"Not yet," he replied calmly, "but you'll go back to the club, you have no choice and then you'll be trapped again. He'll have you taking your clothes off and swinging from a poll for men and then he'll have you on your back. You know it and I know it, so stop playing these bullshit games with me." He waved his hand toward the door again. "What are you waiting for? Go!"

"You don't understand?" she screeched, running her fingers through her hair and gripping on to it with both hands and pulling it, "I can't do this! It's too hard!" she growled. "You can't understand what I'm feeling!"

"Oh poor little you!" Steve said in a whiny voice, coming off the couch. "Life has been so hard hasn't it, Nikki. Don't tell me I don't understand! I lost everything when I was sixteen years old. My home! My family! Don't act like you're some kind of victim, because it's bullshit! You're letting yourself become one. So go on…" he gently shoved her toward the door. "Go back to Jimmy. Let him use you until he's done and then you'll be nothing but a washed up junkie whore by the time your twenty-five. What are you waiting for? That glamorous high and life is waiting for you. Go get it."

He shoved her again but she resisted, pushing his hand away.

"Don't touch me!"

He stood his ground, but then again so did she. He wasn't going to beg her to stay. He was exhausted, maybe as much as she was and his patience had hit it's limit about five minutes before when he woke up and saw her trying to sneak out. He felt he'd fulfilled his duty to Stuart, too pissed off at the moment to care about it anymore.

She wanted to run out the door so badly and prove him wrong; she wouldn't end up like that, but part of her knew he was right and that was the part that wouldn't let her move. She dropped to the floor on her knees, still gripping her hair as she fought through the craving that was pulling her in the other direction.

He watched her rock back and forth griping her stomach and moaning as if she were in pain. He declined the sympathetic and gentle hands that she had become accustom to.

She was fighting her way through it and it broke his heart to watch her struggle but he had to let her be, knowing now wasn't the time to cave in and cater to her needs. She had to learn that she could do it on her own. She was stronger than she thought but she had to figure it out on her own. He'd seen this similar 'tough love' tactic used on men in his unit during BUD/S training, including himself. Sometimes it worked and sometimes they rang the bell and went home.

The rocking went on for several minutes until she finally stopped, falling forward on her hands and knees; her hair hanging down and covering her face. She stayed like that for another couple of minutes before she turned and crawled toward the stairs as if too weak to stand.

Steve went toward her when she turned her head, hair still covering her face. "Leave me alone!" she spat. "I don't want your help!"

He backed away as she used the bottom rail of the stairs to pull herself up and take that first step back up to her room.

John stood in his bedroom doorway, having listened to the whole conversation, shocked over some of the things Steve had said to her, but refusing to interfere. The most disheartening to him was his confession of losing everything when he was sixteen, hearing the anger and bitterness in his voice. It wasn't an act to get his point across to Nikki; it came from his heart. He backed up into his room as she finally made the long, agonizing trip up, going to her room and slamming the door shut.

Steve sat down on the couch and bent over, running his hands over his head, relieved beyond belief that she stayed but surprised as hell at how emotionally wrought he felt over the encounter now that it was over.

He wiped his thumb and index finger over his eyes, collecting the uncontrollable moisture that was collecting there. '_Quit,_' he scolded himself, '_McGarrett men don't feel emotion; you know that. She's fine now so get ahold of yourself.' _

He looked up and shook his head, clearing away the emotional debris that was cluttering his thoughts. He looked over toward the stairs and up in the direction of Nikki's room, admitting to himself that if she would have tried to run, he would have chased her down. Maybe not right at that moment, but he eventually would have. She was becoming more than just a mission for him to accomplish. He began to feel his role as big brother take shape as his attachment toward her grew, seeing so much potential and considering it a personal failure if he didn't see this through successfully.

Nikki lay on her side and faced the wall, feeling so many different emotions it was hard to focus on one for too long before another would take over. But one that she did recognize that she hadn't for a long time was joy. It was small but it was there. She had beat out that inner voice that had turned her against herself. It gave her renewed strength that she feared had vanished along with her self-esteem, but to her surprise the natural adrenaline rush she got from it felt better than an artificial one she injected with a needle.

Another emotion she hadn't felt strongly in along time was love, geared toward someone besides the brotherly love she had for her brother. She took credit for her achievement of breaking the drug habit, but not all of it. She shuddered to think where she'd be right now if Steve hadn't woken. The things he said to her were harsh but he wasn't far from the truth either, she had to admit that to herself.

Her heart fluttered over the thought of him standing there so gallantly, fighting for her. No man had done that for her before, besides Stuart, but it was different with Steve, he wasn't her brother. She also admitted to herself that part of the reason she stayed was because of him. The confrontation made her acutely aware that in all the controversy with herself, she didn't in fact want to disappoint him. Surprised over that revelation. His approval was beginning to take shape into something that she needed. The thought of him seeing her as a whore was the statement that probably saved her.

His devotion had formed an attachment that she felt for him, but after the display downstairs it was slowly becoming an attraction. She wasn't as naïve as he thought she was, knowing he would never see her as anything more than Stuart's little sister and she was ok with that. It was more comforting to know that there was someone out there so caring and protective of her, not only one person she thought but two, being reminded of John, and neither wanted a thing from her, except for her to be healthy and happy.

...

Nikki slowly came down the steps the next morning, smelling bacon cooking. She couldn't hide in her room all day from him and knew it was her responsibility to face him, hoping he wasn't still mad at her. Her stomach rumbled, not only because of the delightful smell but she was mainly nervous about seeing him.

"Good morning," Steve said as she came down the last step. He too had been anticipating their greeting deciding to just put everything that had happened the night before to rest. "I hope you're hungry. I've got a lumberjack breakfast going here," he chuckled over the amount of food that he had prepared.

The pleasant greeting was music to her ears. The nervousness vanished and all that remained was hunger pains.

"Yes," she replied. "I am hungry."

"Good." He pointed toward the fridge, "Can you get the OJ and I'll get you a plate?"

"Ok," she agreed happily, doing as he asked.

She sat down at the table and poured each of them a glass. "Is your dad coming too?"

"No. He left early this morning for work."

She watched him walk toward her carrying two plates when that familiar flutter of affection washed over her again. He was gorgeous, that was just a fact of life, but along with his attention to detail that was directed solely towards her, the attraction she felt for him grew to a new level. For the first time since meeting him she became self-conscious of her appearance, not needing a mirror to tell her what she must look like with blue hair and dark circles under her eyes. She bent her head and used her fingers to try and fix her hair some, but settled with tucking it behind her ears.

"It looks good," she said as he set the plate down and then took the seat across from her. "Thank you," she said sincerely.

"You're welcome," he smiled across at her, glad that the night before was all but forgotten.

She picked up a piece of bacon and took a small bite, feeling her mouth water over the delightful taste. She wanted to devour the breakfast; never feeling so famished before in her entire life, but took small bites not wanting to look like a lumberjack as she ate with him. He on the other hand ate like Stuart, big bites and as if he was on a very tight schedule. She assumed that was because of his military life. She remembered Stuart telling her once that during Seal training after nine hours of an intense workout, they had only four minutes to eat dinner and that included standing in line to get their food. It reminded her then that he would be leaving soon. She looked across at him and felt sadness over the separation.

"When do you have to report back for duty?" she asked him.

"I have to head back in four days." He saw instantly the disappointment on her. "I've been wanting to talk to you about that." He set his fork down and picked up his OJ, washing down the pancakes. "I've been looking at some places that I think might be good for you. I want to know what you think."

"What kind of places?"

"Rehab centers."

"Oh," she said quietly, setting her fork down.

"I know it might sound kinda scary Nikki, but I also think they could do a world of good for you. I mean my dad and I did the best we could, but…"

"You did great," she assured him. "Thank you for it too."

He smiled over at her, "You're welcome, but I still think for the long haul you should see someone professionally."

She nodded in agreement, trusting his judgment over her own. "How much do they cost?"

"Don't worry about that," he replied, glad that she was on board. "The state will pick up most of it and I'll take care of the rest."

She shook her head, "No! You can't do that. I'll figure it out. I think Stuart had some money."

"He did," Steve explained, "but you'll need that to make a fresh start once you're out of rehab. The out of pocket cost is not that much," he lied. "I can handle it." He shrugged, "Some day you can pay me back. How's that?"

She nodded adamantly, "I will. I promise."

He grinned over at her, "Ok. Then maybe today if you're feeling up to it we can go look at a couple of places to see how you feel about them."

"Ok, but what about my trial? There's a good chance I could go to jail." She began to feel sick to her stomach over that, remembering the night she'd been arrested.

"My dad is working on that," he assured her. "He knows the Judge and he also knows how hard you've been working to get better. He'll put in a good word for you, but you have to stay clean Nikki, or you will go to jail."

"I know," she quickly acknowledged that important piece of information. "I know I said last time that I wouldn't run off again, and then last night…" she bent her head ashamed. "I promise," she looked up and straight into his eyes, "I won't do it again, Steve. I swear I won't."

He didn't really believe that but at the moment he believed that she did, so he gave her the benefit of the doubt. "It's all up to you Nikki. You have to want it more than I want it for you, or more than my dad does. It has to come from you." He sat back in his chair looking at her. "You have so much potential. You're smart, pretty…"

"I'm not pretty. I'm a mess." She bent her head again and blushed,

He stood up and reached across the table, putting his fingers under her chin and lifting her face up so he could see it. "You're very pretty, Nikki. I saw pictures of you before the drugs that sat on Stuart's nightstand and even now." He brushed his thumb over her cheek, "You're a very pretty girl."

She felt that her heart might jump out of her chest as he began to pick up their breakfast dishes. His tone and mannerism however was more like Stuart than a suitor. He meant it that way too, she could tell, but it didn't matter, she had planted that seed in her heart for him and could feel it growing. He was a good man, comparing him to others in her life, and there was no comparison. Jimmy couldn't even stand in the same room as him.

As he came back and picked up the remaining dishes off the table, she seemed to be staring off into space and it worried him for a minute that she might be fighting that inner demon.

"You ok?" he asked.

"What?" she looked up at him, "Oh…yes," she smiled, "I'm fine." She would get better, she felt it for the first time the certainty of it. He was wrong when he said she needed to want it more for herself, because she wanted it more for him, knowing that may be wrong, but it was working. She didn't want to disappoint him. The special relationship that had developed between them was more powerful than the inner voice that tried to sway her.

...

Nikki sat at an outside table at Rainbow Café and waited for Steve as he picked up their order. She was on her sixth day of being drug free and every second she spent with him was like therapy. The cravings would hit, sometimes hard, but they became more manageable being with him.

He smiled as he approached her, setting the tray down as she picked out her order.

"If Rainbow doesn't put some meat back on your bones, then nothing will," he joked. "Loco Moco is the best!"

"This is my favorite," Nikki said, taking the top off of her Styrofoam bowl that contained a layer of white rice, a cooked meat patty topped with an over easy egg and then all of it smothered with brown gravy, a Hawaiian local delicacy. "It smells so good."

Steve began to eat the similar meal; only his eggs were cooked over hard and were laid out on a plate that had double the portions of what she did. "I used to come here at least once a week when I was a kid. My dad loves this place too."

She dipped her fork into the bowl and began to cut up the meat with it, "Mr. McGarrett's a really good cook too. I'm going to miss it."

He looked across at her, resting his arms on the table. "I wanted to talk to you about one subject before I leave. Jimmy." He saw her cringed over that name. "You need to stay away from him, Nikki. I don't know what kind of relationship you two had, but he's not your friend."

She nodded, her eyes diverting away form his. "I know. He just used me." That was clear to her now.

"Did he ever hurt you Nikki?" he asked, his eyes narrowing as he anticipated her reply, hoping not, but if he had he felt he might make one last stop before leaving.

She stared at her food, recalling the time in his office when he'd had sex with her while she was high, realizing now he had only got her high for that purpose. It was borderline rape, but she was too embarrassed to tell Steve that, feeling guilty over not preventing it. "He hit me a couple of times, but that was it."

He wished now that he would have beaten the shit out of him in the parking lot. "Hey," he said to her. "I want you to tell me if he tries to contact you, all right."

She looked over at him and nodded.

"Promise me?"

"I promise. And I promise to stay away from him too."

"Ok," he smiled, changing the subject. "How do you feel about going to that place tomorrow we looked at?" he asked of the rehab place they had found.

Nikki shrugged, "Ok, I guess. I'm a little nervous. I think I'm doing ok though, don't you?"

He wiped his mouth off and looked over at her, "Yes, I think you're doing exceptional, but addiction is something you will live with for the rest of your life. They'll help you manage that on an everyday basis. I can't do that."

She nodded her understanding, but it wasn't so much going to the rehab center, as it was that she was going to miss him. She had tried to stop thinking of him that way, but it was difficult, once the feelings awoke inside of her it was hard to think of anything else. He was becoming more than just a friend of her brothers who showed up to help her; he had escalated to her hero, a larger than life man who became her ultimate crush.

"Will I ever see you again?" she asked.

He tilted his head and gave her a surprised glance, "Of course. I mean, I don't know when, but we'll stay in touch. I'd like to know how you're doing and if you need anything."

"You've already done enough, you and Mr. McGarrett."

"Can I ask you a personal question, Nikki?"

"Sure." She gave him her full attention.

"How did your mom die?"

It wasn't the question she would think he would ask, but she didn't mind it either. "She had a brain aneurysm when I was five."

"And your dad just kind of took over?"

She nodded, "I don't really remember too much about her death, but it seems life went on as normal, or I guess as normal as my dad could make it for us. He was a pretty cool dad. I miss him, especially now with all this going on." Her mood changed to depressed, feeling a craving slowly rising up in her, knowing how to ease the pain. "I think losing him was part of the reason I started doing drugs to begin with," she confessed. "It helps you know. I didn't think about it when I was high. It was weird, one minute he was there and the next he wasn't."

He understood that, dealing with something similar with his own mom. "That's all the more reason you need to go to that rehab place," he said to her. "I don't want losing Stuart to have the same effect on you."

She knew he was right. He was always right when it came to her well-being.

He couldn't help but dwell on her statement that her father made life after their mother's death as easy as possible for she and Stuart. It made him mindful and a little jealous. His father failed miserably in that department with he and Mary. "You were lucky to have such great support after your mom died. You're dad sounded a lot like Stuart."

She smiled over that, "Yes, he was, they were a lot alike, but you too," she said right back. "You're dad's awesome. You're pretty lucky too."

Steve huffed as he used his fork just a little too abruptly to cut the patty on his plate, "I wouldn't say lucky. My dad wasn't the…" he caught himself, feeling he was stepping over that line into his personal life. McGarrett men didn't talk about things so personal.

"He could have done better."

She looked at him peculiarly, "He seems like a really good dad."

"Yea well…" he left it that.

Nikki spotted the animosity without having to hear what he had to say. His agitation over the subject of his father was clear. It dawned on her then that after living with them for the past week that they really never interacted with each other, and the only laughter she heard in the house was when she was a part of it. They were both enjoyable to be around, but she couldn't recall a time that they ever held a conversation for longer than a couple of sentences.

It suddenly became clear to her that they didn't like each other, wondering how that was possible, they were exactly alike and in her opinion. They were both exceptional men.

She saw pictures, but never heard either of them speak about his mother.

"Where is your mom?" she asked him, figuring if he could ask why couldn't she.

He looked across at her as if that question had no right to be asked, not understanding the personal tragic events that conspired as a result of the answer to it.

She knew right away it was the wrong thing to ask. "I'm sorry. That's none of my business. I shouldn't have asked that. I'm sorry." She bent her head and began to eat her food, wishing she had just kept her mouth shut.

He'd scared her with that look; it was obvious in the way that she retreated from the conversation and from his attention. He was just caught off guard from the question. It hurt to think about, talking about it was completely off the table, but she deserved something.

"She died in a car accident when I was sixteen," he replied, but kept the tone dry as if informing her that was all he was going to tell her.

"Oh," she glanced up at him for just a second, and then focused back down at her bowl of food again. "I'm sorry."

"Yea," he said sadly, "me too."

She wasn't sure if that last reply was him acknowledging her similar loss as well, or if he was speaking of his own misfortune, and she wasn't about to ask. Her heart went out to him though because of it, not knowing the details, but it was painful nonetheless, maybe for both men, so much so that maybe it was what had somehow torn them apart.

It hurt her to see him like that, wishing she could do something physical to make him feel better, a simple hug perhaps, a kiss would be the icing on the cake, but despite the friendship that had grown between, they lived in different worlds and she was certain he would never see her as anything more than Stuart's little sister. She was a fool to think otherwise too, setting herself up for another failure wasn't what she needed right now, so the secret crush would remain just that, but it still felt good.

...

Steve sat at the kitchen table looking over Nikki's paperwork before he went to bed. He was packed up and ready to head out the next day, just making sure he hadn't missed anything for the rehab center she was going to the next day as well. It had been a long and exhausting two week trip but he felt strongly that she had made some serious headway and felt even more positive that she was on her way up and not back down again.

He heard footsteps thinking everyone was in bed already when he looked up, seeing his dad approaching him.

John came up to the table and set down a check next the paperwork.

Steve picked it up and read whom it was made out to and the dollar amount.

"What is this?" he asked, holding it as he looked up at him.

"I'll take care of Nikki's rehab cost."

Steve didn't see the check as a form of goodwill on his father's part; he saw it as a bribe for his forgiveness on the eve of him leaving, not ready to forgive him just yet. After hearing Nikki's testimony about her wonderful father, his resentment towards John had aggravated that wound again. He set the check down and slid it back over across the table towards him. "Thanks, but I'll take care of it."

John put his fingers on it and slid it back, "I want to."

"Why? It's not your problem."

"It wasn't yours either, but you wanted to help, so do I."

"Yes, it was my problem. Stuart was my brother. He asked me to do it so I did."

"So let me help out. I feel some responsibility now that she's been here. I would hope someone would do the same for Mary if something ever happened to me and I couldn't be there for her."

Steve let out a chuckle over that, ignoring the check and focused back on the paperwork.

"What?" John asked, irritated over the rude jab he felt he was always getting from him. "What was that little snicker about?"

Steve ignored him, which only escalated the situation.

"Steven!" John growled, "I'm talking to you! I would think you would give me the same respect you would one of your commanding officers."

Steve looked up at him with narrowed eyes, "Yes, Sir! My apologies, Sir!"

"You smartass!" John snarled at him. "You give your officer's more respect than you do your own Father."

"They earned it," he mumbled under his breath.

"If you got something to say boy," John yelled, "then say it to my face!"

Steve pushed the chair back and stood up, facing him, "They earned my respect," he repeated resentfully. "They didn't slide a check over and try to buy me. I'm not for sale, DAD!"

He'd reached his breaking point with his son and didn't even realize the moment had arrived until he reached up out of anger and slapped him across the cheek; the disrespect had gone on for far too many years.

Steve barely flinched from the blow, but his shock over it was what really knocked him over.

John was shocked as well but recovered far quicker than his son. "What do you want from me, Steve?! Huh? What?!" he bellowed.

Nikki came out of her room, hearing the yelling from below and stood at the top of the stairs, unable to see them but she heard them loud and clear.

"I want nothing!" Steve yelled back but his voice teetered on frustration and years of buried emotional anger that he blamed his father for. "I never asked you for anything and I've never wanted anything from you!"

"Oh yes you do!" John yelled back. "Just say what you want? Get it over with and let's settle this once and for all!"

"You're crazy old man!" he yelled. "You think you know so much. You think you're so smart. You don't know shit about me, or Mary! What do you care anyway! I'll be shipped off again tomorrow out of your hair, so stop trying to win father of the year with that fucking check," his voice raising, "because you'll never be it, EVER! You were a lousy fucking father!"

"And you're a pitiful excuse for a son!"

"Stop it!" Nikki screamed as she stood on the bottom step of the stairs. "Stop!" She came toward them, her face red with fury over the things they said to one another. "What is the matter with you?!" She pushed Steve aside, speaking to John first. "What if he leaves this house tomorrow and you never get to see him again!" She knew that possibility all too well, turning to Steve next and blasting him. "What if you leave and you never get to speak to your father again?!" She stepped back so she could see the both of them. "Are those really the last words you want to say to each other? Think about it! Is that really what you want to say?"

Both men stood their ground, hearing her loud and clear, assured the neighbors did as well, but still refused to look at one another, their stubbornness exposing yet another trait they shared.

John being the somewhat sensible of the two ran his hand over his hair, deciding it was enough. He turned and went up the stairs, closing the door to his room.

Nikki stood there with Steve as she stared at him, not seeing this side of him before, shocked that it even existed. He was visibly shaken from the incident but what he did next appalled her.

"Count your blessings Nikki. You were blessed with a good family."

Her face showed her disgust over that statement. "You're a fool! A stubborn pig headed fool! I've been here for seven days and you've never once said a nice word to your father and he's done nothing but bend over backwards to try and accommodate you and me!"

"You don't understand," he argued, "this goes back a long way."

"Oh boo hoo," she rolled her eyes, "All you ever tell me is how lucky I am while you still have your father right here in this house. If you're so pissed at him then why did you come back here anyway?"

"For you," he reminded her.

"Bullshit! You didn't have to come back here!" she pointed at the floor, referring to the house. "You came here because you wanted to see your dad. What is it that you want from him?" she asked, hearing John ask the same question. "What?!"

"Leave it be," Steve warned, giving her that same deathly stare that was made to intimidate the hell out of people, but Nikki didn't fear him. She knew he was harmless, at least with her.

"You don't even have anything to say," she snarled. "You're just pissed off for nothing!"

His anger ignited again that she was taking his side, wanting to prove to her that it wasn't for nothing. "He owes me!" Steve finally revealed at the top of his lungs. "He owes me an apology for taking away my family!"

"And God owes me one too," Nikki said calmly, "but I don't blame him. And how can you say he took away your family? You're family is still here. I don't know what happened between you, but I can't believe he would do anything to deliberately hurt you. There was a reason behind it but you are too stubborn and angry to see it."

"Why are you taking his side?" Steve asked, feeling betrayed by her.

"I'm taking your side you big dope," she huffed over his irrational behavior, "to help open your eyes. You have so much. You have everything that I lost and I just want you to see that. Can't you see that? One day you might be like me, do you really hate your father so much that you won't even care after he's gone?"

The word hate alarmed him. He didn't hate him. There was still enough there between them to keep him coming home, but it did startle him to think that one day he could come back to an empty house. He glanced up the stairs feeling for the first time the fear of loneliness of being without his father in this world. They weren't close by any means, but he was there, and knew he was loved, even though it hadn't been said for years. He didn't have much of that in his life and the one person that held the greatest amount for him he couldn't even forgive.

"I don't hate him," Steve replied quietly.

"Then why can't you forgive him for whatever he did? He's not a bad man."

He looked at her, and for the first time since meeting her she had the upper hand. She wasn't as naïve as he had thought. She was clean, sober and 100% accurate. She was the first person since he was sixteen years old who actually talked some sense into him.

"I'm going to bed," she announced as she walked toward the stairs. "I have a big day tomorrow. It's the beginning of a new life for me." She paused on the bottom step, "It could be for you too if you'd stop acting like he's out to get you. He's your Dad."

John sat on the edge of his bed hearing his son yell out in frustration, anger and desperation what he needed from him. He felt he had hit the lowest of lows, always knowing what it was that Steve wanted from him, but too…he couldn't even think of the right word that was causing his unwillingness and the prolonging of an apology. Fear perhaps he thought, stubbornness maybe too, or having to admit that what he had done was wrong. That brought tears to his eyes. After all these years he didn't want to admit it, but he had made a mistake in sending them away, a grave mistake.

He went to bed that night with a heavy heart.

...

John came down the stairs early the next morning seeing Steve's bags neatly arranged by the front door.

The Navy had made him an early riser but that morning they both were up right after sunset. It had been a long restless night for them, each having an agenda before his departure back to his unit.

John came in the kitchen not wanting to drag it out a second longer. He had already wasted far too much time to let another second go by without giving his only son what he so desperately needed and deserved.

"Steve," John said as he stood at the kitchen sink with his back to him. He turned and John was relieved not to see anger or bitterness on his face, on the contrary his expression was remorseful.

"Dad, about last night…"

He went to him as he leaned back against the counter. "Don't say anything Steve."

"I need to. I want to tell you…"

"No, Son. I want to say that I'm sorry."

"Me too, I shouldn't have…"

"No, Son," he stopped him again, putting his hands on his shoulders. "You're not hearing me." He wanted to be face to face when he made his amends, his voice soft and sincere, "I'm sorry, Steve. I'm so sorry." It felt good to say, hoping it gave Steve as much satisfaction.

Tears welled in his father's eyes and he knew then exactly what he was apologizing for.

John squeezed his shoulders as his voice broke, "I'm sorry, Son."

Steve stared at him, seeing the remorse that shown on his father as the first tear fell from his eyes. It was the first time he'd seen him cry since his mother's death, and before that, never. McGarrett men didn't show their emotions, yet here he was.

"I know I let you down," he began when Steve tried to turn away, feeling his own emotions getting the better of him but his father held firmly on to him. "I let you down. I took away your childhood."

"Dad stop," he winced, trying to hold back the years of pain that he wanted to turn into anger, but the emotions over it that he had buried surfaced, gripping a hold of him so tightly he could barely breathe. He reached out for the support of his father, grasping onto his arms that were still clutching his shoulders as it came crashing down on him, fighting with all he had to stop the madness but it just kept coming. He was so tired of being angry with him. It had consumed him in so many ways that he could scarcely remember what it felt like not to be angry, just wanting it to end.

"Its ok, Son," John said, giving him the permission to feel it. "I'm sorry for what I did to you."

Those words broke the seal and he fell forward, resting his head on his Dad's shoulder as the validation he'd been waiting for all this time came out in a flood of unexpected tears that had been suppressed for ten years.

John put his arms around him and held him as if he were a child, hearing the anguish consume his son that he only hoped and prayed would finally bring him some peace.

"I don't want to fight anymore," he said to him, feeling Steve shake his head and hearing a choked reply.

"Me either."

John held him a while longer and then pulled back so he could see him, resting a hand on the back of his neck as he kept his head bent, "Look at me, Son."

He did as he was told, weakened by the turn of events that had him mentally reverting back to an age when he trusted his father.

John gripped him by the neck and spoke clear and calmly, "I love you, Son. You're a good boy and you didn't deserve all this. Things are going to be different between you and me from now on; I'll make sure of it. Do you hear me Steve?"

They stood at the same height but Steve felt like a little boy compared to the figure that stood across from him. "Ok, Dad," he whimpered, wiping the back of his hand across his nose catching some tears that teetered on the end of it and then sniffed.

John reached over on the counter and picked up the dishtowel and pressed it against his face, playfully wiping it off like he used to do when he was little.

"Now blow," he joked as Steve began to laugh at the silliness of it.

He took the towel from him and cleared away the moisture from his eyes as he settled down. He looked across at his father who dried his own eyes and then smiled tenderly at him.

"I love you too, Dad," he confessed for the first time in ten years.

...

Nikki stood on the curb at the airport as John helped Steve pull his two duffel bags from the trunk of the Mercury.

She stared at him, trying to soak in every bit and piece she could while she still had the time. Her secret crush had matured after secretly witnessing what she had that morning between he and his father, seeing him in a whole new light that just made her love him all the more.

He set his bag down on the curb next to her and smiled, giving her his undivided attention. He was walking away from this trip with so much more than just a renewed relationship with his father, she had healed not only that, but somehow amongst the chaos of the past couple of weeks the turmoil he felt over Stuart's death was put to sleep as well. He felt Stuart smiling down at him over his persistence and following through for that last dying wish. It was a successful mission.

"I'm sorry I can't go with you," he apologized.

She knew he was speaking of her first day at the rehab place that they had picked out together. His flight left before her appointment to move in. "It's ok," she replied. In her eyes he could do no wrong.

He put a hand on her shoulder, "I'm proud of you Nikki, you fought against the odds and won."

She bent her head and blushed over his admiration.

"If you need anything, you promise you'll let me know, ok?"

She looked back up at him and nodded, "I will." He hadn't been further than a few feet from her and she began to feel the separation hit her as tears filled her eyes. "Thank you for all you did."

He put his arms around her and hugged her as she laid her head on his shoulder, finding that piece of comfort that had sustained her through the most challenging time of her life.

"I need to thank you too," he whispered to her. "You helped put Dumb and Dumber back together again." He smiled as she chuckled over that. Much to her dismay he released the hug but kept a gentle grip on her arms. "This has been a healing process for both of us."

She nodded wanting to say so much to him, but words seemed to evade her at the moment.

"Be smart," he said to her, "make good decisions. If you follow those rules, you'll be fine."

She nodded again but still said nothing, feeling her heart being torn in two as he went to his father and hugged him goodbye. They spoke briefly, most already being said that morning in the kitchen, but it was still a heartfelt moment between them and they embraced tightly one last time before he picked up both bags and said one last 'goodbye' to the both of them and then headed inside.

She stood there staring at him, feeling desperate to say something, anything that would sustain his thoughts about her while he was away.

"Wait!" she cried out and ran over to him, putting both arms around his chest and squeezed him tightly.

He dropped the bags and hugged her back with a wide grin.

"Please be careful. Be safe and make good decisions," she said to him as her voice quivered. "You have to be ok. You just have to be."

He pulled back and slid his hand into her blue tinted hair and caressed his thumb over her tear-streaked cheek. "We're both going to be just fine, Nikki. I promise." He kissed her tenderly on the cheek before letting go.

She may not have left him with anything, but he left her with a moment that would sustain her through any kind of uncertain turmoil that was

ahead of her, she just knew it.


	8. Chapter 8

**Part Two**

**Chapter Eight**

"Hey knucklehead, get in here."

Steve stopped in front of Danny's office and looked over in the direction he was being summoned with an irritated expression.

"Will you stop calling me that?"

Danny glanced up from his laptop for just a split second to respond before he focused back on the screen again. "Sure, whatever. Come look at this," he smiled proudly.

Steve knew full well the request for the unwelcomed nickname would be ignored, the same as the other three times he had asked. "What?" he asked irritably, coming around the desk to see the screen.

"Look at that? My kid is a genius." He pointed at the screen which held a picture of his daughter Gracie holding up a certificate that read '_Spelling Bee Winner of the Week_.'

All was forgotten as Steve smiled at the cute photo of the eight-year-old girl that he'd got to know over the past couple of years since he and Danny had partnered up to run the unique task force for the Governor of Hawaii.

"All right, Gracie," he replied enthusiastically. "Good for her! She is brilliant," he agreed as he walked toward the door. "She must take after Rachel."

He smiled brightly hearing a grunt from Danny's office as he returned to his own.

His picked up his pace hearing his phone ringing.

"McGarrett," he answered using just his last name. When he'd first got the job a little over two years before he'd answered Commander Steve McGarrett, and then it went to Commander McGarrett and now that he was comfortable in the job and guaranteed that whoever was calling on the other line were ones' assured he was going to answer, it was cut down to just one name.

"Yes, Ma'am," he said to the Governor. "We don't have any substantial leads yet, but we're working on it." He hated it when she called him directly and he didn't have specific details to offer up on a case. "We'll catch them, I promise you that. Yes, Ma'am, I will. Thank you."

He hung up and plopped down in the oversized leather chair behind his desk.

"Hey genius," he shouted out, "get in here." He flipped up his laptop and began pulling up their latest police file.

"I'm glad you finally recognized one of my finer qualities," Danny said, coming into his office.

Steve ignored the comment. "I just got a call from the Governor, she's pissed."

"Let me guess," Danny sulked as he sat down on Steve's matching leather couch. "The smash and grab cases."

He looked over at him, "Why haven't we solved this? I mean seriously. We've brought down drug dealers, prevented potential terrorist attacks, and we can't arrest a few thugs that are walking into pawnshops, smashing up the place and running out. C'mon! That's amateur shit!"

"I know, I know," Danny said passively, "calm down. We'll catch em', it's just a matter of time."

Steve picked up his phone and pressed one of the saved numbers amongst the list of ten.

"Kalani," he said into the receiver. "Steve McGarrett. I'd like…" he began and then a broad smile came across hip lips as he laughed. "Yes, Ma'am," he chuckled. "No Ma'am. I'm sure I'm not." He laughed again and then went into what he had originally called for. "I'm calling because I want to be informed next time dispatch gets a robbery that includes a smash and grab. The call to me should be before the one going out to officers, unless it's a hostage situation. Can that please be arranged?"

Danny watched as he smiled again and then laughed. He knew why Steve was making the call to dispatch, they both had been weary of the claim that there was no evidence left behind at any of the other robberies and wanted to get in there first hand before anything was disturbed. That was one thing they had in common; the understanding of the profession and how to catch bad guys when no one else could.

"Thank you, Kalani. As always I appreciate your help." He smiled and nodded, "Yes, Ma'am."

He set the receiver back down, shaking his head with a grin.

"What?" Danny chuckled, knowing Kalani as well. "Is she still trying to set you up with her niece?"

"No," Steve chuckled, "the niece is getting married and she was just informing me that I missed my opportunity and I should be more aware when chances of a lifetime come around like that."

Danny laughed over it as well. "Did you ever get a look at the niece?" he asked him.

"Nope, doesn't matter anyway, I'm married to you and this job," he joked.

"Don't flatter yourself. Besides, I consider this a tolerant slash destructive relationship."

"Really? How so?"

"I'm tolerant of all your destruction."

Steve laughed, "Boo hoo. You're making more money since I came around, better benefits and I've brought some excitement to your life. How is that bad?"

"More money to pay for more life insurance," Danny pointed out on his fingers, "more benefits to pay for the injuries you inflict on me…and excitement!" he practically choked on that word. "Running into the line of fire is not my idea of excitement."

"That was only once," Steve argued. "You exaggerate so much. What about you calling me a knucklehead, or a Neanderthal, or crazy, or a mental case or one of the many other nicknames you have for me?" he put his hand on his chest, "Don't you know how that makes me feel? It hurts Danny. I have feelings too you know. These eyes that can have a thousand yard death stare, as you call it, they can also show pain."

Danny stared at him and then busted out laughing. Steve followed suit just seconds later.

"Too much?" he said to him. "I should have stopped at Neanderthal and you might have believed me."

"Nah," Danny shook his head, getting up off the couch. "You're never going to change and neither are my nicknames, unless you miraculously turn into a human being overnight."

"See!" Steve called him out as he left his office, "That hurts man, deeply."

"I'll get you a tissue," Danny replied going back into his office.

Steve smiled, siting back down at his desk. His smile faded looking at the open case file of the latest case and being reminded of the Governor's call.

Normally she wouldn't be involved but the crooks were getting braver, hitting two in one week, and the press was hitting her, asking why her 'Task Force' wasn't getting the job done?

It started to make him look bad too and that didn't sit well with him at all.

"Chin!" Steve yelled out. "Kono!"

Danny showed at his door again. "What are you yelling about? They went home an hour ago."

Steve looked at him confused and then at his watch, ""Holy shit, its six o'clock." He looked back up at him, "What are you still doing here?"

"When was the last time that I left before you?" The puzzled look on Steve's face made him realize that he was just realizing the same thing. "Some detective you are."

Steve grunted, not really finding too much importance in it. "Do you want to go grab some chow?"

"Can't," Danny replied. "I'm taking Gracie out to dinner for her Spelling Bee."

Steve looked at his watch again, "It's getting late, you better hustle."

"I'm picking her up from cheer practice at six thirty. You're welcome to join us for dinner," he added.

"Nah," Steve declined, "you two go ahead." He didn't want to interrupt their father, daughter time knowing Danny didn't get very many of them. "I'll see you tomorrow."

...

Steve looked out the kitchen window as the sun set. It was a particularly beautiful one with vibrant colors that shown on the ocean that was as smooth as glass that night.

It made him mindful of how lucky he was to be living there, but it came at a price, his father's life. That's why he had come home, to solve the murder of his father. It was a successful mission and more had come out of it than he expected, a new job, and three partners that he trusted and relied on just as much as he had any of his Seal brothers.

His thoughts went to his father as they often did when he let his mind wander while in the house that he had grown up in. They were pleasant thoughts, seldom dwelling on the negative feelings that had plagued him for years before they repaired their relationship.

This week was particularly more difficult to handle than the rest. The anniversary of his death was approaching and a trip out to his grave was due.

He looked away from the window as the vibrant colors disappeared and darkness took its place. He finished the task of washing his dinner dishes and dried his hands on the dishtowel, neatly laying it over the sink.

He walked into the living room and plopped down on the couch, turning on the TV and searching the channels until he found a baseball game. He tucked his arm under his head while his thoughts drifted back and forth from the game to the smash and grab case, hoping a lead came up soon, because it was just getting ridiculous.

He sat up, feeling restless but not sure exactly why. Maybe it was this case he thought, but he'd had tough cases before and knew the best strategy was to just let it go and then bam, out of nowhere something he had overlooked would come to him. It had happened more than once and he began to rely on it as a problem solver.

He checked his watch and decided it was too early to got to bed and too late to go for a swim.

He glanced over at the garage door and grinned. Working on the Mercury always gave him piece of mind and it would cure the restlessness as well.

He lifted the hood and leaned over; trying to recall where he had left off the last time he'd worked on it.

"The carburetor," he mumbled, reaching over and taking the top off of it. He examined the inside and walked over to the workbench that stretched along the entire side of the garage and held every tool he would need; thanks to his Dad's collection over the years. Each one had a home and he was as meticulous at putting them away as his father had been, doing it more out of respect for him than doing it because he liked things orderly, a curse from being in the Navy for so long.

His mind drifted again to his father and an argument they had had over the car several years ago. It was insanely ridiculous and he could scarcely remember the details it was so absurd.

'_Too many wasted years,'_ he thought as he cleaned the item in his hand with a steel brush.

He suddenly stopped and looked up as another thought came to him, one that hadn't crossed his mind in sometime.

Nikki.

She was the reason why he and his dad had reconciled their relationship.

He wondered how she was and what she had been up to. They had written each other a couple of times after he had gone back to the Navy and she had gone to rehab. He knew she'd completed it successfully and even moved back into the house afterward with his dad until school started again and she could get back in the dorms.

His last contact with her had been a card she had sent after the funeral, stating how sorry she was for the loss and how thankful she was to the two of them for changing her life around. It was post marked from a town in Washington that he'd never heard of. He looked it up and discovered it was a suburb of Seattle, wondering what had brought her there.

He meant to write her back right away but the murder case of his father took priority, and after it was all said and done and he had finally got around to it, the letter came back with no forwarding address. He'd always meant to look her up, but for some reason or another it just never happened.

He made a mental note to rectify that. It was the fourth time he'd made that mental note but this time he'd do it for sure.

He felt justified that he'd successfully completed Stuart's final wish, not wanting to look her up because of that, but because she too had changed his life for the better.

...

Danny reached for his phone, knowing who it was by the ringtone, T.N.T. by AC/DC played until he pushed accept.

"What? I'm almost out the door," he said to Steve, grabbing his car keys off the table. He heard sirens in the background.

"I just got a call from dispatch, there was another smash and grab. They just got the 911 call and I'm on my way."

"How excited you must be," Danny joked. "What a great way to start the morning."

Steve swerved around a group of cars that had pulled over for him and then stepped on the gas again. "Ha, ha, not get your ass over there. Call Chin and Kono." He blurted out the address, turning down the street that he had given Danny.

"Got it. On my way."

Steve slowed down as he arrived at the same time as two other patrol cars. He got out of his truck with gun drawn making his way toward the store.

Just as he and Danny had predicted, the thieves had graduated from hitting pawnshops and were now going right to the source, actual Jewelry stores.

He was sure he'd get a lead now, there were going to be too many cameras and other local surveillance in this area not to catch something on video.

Steve motioned to the other four officers as they all met up, motioning with his arm for them to follow behind him as he got a closer look at the damaged store.

The glass front door and window were intact but the inside was clearly a broken mess, with glass shattered everywhere. He didn't expect them to still be there but never took chances and always assumed the worst.

As he got closer he could clearly see it was indeed vacant except for a woman standing amongst the glass.

"Show your hands!" he yelled out to her.

Nikki saw them coming, relieved beyond belief that help was there and so quickly too. She did as she was told, lifting her hands, not wanting them to assume she had anything to do with it.

"I'm the store manager," she yelled back with her hands raised to shoulder height. She trembled from the ordeal that happened so fast she could barely remember anything that had happened. She looked down trying to find a path out of there amongst the glass when she looked up again and felt her heart skip at the sight of Steve coming in the shop with his gun pointed at her and then to the surrounding area.

He felt the danger was gone and holstered his gun, looking over his shoulder to the other officers, "Stay out until forensics gets here. I want this place untouched."

"Hi!" Nikki said to him with a wide grin, still reeling over the fact that he was standing twenty feet away from her. The crush that she thought had vanished from years earlier suddenly reappeared. Maybe it was because he was like a night in shinning armor there to save her once again, but what got her heart racing the fastest was that he was even better looking now than he was five years before.

"Hi," Steve replied to her, "are you hurt?" He hadn't made definite eye contact yet with the woman, scanning his surroundings looking for evidence amongst the broken glass.

"No. I don't think so," she looked down the emerald green dress she had on and saw a trickle of blood running down her calf and into the high heels she had on. "Well not really."

Steve looked up at her then and was caught off guard by the strikingly beautiful woman that had been talking to him. Her sun kissed blond hair hung in long strands down around her shoulders. Her features were delicate and her skin was like satin, all the way down to her fingers and long tanned legs.

"I'm not sure how to get out of here thought," she said to him.

"Don't move!" he held his hands up, "There's glass everywhere." He knew in those high heels she had on that walking out of there was going to be impossible, at least not without getting cut or tripping.

She smiled as he came closer, stepping over shards of broken glass to get to her. She felt slightly awkward over the highly unexpected reunion playing out this way.

"Funny meeting like this, huh?" she said to him.

He looked at her thinking it was a joke, chuckling over it, wondering if it was a borderline flirtatious comment, hoping so. "Circumstances could be better, like maybe a couple of beers between us," he smiled at her, "but this is good too." He was finally within reach of her and stuck his hand out. "I'm Commander McGarrett, but you can call me Steve." He glanced down at her vacant ring finger, pleased to see it that way.

Nikki stared at him in shock. He had no idea who she was. It stung a little at first but then she found it kind of charming too, especially the fact that he was flirting with her. Had she really changed all that much?

"Let me see," Steve said as he pondered their situation. He looked up at her and shrugged, "I think the only way you're going to get out of here is if I carry you. Do you have a problem with that?"

Nikki's smile widened over that prospect, and the fact that he was completely clueless as to her identity, wondering if she should say something, but she was actually enjoying it too much. "No, I don't mind you carrying me, as long as it's not over your shoulder," she teased him.

Steve laughed, "No, I won't do that." She had a sense of humor, to him that was almost as impressive as her good looks.

"Well then I guess it's ok."

He moved his arms in position and bent over just slightly and then hesitated, considering the mid-length dress she had on. "Hmm, let's see," he said and then glanced up at her, "I'm just going to scoop you up, ok?"

"Ok," Nikki replied, "one sec." She smoothed her hands down the dress and held it in place against her body so it wouldn't ride up.

"Good thinking," he said bending over again. "Just put your arm around my neck."

He did just as he had said and easily scooped her up as she wrapped one arm around his neck and held the dress down with the other. It wouldn't have mattered anyway she thought, he was a gentleman and kept his eyes diverted from looking directly down at her. Instead he concentrated on taking the shortest path without disturbing the crime scene, but first and foremost, getting her out safely. She was impressed by his strength of shifting her from one side to the other so he could see his path, doing it as if she were as light as a feather.

"You doing ok?" he asked her as they neared the front door.

"I think I'm in perfectly good hands."

He glanced at her then, their faces close due to the situation at hand. "To protect and to serve," he quoted the Police motto.

Another officer held the door open for him as he came out still holding her as he walked over by his truck and let go of her legs but still held firmly around her waist until he was sure she had her footing and then let go of her.

"Hey," he said noticing the blood on her leg, "you're bleeding!"

Nikki shifted her leg and looked at the small cut, "It's nothing."

He reached inside his truck in the glove compartment for a couple of napkins he kept in there.

He tore off a small piece and squatted down, placing it over the tiny wound. '_These legs go on forever,'_ he thought, enjoying the moment more than he should have.

She blushed over his attentiveness, recalling it from years before as well. "Thank you."

He stood back up, "You're welcome. So…" he began completely smitten over her, "you're the store manager?" he asked, "I guess you're the one I should be talking to then. Are you feeling up to answering a few questions?" She seemed ok, and not too shaken up over the ordeal, wanting to get what he could while it was still fresh in her mind.

Nikki chuckled over the fact that he still hadn't caught on, "Sure, Steve."

He liked the way she said that. "Ok, let's start with your name."

Nikki shook her head at him with a teasing grin, "You really have no idea who I am, do you?"

Steve tilted his head in utter confusion over that question, narrowing his eyes as he gave her face the once over. "No, should I?"

"You don't remember me?"

He smiled, "Remember you? I'm pretty sure we've never met before, because I know for a fact I would remember you."

Nikki laughed, deciding to come clean with him. "It's me, Steve. Nicole. Nicole Riley. Stuart's little sister." She held still as he came into the light. He looked at her even more confused and then all at once it hit him as his mouth dropped open.

"Nikki?!"

She laughed over his shocked expression. "No one's called me Nikki in a long time, but yes, it's me."

"Oh my God," he whispered, dumbfounded over that revelation. "I can't believe that's you. You look so…" he paused, searching for the right words to explain the difference between the blue haired, mousy girl he had helped get over heroin to the beautiful woman standing before him. "It's just that you…"

"Look different?" she chuckled. "I'm getting that impression."

"Well…I mean, yes you look very different." He quickly pointed out the obvious, "Better! You look great!"

She bent her head shyly, "Thank you."

He leaned in and then hesitated but she must have sensed him wanting to hug her because she awkwardly leaned in as well. They produced a hug that was neither warm nor satisfying, but it fit right in with the weird atmosphere that had developed over the unusual reunion.

"How have you been?" he asked her, the sincerity in his voice clear, but before she could answer he blurted out something that surprised her. "Hey, you know what?" he pointed at her. "I just remembered something. I was just thinking about you last night."

The smile on Nikki's face widened over that, "You were?"

"Yes. I was working on my Dad's car and I don't know why but you popped into my head. I made a mental note to look you up," he held his hands out as if showing her off, "but here you are! What a weird coincidence."

"That is odd, but hey, you know what, its long overdue."

He nodded in agreement, "Yes it is." He heard a familiar sound and looked over his shoulder seeing Danny pull up in the Camaro, ignoring it and the crime scene he was so adamant about researching. "So, how are you?"

"I'm good," she replied. "I've been managing this store for about a year now."

"I wrote you a letter when you were in the Seattle area but it came back with an unknown forwarding address."

She was surprised but tickled that he had written her, "Wow, no, I didn't get it. I only lived in Seattle for a while. I didn't like it too much. It was nice and all, but I missed the beach and the sunshine."

"What do we got?" Danny said as he approached them, smiling at the pretty girl.

"Danny," Steve said just a little to enthusiastic, which got a peculiar look from him. "This is my partner Danny Williams," he said to Nikki. "Danny, this is Nikki Riley." He quickly backtracked, "Or do you like Nicole now?"

Nikki chuckled over his interest to please her. "No, Nikki's fine." She reached her hand across to Danny, "It's nice to meet you."

"Good to meet you too," he replied accepting the gesture. "Do you two know each other?" he wondered if she were an ex-girlfriend of Steve's which would explain the odd behavior from him.

"Yes," Nikki began and looked at Steve for guidance, hoping he wouldn't divulge her past as the true meaning behind how they knew each other.

"I knew Nikki's brother Stuart. He was a Seal brother of mine. She and I met when I was here about five years ago." He left it at that.

"Interesting," Danny said, but not really finding it all that interesting at all, but Steve obviously did. "So…you are here now because…you robbed the store?" he joked.

Nikki laughed while Steve looked at him irritably.

"She's the store manager," he replied testily.

"It was a joke, Steve, settle down," Danny replied passively, patting his arm. He focused on Nikki, wanting answers to this case just as much as Steve did. "Where you in the store when the robbery took place?"

"Yes, I was behind the counter right after unlocking the doors and three men came in…" she paused and corrected herself, "actually I shouldn't say that. It could have been three women. They were all dressed in black from head to toe. They had long rubber gloves on that went up past their elbows," she demonstrated on her arm.

"So they wouldn't leave any traces of DNA if cut," Steve explained. "How long were they there?"

Nikki shook her head, "Honestly, it felt like an hour, but in reality they couldn't have been there more than about one minute. It happened so fast," her voice trailed off, reliving the frightening scene that had vanished from her thoughts since running into Steve, but now it was creeping back in again as she re-lived it. "They came in through the front door and never said a word, as if it were choreographed down to the second. They knew exactly which cases to hit and each had their own section, hitting every single one and practically clearing the place out."

"Sounds like they've been there before if they know the layout that well," Danny suggested. "Do you have cameras in the store?"

"Yes, of course, but the recordings are not physically in the store. It's through a security company. They're the ones that called 911 too." She looked sheepishly between them, "I just kind of stood there frozen to the floor," she smiled at Steve, "until you got there."

He gently put a hand on her shoulder for comfort, "It's normal to feel traumatized after something like that, most people actually faint afterward, you held it together pretty well. Like brother, like sister, huh," he grinned.

Nikki smiled brightly over that comparison, "If it were Stuart, he would have taken them all down."

"Probably," Steve chuckled.

She stood off to the side as he conversed with Danny about the case, struggling not to stare at him but finding her eyes drifting that way uncontrollably. He was just the same as he was five years before. He hadn't changed except for his looks, which were also still off the charts as far as she was concerned.  
"So what do think?" Danny asked.

Steve glanced over his shoulder and smiled at Nikki, before answering Danny's question. "I can't believe that's the same girl that I knew five years ago. I didn't even recognize her. She looks great!" he looked again really quick, "She looks good doesn't she?"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Danny blurted out. "I'm not talking about the girl, I'm talking about the case! And how do I know if she looks different than she did five years ago? Five years ago I was a happy cop living in New Jersey with my wife and kid. Now I got sand everywhere, all the time!"

"Will you quit complaining about Hawaii? You live in paradise, embrace it."

"Paradise," he huffed, "I'm trapped in a no season change hell. Paradise," he mumbled again and looked up seeing Steve staring at him.

"Are you done? I want to question Nikki some more while her memory is still fresh."

Danny laughed, "The only question you want to ask her is if she'll have dinner with you?"

"I can't ask her out?" he whispered irritably, hoping she didn't hear that.

"Why not? You're clearly hung up on her. I mean seriously," he pointed at his mouth, "you got a little bit of drool right there from just talking about her."

Steve shook his head irritably over his teasing, "Whatever man. She's the little sister of a friend." He was pretty sure she saw him the same way, besides, it didn't matter whether or not he was attracted to the woman in the store, once he found out it was Nikki, it was as if all bets were off. She suddenly reverted back to Stuart's little sister, even though he had a very difficult time seeing that young girl in the woman standing there before him.

"You're right, she's clearly too young for you," Danny chuckled as he walked off. "I'm going to check out the store and get a hold of the security company and have them send over what they got. You go question the witness. Maybe you can buy her an ice cream cone when she's all done."

Steve rolled his eyes as he turned back toward Nikki, thinking to himself as he walked toward her. '_She's about what_…' he counted in his head, '_twenty six now. Damn, that's not young. The last time I saw her she was young, but not now.' _He thought about her back then with her blue hair and skinny-framed body from doing the drugs. There was no attraction whatsoever back then, it would have just been creepy in his opinion. But the years and recovery had been good to her, very good. '_Maybe_,' he thought, but before he could even consider the idea he heard Stuart's voice in his head that had been quiet for so many years, now come alive again. "_Watch over my little sister_."

He had done just that, and thought if the roles were reversed how he would feel if Stuart had thought about Mary the same way he was now thinking about Nikki. He felt a revolting feeling in the pit of his stomach over that, deciding then and there that it would still be creepy. He buried the attraction to her, not finding it all that difficult.

He had become a master at denying his own feelings over the years.

...

Nikki sat in the passenger side of Steve's truck with the door open and watched from afar as his team, which included two more that she had been introduced to, worked together to unscramble any clues that were left behind during the robbery. He had come over a couple of times to talk to her, once with various questions about her daily routine in opening the store and the second time just to check on her to make sure she was doing all right. She wondered if it was a professional inquiry or one that he asked because he was generally concerned, hoping for the latter of the two.

It was clear as she watched him intently that he was in charge of the crime scene. He pointed and ordered people around, but not in a demanding military way, he had clearly made the jump from soldier to civilian and knew how to give orders in a respectful way. They all listened to him without hesitation. She found it pleasurable to watch and also a little sexy too. His commanding presence along with his good looks was igniting that schoolgirl crush in to a full-blown erotic fantasy on behalf of the woman she was now.

'_What are my chances,'_ she thought to herself. '_Does he see me the same way?'_

He had clearly been flirting with her before he knew who she was, that was crystal clear. She wasn't naïve' to the flirtatious advances of men, and Steve defiantly had been one of them, up until she had revealed her true identity, then he suddenly changed.

She sighed heavily, feeling like that young girl again who looked up to him five years before. She had no chance of any kind of romantic liaison with him back then, but what about now? The spark was there, she'd seen it, hoping he'd forgo the chivalry of playing the big brother and see her for who she presently was, a woman who wanted to test the waters that he was swimming in.

Her attention was diverted by one of his team members coming towards her. The woman couldn't have been much older than she was. She was of Hawaiian decent that was clear, and she was beautiful, physically fit and smart enough to work on Steve's team. It made her wonder if this was the type of woman she had to compete with.

"Hi, Nikki," Kono said as she came up to the passenger door. "Steve wanted me to find out if you had a regular schedule of deliveries or were they random?"

"Random," Nikki replied. "The owners, Patricia and John Franklin do a lot of traveling and buying internationally. I'm always aware a few days ahead of time when a shipment will be coming in and what it consists of."

"When was the last one?"

"A week ago. Nothing special about it though."

"What do you mean by that?"

Nikki shrugged, "It had a group of smaller rocks and a couple that were over two carat, but that's nothing unusual."

"Who accepts the deliveries?"

"I do. I inspect the stones for clarity, photograph them and then pass them over to Haimi."

"Haimi?" Kono asked.

"He's the jewelry cutter. Haimi Mathews. He's been with the Franklin's for about thirty years."

"How would you describe his character?"

Nikki's eyes lit up over that question in surprise, "Haimi?!" she chuckled. "How would I describe his character?" she repeated the question as if thinking out loud. "Well, let's start off by saying, he and his wife adopted and raised five wonderful kids. He volunteers at the homeless shelter every Thursday night and the weekend is strictly for his grandkids. In my opinion he's a very stand up guy. Plus, he's one of the nicest people I've ever met, and gifted when it comes to jewelry design."

Kono smiled, "Ok, got it. So you would vouch for him?"

Nikki nodded, "Yes, very much so."

"Is there anyone else that accepts the delivery's besides you?"

"No."

"Do you ever talk about your job to other people?"

Nikki shrugged nonchalantly, "Well, I guess, but not about detailed and private matters such as a delivery."

"Are you the only one that knows the security code to open and close the store?"

"No, Haimi and Justin Cobb have the codes as well. Justin is a salesman. He opens and closes on my days off."

"Tell me about Justin?"

"Married, two small kids, another on the way. He and his family moved here from the mainland about a year ago wanting to live the Hawaiian lifestyle. Nice people."

"Hmm," Kono nodded, not seeing any relation so far as it being an inside job. "How have sales been lately?"

"Fine. We've been moving lot's of inventory."

"Have you noticed any unusual customer's lately? Someone that has been frequenting the store or anyone that you never noticed before as unusual but now you sense a red flag?"

Nikki thought about it for a second but then shook her head, "No, not that I can think of off the top of my head."

"How long have you worked here?" Kono asked her.

"A little over a year."

"Where did you work before this?"

"I was a bank teller in the Seattle area on the mainland. I moved back home about a year ago."

"How did you get this job? Do you know the Franklin's personally, or did you apply for it?"

Nikki looked at her puzzled for a second over the line of questions that were becoming more focused on her now, until she realized that she was being interrogated herself, wondering then if Steve sent her over instead of coming himself, not wanting to be the one to do the interrogating.

"I applied for it. The previous manager retired. I hired Justin shortly after I took the job. I'd never met him before that." She smiled at Kono. "I understand the line of questioning and the fact that everyone is a suspect. If you'd like me to take a lie-detector test, I will. I have nothing to hide. I like the Franklin's very much and the people I work with. I don't know why they singled us out," she sighed, "I wish I could give you better answers. I want them caught as much as you do."

Kono felt she'd got what she needed from her and also felt confident that she was telling the truth, knowing Steve would be happy about that too, considering he personally knew her. "Ok, thank you." She turned to leave and paused, "Oh one other thing. Where are the Franklin's now?"

"In Germany," Nikki replied. "I really need to let them know what's going on too. When do you think I'll be able to go back in the store to get my belongings?"

"I'll get them for you. Is it just a purse?"

"Yes. It's a brown backpack one in the cupboard just behind the computer. Thank you."

"No problem. Be right back."

Kono made her way back to the store and went inside.

"So," Steve said as he approached her. "What did you get?"

Kono went over word for word and then shook her head, "I think we can rule her out and the other employee's." She went behind the counter and opened a cupboard and then another one, pulling out the purse.

"What's that?" Danny asked.

"Her purse. She needs her phone to contact the owners about what's going on."

Danny held his hand out, "Let me see it first."

"What for?" Steve abruptly asked.

"What do you mean what for? It's evidence until it leaves this building. I want to see it."

Kono went to hand it to him, not thinking anything of it when Steve intercepted it.

"Kono said she's not a suspect and I trust her word."

"Ok," Danny replied, "but I still would like to get a look at her phone. It's standard protocol."

"She didn't have anything to do with it. It's an invasion of privacy."

"Invasion of," Danny burst out laughing. "Coming from the guy who busts down doors and hangs people off of buildings and you think this is an invasion of privacy?"

Steve growled and opened the purse, searching through it until he saw her phone at the bottom. He pushed the bottom button as it lit up the screen showing the number pad. He held it out for Danny to see.

"She has a pass code. I'll get it from her and look, ok?!"

He tucked the purse under his arm and turned to leave when Danny called out to him. "Yea, ok. Sure, you do that." He huffed as he looked over at Chin and Kono, "We'll never see that purse again."

Chin chuckled over the antics between the two of them that had become the norm.

Nikki sat up in the seat and smoothed down the front of her dress as she saw him approaching her with her purse in his hand.

"Here you go," he said, handing it out to her.

She smiled thankfully, "Thank you. I want to call the Franklin's and let them know what's happening. Did you find anything? Do you have any idea who did this?"

Steve shook his head, "No, not yet. But we'll catch them, don't worry about that."

"I'm not," she grinned. "I believe you will."

He liked that vote of confidence from her. "We'll be a while in the store if you want to go home and then come back. I could take you."

Nikki pointed toward her Honda in the parking lot. "I have my car, but I think I'd better stay. I need to clean up the mess and I'm sure you'll want an inventory of what was taken."

"Right, um, yes, we will." He was a little embarrassed that he hadn't asked that of her yet, but somehow since meeting her again he was having a hard time keeping his head on the job. He sent Kono out to talk to her, not sure why but he didn't want Nikki to think that he considered her a suspect, because he didn't. He had no substantial proof of that, but he did have a gut feeling that she was innocent, and he always relied on his gut instincts. "If you think of anything else you'll tell me, right?"

She sensed that he felt uneasy, hoping he didn't think of her as a suspect.

"Steve," she said, getting his attention as he looked over at her again. "I don't know who would have done this. The Franklin's are good people. They didn't deserve it. If I knew anything I would tell you."

"I know that Nikki. You're not a suspect. I assure you of that." That uneasiness he felt around her vanished and was replaced with something new as she smiled over his declaration that she was indeed innocent in his eyes. He liked the feeling that he had put that beautiful smile on her face, it was uplifting; yet that voice in his head quickly distinguished it, reminding him who she was.

"Why don't you make your calls that you need to and I'll let you know when were done."

"Ok, thank you." He went to walk away when she took a leap of faith. "Hey Steve."

"Yea," he turned around standing a few feet away from the opened passenger door.

"Do you think maybe…" she hesitated but was already halfway there, deciding what the hell. "Do you think maybe we could get together and catch up? I mean in a non-police, victim kind of way. Maybe catch dinner or a drink or something?"

That had been on his mind in the very beginning, before she had become Nikki, little sister of Stuart. He had no intentions of crossing that line, but he had been wanting to reach out to her even before this odd coincidence of a meeting took place, yet her invitation sounded to him more like a date. He thought it better to keep it innocent and used a reply that would confirm that to her, not wanting to give her any mixed signals. "Sure. Ok, I'll a…I'll call you when all this has settled down and we'll set something up."

He was neither charming nor encouraging in his reply. It was clear to her that he didn't want to see her in a romantic way, or maybe at all for that matter.

She watched him walk away, confused over the mixed signals that she got from him, or perhaps she thought dismally, there were no signals at all, only ones she had imagined she heard, hoping he felt the same way, but it was clear to her by his callous yet friendly reply that he had no intention of seeing her romantically.

She let out a depressing sigh and rolled her eyes over her forwardness, feeling embarrassed now over suggesting what she had. She felt like a fool, not sure she even wanted him to call now, but if he did, it didn't matter the reason, she'd jump at the chance to see him again.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

Nikki reached across the seat in her car and picked up the bouquet of flowers sitting on the passenger side. She got out and made her way across the gravel driveway and stepped on the soft manicured grass, making her way over to John McGarrett's grave.

The first time she had come she'd worn high heels, dressing up for the occasion, but now she wore flats, but still had on a dress out of respect for the place and for the man she was visiting.

She knew exactly where he was amongst the row of headstones, not needing to guess, having been there several times before, but today was the anniversary of his death so the flowers she carried were more plentiful.

She reminisced about the time she knew him and how he had taken her in when she had no place to go. He had saved her life and she would forever be grateful and blessed that she had known him.

By the time she made it to the grave she had to wipe away tears that had already gathered in her eyes.

"Hi Mr. McGarrett," she said to him as she knelt down in the grass. "It's a beautiful day." She undid the rubber band that held the bouquet together and spread them out across the bottom of the headstone until there was no vacant spot left. "That's pretty."

She sat back on her heals, admiring the colorful display.

"You aren't going to believe what happened," she said. "I ran into Steve after the jewelry store that I work at got robbed. Crazy huh?" She smiled over the memory of it. "He didn't even recognize me." She laughed. "He had no idea who I was. I had to tell him that it was me, Nikki." Her smiled faded some, "He was shocked, but I think he was happy to see me. He looked good, Mr. McGarrett. He looked really good and he seems happy. He has good people around him too. You'd be just as proud of him today as mush as you were back then. He's a good man. He's a lot like you in so many ways. Yes, I think you'd be very proud." She smiled again, "I had a crush on him back then. And I still do," she bent her head slightly and blushed as if he were sitting across from her and she had just confessed her love for his son. "But I don't think he sees me that way. I made a fool of myself Mr. McGarrett." She rolled her eyes, "I got bold, just like you always told me to be, and I asked him out." She blew out a long breath, "He said ok, and that he'd call me but that was five days ago." she sighed again, "I don't think he's going to call. He hasn't even talked to me since the robbery. He has other people call me. I think he's avoiding me." She shrugged, "Oh well. It's funny that you of all people told me there were lots of fish in the sea when it came to boys. Not to settle for one that said they would be nice to me, but settle for the ones that were. I never forgot that. You always had good advice." She felt her heart ache, "I sure miss you Mr. McGarrett, just as much as I miss my own father."

She sat for a few more minutes before she finally stood up, wiping the grass from her bare legs.

"I'll see you soon." She turned to leave and ran smack dead center into Steve.

He caught her by both arms as she stumbled, holding her firmly until she caught her balance.

"Whoa," he chuckled, "you alright? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sneak up on you like that."

"Yes, I'm fine, I didn't know you were there." Her body froze as she recalled the things she had said out loud, praying that he hadn't heard her speaking about him. She backed up away from him. "How long were you standing there?"

"Not long. Just a couple of seconds." He was still a little shocked to see her there.

She was happy to hear that he had just walked up. Once the shock of seeing him wore off and she got a good look at him, those feelings of desire came rushing to the surface again. He was freshly shaven and had on a dark blue dress shirt and black slacks. He'd dressed for the occasion, the same as she. A soft breeze came from behind him and she caught a hint of his cologne that smelled just as masculine as he looked.

"I didn't know that you came here," Steve said, not able to tear his eyes away from her.

"I come here sometimes," Nikki replied. "I missed his funeral. I was in Seattle, but when I moved back I came and now every once in a while I like to visit him…and today being the anniversary of his death. I had to come."

He looked at the gravestone.

"The flowers?" he asked with a fascinated expression. "You're the one that leaves the flowers?" He'd seen them on several occasions, mostly wilted by then, but they were there more times than not when he visited.

"Yes. I bring flowers."

He couldn't believe she was there. He'd been doing his damnedest over the past couple of days to get her out of his head and now here she was, standing on what he considered hallow ground. She kept popping into his life at the most unexpected times.

There was an awkward silence as he stared at her. Nikki took it as his way of perhaps telling her that she was trespassing on his time with his father.

"I'll leave you alone." She walked past him when he finally spoke to her.

"I'm sorry I didn't call. I was planning on it. I've just been tied up with the case," he lied, only not about wanting to call her, he really did, but the thoughts that were going through his mind about her were confusing. He wanted to picture her like he did Mary, but when she would pop into his head; it wasn't in a way that he would ever picture his little sister. All he could see was the woman standing amongst the shattered glass and how those first glances between them about knocked him cold.

He didn't want to think of her that way, almost ashamed and disgusted with himself that he did. Instead he avoided her, hoping that would solve the problem, but now here she was visiting his father's grave and he finally had a face to go with the anonymous person that left the flowers, only never imagining the mysterious person would be that beautiful or that girl. Now he had a whole new set of thoughts about her that were going to torture him. His respect for her just went through the roof.

"I know you've been busy," Nikki said, letting him off the hook. "I understand. I do Steve. It's ok." She glanced back at the grave. "I'll leave you alone to visit with your father. Thank you for all the hard work you've been doing on the robbery. I know the Franklin's are grateful as well." She smiled at him one last time. "I'll see ya around."

She started back to her car as he watched her go. He heard a voice in his head urging him not to let her walk away. Before he could untangle the repercussion of that action he heard his own voice calling out to her.

"Hey Nikki. Do you want to meet up in about an hour and we could do that catching up?"

She stopped and closed her eyes as a wide grin spread across her face. She tried to tone it down as she turned to face him but found it difficult.

"Sure. Where?"

"Have you ever been to Hunan's?"

Her eyes lit up, "In Chinatown, off of Maunakea?"

Steve smiled, "Yea, that's it."

"I'll see you there in an hour then, and we'll…catch up."

...

Nikki didn't want to be the first one there and make a fool of herself again by appearing to be too eager for the get-together, so she waited across the street for forty-five minutes until he entered the establishment and then she made her arrival.

Her stomach was in knots and her heart pounded in her ears as she walked in. The restaurant was small so there was no issue of having to search him out. He sat at a table facing the door and acknowledged her with a smile and slight head toss.

'_Look at those legs,_' was the first thought that popped into his head as she walked toward him. '_Stop!_' was the second thought. He rubbed his hands on his thighs, drying off the sweat that had accumulated there wishing the waitress would hurry up and bring them some water because his mouth was as dry as the Afghan desert. Why did he suggest this? Was he insane? Maybe Danny was right, he thought amusingly, and he was crazy.

"Hi Nikki." He stood up to greet her, putting a hand on the back of the chair that would be hers.

"Hi Steve. I'm glad you suggested this place. I haven't been here in a long time. I love it though." She could tell he liked that reply as he pulled the chair out for her and then sat back down himself.

She was impressed by that simple gesture, it showed respect, something that his father John had told her that she shouldn't have to demand from a man, they should show it. It was clear that Steve was his father's son.

"I like it too. They have good food."

Just as she got settled an older Chinese woman came to the table and gave them menus.

"You want drink?" she asked with a pleasant smile that showed two missing front teeth.

Steve looked over at Nikki, "Have you ever had the Chinese beer they sell here?"

"No, but I'm game if you are."

He looked up at the woman, "We'll have two bottles of Tsingtao please."

She nodded and walked away.

He picked up the laminated menu with one hand and began to scan over the items. "So what's your favorite dish here?"

She sat forward with her crossed arms resting on the table and looked over at him with a cunning smile. "Have you ever had the pigs ears?"

Steve's eyes moved from the menu to her, seeing that question as more of a dare. "I'm game, then you have to try the spicy lamb."

"Deal. Fried rice, not white?"

"And lot's of it."

They both set their menus down pleased over the mutual choices as the Chinese woman returned with the beer.

Steve ordered the food for both of them and then picked up his bottle leaning it over in her direction. "It's good to see you again, Nikki."

"You too," she replied, tapping her bottle against his.

She went to take a drink when he suddenly reached across and grabbed her hand.

"Nikki! Is it ok if you drink? I mean…" he quickly let go of her hand, "you know from what happened before. Jesus I'm sorry. I shouldn't have grabbed you like that and I should have thought about that before I offered you a drink. I'm sorry!"

"Steve," she chuckled over his obvious distraught state, "it's fine. I'm not an alcoholic. I rarely drink. Just don't put a needle full of heroine in front of me and I'll be ok," she joked. The painful look on his face made it clear to her that he didn't think it was a funny joke. She reached over and put her hand on his wrist, "Really, I'm fine. I'd never do that again. Ever! Not ever. I have absolutely no desire to go back to that life. It scares me to even think about it."

He smiled easily over that. "You look good, Nikki. You should know that. You look really good."

She pulled her hand back and blushed over his compliment. "Thank you. I feel good."

"Well it shows."

"Thanks to you, and your Dad I made it through."

"We were just there for support, it was you that…"

"Don't try and make it sound like it was all me." She intercepted his next words before he had a chance to get them out. "Your dad was the same way. He always tried to make it sound like it was all me, but that's not true. I never would have made it those first few days if you hadn't been there to stop me from running away. And I don't think I would have survived after rehab either if your dad hadn't given me a place to stay. You both saved my life. I don't even want to think where I would be right now if it wasn't for you two."

He didn't feel that way, but he didn't argue with her either because she obviously did. In a way it made him feel good that she thought of him that way, so he let it be.

"I knew you went back to my dad's house after rehab, but I thought it was only for a couple of weeks."

"It was supposed to be," she explained, "but I couldn't get back in the dorms until the next year so he let me stay over the summer." She smiled over the memory of it. "He was really good to me. I tried to stay out of his way, but I think he liked having me there too. He even went to meetings with me after I got out of rehab as a support."

"I didn't know that," Steve said amazed, but not really surprised all that much. He could see his dad doing that.

Nikki nodded, "He was wonderful. He even came to my college graduation. The last time I saw him was when he drove me to the airport when I moved to Seattle." She remembered the warm embrace and words of encouragement that he gave her, feeling tears sting her eyes over the memory of it. "I miss him. It was horrible what happened to him. It broke my heart."

The sadness that overcame her reached across and touched him as well, feeling the same loss. "I miss him too. I wasted too much time being angry at him."

"Don't say that, Steve." She reached over and put her hand on his, "He loved you so much, you and Mary. He talked about you all the time. He was so proud of you."

He didn't know how badly he needed to hear that until he did. It helped heal some of the guilt he'd been carrying around. "I think if it wasn't for you we never would have settled the bad blood between us. You brought us back together Nikki. I have you to thank for that." He in turn held her hand now that had been placed over top of his. "You helped open my stubborn pig headed eyes to what I was missing. So thank you."

It was a nice moment between them that seemed to break the ice. The nervous tension that had plagued her before the meeting vanished. He had a way like his father of making her feel…at home.

He was glad now that they had met up. She had grown up in more ways than one. He didn't even realize he was still holding her hand until the waitress came with their food, speaking something to them in Chinese.

Nikki pulled her hand away at the same time that Steve let it go, both of them catching the others eye as they did. He saw tenderness and then a hint of shyness as she looked away and put both hands in her lap.

"This looks good," Nikki said as she glanced up at him for just a split second, feeling her heart begin to race over his attention that was directed at her and not the dinner.

He had yet to look at the food set down before him, to intoxicated over the woman sitting across from him. She'd suddenly taken on a new form that had his mind racing. '_What's happening here?_' he thought to himself. '_What's she thinking right now? Shit. She probably thinks I'm a snake for groping her hand like that. Shit! Pull it together man,' _he scolded himself._ 'Why does she have to look so goddamn beautiful? It's killing me.'_

"It does look good," he finally replied. "Be careful of the spicy lamb. It's got a kick to it."

"I like spicy. When I was in Seattle," she began as she scooped some fried rice on her plate and then handed it over to him, "I went to this Cuban restaurant and they had habanero peppers and cheese that were breaded and deep fried. They came with a habanero sauce for dipping." She looked over at him with wide eyes, "That was hot!"

Steve laughed as he set the bowl of rice down. "Would you try it again?"

"Hell no. I couldn't talk. Seriously," she laughed, "I couldn't even hold a conversation for about an hour."

They both laughed over that.

He picked up the lamb and scooped some out on her plate over the rice. "This isn't that spicy but it's damn good."

She in turn picked up a scoop of the pigs ears and set it on his plate. "On the count of three," she grinned.

Steve eyed the weird looking pieces of meat on his plate that were fried strips. "Can I have some ranch dressing to dip em' in?"

Nikki laughed even harder, "No! As is. C'mon, its not that bad."

"I feel like I'm getting the short end of the stick here." He moved the strange meat around with his fork. "At least the lamb looks edible."

"You'll be surprised. Ready?" she scooped up some of the lamb as he did the same with the pig's ear.

"Ok, one, two…two and a half."

"Three," Nikki finished and took a bite, watching his reaction as he did the same.

He cringed at first but then his expression slowly changed as he chewed the strange meat until he finally smiled.

"Hey, it's not that bad. I thought it would be chewy, but it's not. It's kinda sweet tasting."

"I told you," Nikki said proudly.

"What about the lamb?" he asked.

"It's good," she declared, taking a drink of her beer.

"Do want to switch?" Steve asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes!" Nikki agreed, lifting up her plate as he did the same, handing them across to each other as they both giggled over it.

"Much better," Steve said pleased as he mixed the lamb in with the rice.

"Yes," Nikki agreed and pretended to wave down the waitress, "excuse me can I get a side of ranch."

"Hey! Not fair!" Steve chuckled as they both laughed over her joke.

They ate and talked some more about her time in Seattle and what had eventually brought her home. He spoke of his final days in the Navy and touched briefly on coming home to catch the man that had murdered his father. She didn't ask details and he was glad for that. He was enjoying himself more than he thought he would and didn't want to ruin the moment with such a morbid story.

They ordered another round of beers after eating dinner and began to talk about the case.

"Can you tell me if you have any suspects?" Nikki asked.

"Not yet," Steve shook his head, "But we will. I promise you that. It's just a matter of time. They're getting more daring and that's when we'll catch them."

"I think you will too. You're too smart for them."

He chuckled over that, "Let's hope so."

"You are, and you never give up, ever. I know that first hand. You never gave up on me."

He thought of the reason for it, "I promised Stuart I'd watch over you."

She leaned forward resting her arms on the table, her voice soft but curious. "What happened with Stuart?" she asked. "I never asked before, because I wasn't sure I could handle it. But now time has made it easier and you were there with him. Can you tell me what happened?"

She saw a look appear in his eyes that made her immediately regret asking.

Steve felt a cold chill run through him, wishing she hadn't asked that question. He'd laid Stuart to rest years before but now having to talk about it with her of all people was like cutting open that old wound again. How could he possibly tell her that he was to blame? For the first time in a long time he was afraid, afraid she'd hate him for it. For the past couple of days since seeing her again, he'd struggled to keep his thoughts focused on the young girl he'd helped recover from drugs, but the beautiful and charming woman that she'd become had captivated him. He didn't want to hurt her.

He liked the way she looked at him too and didn't want that to change either. He was physically and now after sharing conversations with her, emotionally attracted to her, but couldn't bring himself to act on those urges that she easily brought out in him, having one more excuse now not to. She had him fighting against himself more than any other woman he'd ever known, and it was continuously torturing him.

"I'm sorry, Steve. Do you not want to talk about it? I understand if you don't."

"It was the one of the worst days of my life," he confessed.

That instantly brought tears to her eyes, seeing that it wasn't just a play on words, he meant it. "I'm sorry. We don't have to talk about it."

"You deserve to know what happened to your brother, Nikki."

"Just tell me one thing," she whispered, "was he scared?"

He hadn't relived that moment in long time, but it was fresh in his mind as if it were yesterday. "Only for you," he said truthfully.

Those words filled her with relief and a great sadness but also love. "I miss him."

"I'm so sorry, Nikki." He meant it both for her loss and for his guilt.

She forced a smile for his sake, wanting to talk about something else besides Stuart's death, not knowing it would hurt him as much as it did her.

"I remember the picture of you in your uniform on the wall by the stairs in your father's house. How strong and resilient you looked in it and I used to think how lucky we were that men like you and Stuart were out there defending our country. I'm sorry I lost my brother, but he died doing exactly what he felt he was called to do in life. I'm not sorry about that."

She had managed once again to floor him. She understood. How she came to find her way to understand why they did what they did didn't matter to him, all that mattered was that she understood. His admiration for her was growing by the second. Would it ever stop, this woman's ability to surprise him just when he thought he had a handle on her?

"Steve," Nikki said to him, pointing at his ringing phone on the table.

"What?" he replied, almost in a daze.

"Your phone," she said again, "it's ringing." She chuckled over his demeanor as he stared at her in the most intriguing way. She could just see the thoughts turning in his head, wondering what it was he was thinking at that second.

He looked down and saw Danny's name across the screen. Normally he would answer without hesitation, but at that second he didn't want to get called away from where he was. Before he could make that decision it was made for him by going to voicemail. '_Problem solved_,' he thought happily.

"You don't need to get that?' Nikki asked him, pleased that he had let it go.

"Its probably nothing." But seconds later it began to ring again.

"He's persistent," Nikki chuckled.

"That he is," Steve sighed loudly as he reached for the phone. "Excuse me," he got up from the table and walked a couple of feet away before answering.

"What?"

"What do mean what?" Danny replied, "What kind of way is that to answer the phone you animal?"

Steve rolled his eyes, "What do you want, Daniel?"

"It sounds like I interrupted something important. Where are you?"

"At dinner."

"Dinner?" He thought that odd since he'd told him he was going to visit his father's grave. "With who?"

"Must you know every detail of my life? Am I not allowed to have dinner with someone without calling you first?"

"With someone, huh?" he badgered him only because he knew he was irritating him. "Who is she?"

"How do you know it's a she?"

"Because otherwise you wouldn't be in such a big hurry to get back to them. So who is she?"

Steve let out a low growl. "It's Nikki, all right! Happy now? Be sure to write that down in your diary."

"That was a good one," he chuckled. "So you finally asked her out?"

"No," Steve replied irritably, "I ran in to her when I went to see my father."

"She was there?!" he asked surprised over that. "At the cemetery?"

"Yes. She knew my Dad pretty well. She was paying her respects."

"Wow, that's cool."

"Yea, so anyway, can we please get back to the reason why you called and are insisting on ruining my night by keeping me on the phone?"

"Oh yea, the warrant for the release of the videos from the security company came in. You need to sign them so we can forward them on and get them uploaded."

"I'll do it tomorrow."

"It'll take you five minutes. Can't you just swing by the office since you're already out and just do it? That way we're ahead of the game tomorrow."

"Jesus, you're a pain in my ass, Daniel. Fine! Ok, I'll go. I'm hanging up now."

"Where did you take her to dinner? I hope not some dive restaurant in Chinatown that you love to frequent."

Steve pulled the phone away from his ear and hung up, ending the conversation with a satisfied grin, assured that Danny was out there somewhere laughing his ass off over it.

He sat back down at the table, "Sorry about that. It was Danny. I need to go to my office and sign a form. It's part of the investigation from your robbery."

Nikki tilted her head and smiled, "I'd love to see where you work. Can I go?"

He wasn't expecting her to ask, but he was also regretting cutting the evening short, so he welcomed the company. "Sure. I guess, if you want? You can follow me over."

"Ok."

...

They pulled up to the station and he parked in his usual spot. Nikki parked next to him.

They got out at the same time and she began to walk toward the entrance, assured that's the direction he would go as well.

"We have a different entrance," he said, pointing to the side. "We could go that way, but the side entrance over here takes us directly to the Five-O offices."

"Oh, well aren't you special," she teased him. "Lead the way, Commander."

"Working for the Governor has its perks."

He punched in a couple of numbers on the keypad, releasing the lock on the secured door and held it open for her. She walked through first and gave him an impressed look as she did. He couldn't help but feel like the 'Big Kahuna' that Chin had nicknamed him. He'd never brought anyone there after hours before that didn't have to do with the job. She was special.

"Wow, Steve," she said, clearly even more impressed as they came down the hallway that led to the common area where the computer table and monitors that hung on the wall were. "This is really state of the art stuff. You've got some serious backing."

"I told you, it pays to work for the Governor."

"You must do a really, really good job then," she chuckled, standing before the large computer as he kept walking toward his office.

"That's Danny's office over there," he pointed, "and Chin's is there and Kono's is there." He opened the glass door, inviting her in to his, "And this is mine."

"Mmm," she purred as she walked by him with an equally pleased smile, brushing her shoulder against his chest as he held the door for her.

He felt the hairs on his arms rise up, the tingling sensation felt nice.

She wasn't just trying to please him, she was truly impressed by the offices, especially his. "This is nice," she said as she came inside, standing in the middle and looking around. "It's relaxing and inviting. Not intimidating as you would think maybe it should be."

"Why intimidating," he asked as he came inside, letting the glass door close behind him.

"You're a Police Officer, I don't know, I just assumed I guess for criminals."

"We have an interrogation room that's very intimidating, but this is my office, I don't bring criminals in here. Only people I like," he grinned as he walked past her to his desk and sat down, flipping open his laptop.

She liked the sound of that even though she was pretty sure he meant it in a general sort of way, or did he? She couldn't quite distinguish his feelings toward her. Were they headed towards friends zone, or were those lingering stares that she caught him in mean something else? There were no doubts that she was attracted to him that had been a certainty for years. That attraction was in full bloom now as she watched him perform his duty. He looked regal and could have been on the cover of GQ or some other high profile magazine the way he looked in the oversized leather chair, dressed in the long sleeved, blue Oxford shirt that showed off his deep Hawaiian tan. Even his hair was perfect with the slight colic that rose up past his forehead. She caught herself staring now, turning away and spotting something in a glass case on the wall.

"I've seen that before," she said, pointing at the display of the 1700's Clipper ship model behind the glass.

Steve looked over in the direction she was pointing and smiled. "My dad made that."

"Oh yea!" Nikki smiled as she walked over to it. "I remember now. It was in the house on the shelf in the dining room."

Steve came up behind her and stood, admiring it as well, impressed that she remembered it. "It's probably the most prized possession I own," he confessed.

Nikki looked over her shoulder at him, getting a whiff of his cologne that only enhanced her attraction. "Even with all these medals and certificates of excellence?" she asked, indicating the several-framed items that had been given to him from both the military and the HPD.

"They're replaceable, this isn't. I remember watching him build it when I was little. Do you see all the little people on the deck?" he reached around her and pointed them out. "He let me do that part. I remember I was so excited, but he was patient and let me do it all by myself. It took me almost a week to decide where I wanted them and then to glue them down."

Nikki smiled, "How old were you?"

"Eight or nine."

She sighed, "That's a nice memory, Steve. You picked a good place for it."

It felt good sharing that with her, only because she knew the man who was his father, unlike the others in the office who only knew what he divulged to them. He hadn't even told Danny that story. He was pretty sure it was nothing more than just a big ship to him, but to Nikki…she saw it the same as him, a piece of legacy from his father. He loved that about her.

She admired the ship a little longer, as he, unbeknownst to her, admired her. That voice in his head rose up again as his thoughts of wanting to possess her in an intimate way began to overtake him.

She was several inches shorter than him, which worked well for the fantasy that he was currently playing out in his head. He imagined moving the hair away from her neck and kissing her there and then tilting her head back and kissing her lips, wondering what she would do if he indeed did it? Would she kiss him back? And where would it lead them then? He hadn't been in a relationship for a while, to preoccupied or not stimulated enough by the women that he'd met to pursue it, but he couldn't deny that from the second he'd walked into that crime scene he'd wanted nothing more than to pursue the woman he'd carried out of there.

Nikki could almost feel the heat and strength from his body as he stood behind her. He had a masculine and dominating presence that she wasn't even sure he was aware of. She wanted to lean back into him and feel his arm come around her body from behind and hold her close up against him. She would lean her head back and pull him down to her lips and kiss him. She bit her bottom lip wondering what he would do if she tried it, the temptation was so strong she could feel her body moving in that direction just out of sheer desire for him.

"Can I see the interrogation room?" she asked, turning her head just slightly, seeing him looking at her from her peripheral view.

"Sure." He was glad for the distraction because he wasn't sure he had the strength to move away from her. She had him on the run once again and the rational side of him was having a hard time catching up to his emotional one.

His voice was low and the tone of it made her turn. She thought for a second he was going to kiss her by the way he was looking at her, but regrettably he moved away, avoiding any true intimacy with her.

'_Damn!_' she thought to herself. '_Are you or are you not attracted to me? I can't figure you out._'

He explained the process of the interrogation room as they made their way down the hallway to it. He stood outside the door with his hand on the doorknob and narrowed his eyes as if contemplating his next words.

"Hmm, I hope they cleaned up the mess from the last time we were in here."

Nikki looked at him queerly. "Mess? What kind of mess?"

"Well you know," Steve teased her, "sometimes it takes a little more persuasion to get the truth out of them."

"What do you mean? What kind of persuasion?" she asked still shocked over his last statement.

"I told you, having full immunity from the Governor has its perks. There are all sorts of ways to persuade someone, electric shock, hang them upside on the wall, water hose is always a good one, it cleans up the messes from the tools that I sometimes have to use."

Nikki's mouth hung open as she stared at the door, picturing the contents behind it to mirror a mid-evil torture chamber. "Oh my God."

Steve swung the door open as she automatically took a step back not sure she wanted to go in now, but heard him laugh and then saw what he was laughing about. The room consisted of nothing more than a chair in the center of it.

"Oh my God!" she laughed, gently slugging him in the arm as she went past him into the room. "You were feeding me a line of bullshit."

"And you were eating it up," he laughed.

"I started to see you in a whole new light," she chuckled, "it was scary."

Steve grinned, "I only question them, I don't touch them, I promise."

Nikki sat down in the chair and looked over at him as he leaned against the wall with his arms crossed. "This place doesn't need anything, it's intimidating on its own," she acknowledged the obvious.

"That's the way we designed it."

"Do you always get what you want out of them?" she asked, standing up and walking over to the wall opposite him, leaning back against it.

"Most times." He shifted his body so he could see face her.

"So this room pretty much makes people reveal their secrets," she said, looking across at him.

"That's what we aim for."

"So if I was to interrogate you then, would I get the truth?"

He was intrigued over this game, "I hate liars. I deal with them everyday, so ask away. You'll get the truth."

This was her opportunity to break it all wide open, hoping she wasn't going to make a fool of herself again, but she couldn't stand it anymore. She had to know.

"Ok," she said, looking shyly down at her feet, taking a leap of faith as she looked back up and directly across at him. "Have you ever pictured me in a way other than Stuart's little sister?"

It was about a million miles away from where he thought this game was going, feeling his heart begin to pound in his chest. He hated liars though, so he answered honestly. "Yes," he responded, trying to conceal the guilty shyness that was rising up in him from that reply.

Nikki however showed her happiness over it with a wide smile. She glanced at her feet again, contemplating her next question, but not for long, too curious to hear the answer. "Have you ever thought about kissing me?"

"Yes."

He was starting to like this game more and more.

She liked that answer even more, but the next question she hoped would reveal how he really perceived her. "Do you think you'll ever be able to stand in a room with me and see me as a woman and not a little sister?"

"I am right now."

She'd broken the seal that had been holding him back. He didn't think he'd ever see her as the little sister ever again, assured now that the feelings were mutual.

"My turn," he said.

Nikki blushed slightly as she looked down at her feet. "Ok."

"Do you want me to kiss you?" It was bold and to the point, putting the ball in her court.

She looked up at him and spoke without hesitation. "Yes." She saw his mouth form a slight smile over that as he pushed off the wall and made his way over to her.

She fidgeted from the impact of his stare, feeling as if he were holding her up with his gaze as he slowly made his way over to her. The anticipation of his arrival was the most erotic experience of her life, feeling her heart racing out of control.

He felt the shift as he now had the upper hand, watching her face as it softened and her famine features blushed over his boldness. On his way to her she became even more beautiful than ever. He had to control the urge to run or to take her too quickly, wanting to savor this moment. He didn't consider himself a romantic guy by any means but his first kiss proved that he was capable.

Nikki felt his hand slowly slide up her cheek and glide through her hair, gently coming to rest on the back of her neck as he lifted her face up to his and kissed her.

He heard a small whimper come from her, which only encouraged him.

She replied to his effort by allowing him to take her fully as the warmth from it made her body soar with delight. His talent was even more satisfying than her imagination had played out.

He slid his arm around her small waist and pulled her up closer against him. She felt good, but not as good as when she cupped the back of his neck and prolonged the pleasurable moment, letting him know that she was enjoying it as much as he was.

When they finally broke from it he moved back just enough so he could see her face but still remained intimately close.

"Anything else you want to ask me, Nikki?"

She bit her bottom lip; he was undoubtedly the sexiest man she'd ever met. "Can I have another one?" she whispered to him.

He smiled over that, leaning in and giving her what she asked for.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

Steve opened his front door and smiled at Nikki as she held up a grocery bag in each hand, water dripping from her nose as the rain outside pounded on the roof of the porch.

"I come barring gifts. Permission to enter?"

Steve reached out taking the bags from her, "Permission granted, but it'll cost you a kiss."

Nikki released the bags and put her wet hands on his face, giving him a quick one on the lips.

"Hello," she grinned.

"Get in here," he replied, stepping back and allowing her to enter. He kicked the door shut with his foot as he followed her into the kitchen.

"I can't believe how hard its raining out," Nikki declared, running her hand over her long blond hair. "I got this wet just coming from the car."

"Well at least it's not a hurricane anymore," Steve said, "they down sized it to just a tropical storm."

He set the bags down on the counter, peeking inside as Nikki nudged him out of the way.

"I told you, it's a surprise."

"How do you know I'll like it?"

"Because I just do." She leaned over and kissed him. "Now go sit and watch the game and dinner will be ready in about half an hour."

"I'd rather watch you."

She blushed over that, nudging him with her hip. "Go."

"Fine," he moaned, walking away.

Twenty minutes later Nikki peeked her head around the corner of the family room, "It's ready."

Steve jumped off the couch rubbing his hands together, following her into the kitchen. The table was already set and the food on the plates.

"Tah dah," she exclaimed, showing off the entrees.

"Are those onion burgers?"

"Yes," she smiled proudly. "Your dad showed me how to make them. I remember him telling me that they were your favorite."

He went to her and put both arms around her waist. "Thank you. It is my favorite. I haven't had one in years."

Pleasing him was so easy she thought. He didn't put any expectations on her or the relationship that was evolving into something nice. It was her second trip to his house and technically their third date. He'd come to her house once, but only to pick her up to take her to dinner at a nice restaurant in one of the fancy hotels in Waikiki.

He sat down and took a drink of the beer that was opened at the head of his plate. "I feel spoiled," he admitted, "but I could get used to this." He squeezed some ketchup over the burger and put the top on and smashed it down, admiring the juices as they spilled out the side of the meat. "Ahhh, look at that," he said happily, "just like Dad used to make."

Nikki couldn't have been more pleased with his reaction. She imitated his move and they took a bite at the same time.

"Does it taste ok?" she asked him.

"Perfection," he smiled, washing it down with a drink of his beer. "You did great, thank you," he said sincerely.

"You're welcome. I think your Dad would be…" she was stopped mid sentence by a loud crack of thunder that startled both of them, causing Nikki to shriek and Steve to instinctively duck. At the same time the lights went out.

"Holy shit that was loud!" he said, standing up and going to the front door. He opened it up and felt a gust of wind with a blanket of mist from the rain that continued to come down in buckets. He quickly closed it again. "The whole block is out."

Nikki stood behind him, holding on to the back of his shirt, feeling safer by being in close proximity to him.

He turned around and smiled over the concerned look on her face. "Are you scared?"

"No! Well, maybe a little. That freaked me out!" she admitted.

He put his arm around her, guiding her back to the kitchen. "Freaked me out too."

The sun had yet to set but with the storm raging outside it wasn't producing the light it normally would have at five o'clock in the afternoon.

"Do you have candles?" Nikki asked.

"No. I don't think so, but I do have a lot flashlights." He set her down at the table and went to the garage, knowing exactly where they were.

She watched him disappear through the garage door and nervously looked around the room, hearing the storm raging outside. He appeared seconds later with three flashlights. He turned them on and set them on the table so they were all standing and pointing toward the ceiling.

"It might not be as traditional as a candlelit dinner," he joked, "but close enough."

"You make it romantic," she chimed in, putting her hand on his knee as he sat back down. "My hero."

Steve laughed over that. "All I did was go to the garage and get a flashlight. If that makes me a hero then you are very easy to please."

"I guess so then."

They finished eating and cleaned up the mess the best they could in the dark as the sun set the rest of the way.

"Now what should we do?" Nikki asked with the lights still out.

Steve slid up close to her, "Well if I was sixteen I'd say let's make out."

She blushed shyly over that. They'd kissed here and there and it felt comfortable and natural, but they'd yet to have another long, romantic kissing session like the one in the interrogation room. He was always a gentleman with her, never forcing himself on her or making her feel pressured about sleeping with him. At the end of the night he said goodnight and left it at that. She wasn't naïve to men's advances having her share of lovers, three to be exact over the past five years, but it seemed most men after the second date, some even the first, always expected that next giant leap, but he didn't. It was refreshing.

"We could tell stories around the flashlight," she joked.

"What kind of stories?"

She became serious as she looked up at him. "I'd like to know the story about Stuart."

He felt a cold chill run through him over that subject, but it was the second time she'd asked him that question. He couldn't put her off any longer and he couldn't lie to her either, but he did fear she wouldn't look at him the same way anymore if she knew the truth.

"I know this is a hard subject for you Steve, but we only have to talk about it this one time. I'll never ask about it again, I promise." She needed to know for her own sake, she needed to know what had happened to her brother.

It was better to do it now he thought, and get it over with before he fell any harder for her than he already had. If she wanted to make a break from him because of what he had done, then he wanted it to be now rather than later. "Ok, Nikki. You deserve to know."

She led him over to the family room and she sat down on the couch, but he didn't join her there, instead he sat on the edge of the coffee table wanting to face her dead on when he confessed his responsibility to her over her brother's death. She deserved that too.

"Our unit was on patrols," he began; glad that it was semi dark now so he could hide behind it, or maybe it was better that he couldn't see her. "We were ambushed from the rooftop and forced down a long narrow passageway between two buildings. Everyone took shelter in doorways. Stuart and I were together."

She almost instructed him to stop there, hearing something distressing in his voice, but she couldn't bring herself to speak. She needed to put Stuart to rest and was hoping this would help. She had made up hundreds of scenarios of that day, but never knew which one was the right one.

"We needed to get to the end of the alley, but it was risky. We couldn't go all at once or they'd pick us off. But someone had to make the first move to return fire while the others escaped down the same path. I was the leader, it was my job." He closed his eyes, regretting his move to this day. "I ordered Stuart to go with me." He shook his head. "Halfway down the alleyway he was shot in the neck."

Nikki gasped, feeling those words sting her in the heart. Tears instantly welled in her eyes. "Oh Stuart," she whispered through her hands that covered her mouth. Finally hearing the true story hurt worst than she thought it would.

He heard her anguish, but worst than that he felt it, as well as the blame for it. "I'm sorry Nikki. It was my fault. I should have waited. I was so sure we could…" he stopped himself from making an excuse, changing his words. "I was over confident and it cost your brother his life," he shivered over the last words but looked at her straight on, willing to take on whatever anger and resentment she might have felt at that second towards him. "I'm so sorry."

He had crumbled before her eyes in just a matter of seconds. Gone was the strong, resilient man she had grown to admire and fall in love with. The guilt over what he felt he had done was unjust she thought. "If you could go back and do it again, do you think you would you do it differently?"

"Yes," he said, admitting to her that guilt.

"Would you?" she asked again. "Because I don't think that's true. I trust you and so did Stuart. I don't believe you had anything to do with Stuart's death. You didn't put a bullet in his neck; you were trying to guide him to safety."

"There were so many factors that I didn't take into consideration."

"Then you had time to sort out several different plans?"

He shook his head, "No. I don't know, maybe."

"Yes or no," she demanded. "Did you make several different plans and choose the most dangerous one because you felt 'over confident'?"

"No," he quickly replied, alarmed over her tone, feeling that fear over what he had predicted, he was going to lose her.

"Then why? Why did you take my brother down that alley?"

"We needed to get cover for the others and our path held the minimal amount of danger. I felt if we could get to the end we could cover fire for the others. They knew they had us pinned down. It was only a matter of time before they started dropping explosives."

"Then you made an impulsive decision?"

"Yes."

"Who else died?"

"No one," he replied, relieved over that. Stuart's death was hard enough.

It was dark but she could still see him, but it was his voice that gave it all away. '_How sad for him_,' she thought, '_to be carrying that around for so long.'_

"I wanted to tell you," he confessed. He couldn't look at her, "I understand Nikki if you're…" he paused, "if you're angry. You have a right to be."

"No I don't," she challenged him. "And you have no right to feel guilty over what happened to him. I know Stuart. He didn't shy away from fear, but he wasn't a fool and he didn't take unnecessary risks either. He followed you because he agreed with your decision, not just because it was an order." She knelt down on the ground in front of him, forcing him to look at her. "That's what I believe and nothing or no one, not even your guilt will change my mind."

He'd been waiting for the bomb to drop on him and wipe out all her feelings for him, but what he hadn't expected was her allowing him full and complete exoneration from that day. "Nikki, I'm sorry."

"Don't you see what's happening here between you and I?"

He finally looked at her, but was puzzled over the connection between what he had done and their relationship.

"I miss Stuart, but I also know how much he loved me. He sent you to me? Don't you see that? That proves to me that he trusted you and it also proves to me that he didn't blame you for what happened, so you have to stop feeling that guilt and let it go. He brought us together. It's what he wanted."

He felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up over that new revelation that had never crossed his mind before. He recalled holding him as he spoke his last words; she was right, they weren't anger or resentment; they were about her and needing his promise to watch out for her.

It was the second time that she had managed to change his life for the better, not an easy feat by any means, yet she had succeeded so gracefully with her words.

"What about you, Nikki?" he asked her. "Now I have to know something. Can you still look at me the same way, knowing what you do?"

She considered that the easiest question ever been asked of her, but she also felt just telling him wasn't going convince him, so instead she showed him.

She never ceased to amaze him with her methods that could easily move him into a place that was foreign to him. She was a master at seeking out those places and bringing them to light for him to enjoy. This kiss was another one of her masterworks.

He slid off the table and was kneeling before her as well now, taking in all that she was offering, proving to him in the most delightful and truthful way that nothing had changed between them.

The wind howled outside and the rain pounded on the roof but neither one was aware of anything other than the person kneeling in front of them.

He held her close up against him, feeling the same need from her as their bodies melted into one another.

"Stay the night with me, Nikki," he asked her.

She didn't hesitate, wanting it just as badly as he did. "Yes," she whispered. "Take me up to your room."

He kissed her for that, wanting her so badly that if she hadn't requested that when she did, he might have taken her right then and there. But the idea of her in his bed was just as stimulating and worth the extra couple of minutes it took to get her there.

Nikki held his hand as he led her up the stairs. Her heart pounded fiercely, but not from a nervous tension like she would have anticipated if this moment ever came to light, it beat rapidly out of sheer pleasure and joy. She was in love with him. There was no doubt in her mind, and she was overjoyed that she felt a similar closeness coming from him. She wasn't sure if he was feeling the love that she was and she didn't care because what he was currently displaying for her was just as gratifying.

He turned to her as they entered his room, eager to see the same light in her eyes that he had downstairs, hoping that she hadn't had second thoughts as they made their way up to his room.

He was both relieved and aroused as she kissed him, giving him the green light to fulfill the fantasy that had evaded his thoughts and wouldn't be stifled until he had her.

She lifted up on the bottom of his T-shirt breaking from the kiss just long enough to pull it over his head as he raised his arms. She let it fall to the floor as he forcefully pulled her against his bare chest and kissed her again, leaning her back as it grew with intensity.

She felt as if her body was going to explode if she didn't satisfy this want for him soon. As if he could read her mind he lifted her up and laid her back on his bed, not breaking the rhythm of the delightful kiss that was setting the tone. He was going to ravish her and she couldn't wait for the moment to happen.

She bent her knees moving him between them as he began to simulate the act, which made her moan in eagerness for the actual feel of him inside of her.

She felt his hand slide down the outside of her thigh and move under her skirt that was now bunched up around her hips. He rolled them on their side, slipping her panties off and then rolled over on top of her again. It was so seamless that she barely had time to catch her breath from the erotic way in which it had been performed.

He'd never been so physically possessed by a woman before that he felt this type of eagerness to be inside of her. His sexual arousal was only heightened by her equaled enthusiasm as she pulled down on his shorts and boxer briefs, freeing him and then saying his name as if begging him to do it now and not prolong her agony with removing anymore of her clothes or foreplay which could be explored with their next liaison, she wanted him now.

Nikki gasped with pleasure as he touched her between the legs. He let out a soft moan over the wetness that only encouraged him. There was no doubt that she wanted him just as eagerly.

She gasped again only with more passion as he used that want for her to both of their advantages as he slid into her with one gentle motion.

She lifted her hips off the bed and pushed into him, carried away by the feelings that erupted inside of her. It wasn't just the carnal act of sex that was bringing her the most pleasure; it came from the man that was performing it.

He felt a warmth rise up and spread over his body with every new stroke. He slid his arm under her waist and braced his other just above her head, rising up and taking her with him as he increased the momentum, seeing and hearing her enthusiasm over that move which only encouraged him.

She reached out in the darkness and put a hand on his bicep, grasping it as her fingers and nails dug into his skin, overwhelmed by the intensity of his technique. She was torn over wanting to feel the orgasm that was building inside of her but in the same breath she didn't want the erotic pleasure he was giving her to end, ever.

She lost the battle as it welled up inside of her, taking control of mind and body, filling that voided space in her life, in her body, in her heart, calling out the name of the man she'd been waiting for all that time.

It was a sound he wanted to hear repeated over and over; never knowing it could bring him such satisfaction or that the woman that was attached to the voice could so sexually gratify him, but she grabbed ahold of him from the inside out as the climax of their intimacy came full circle for him.

Nikki slid her hand up into his hair, holding him as he rested his head on her shoulder while his body calmed from the aftermath. She could feel his warm breath on her neck as it came in quick short gasps. He seemed to be drained of strength, which made her smile, pleased that he had enjoyed it as much as she had.

He rose up to say something clever to her but when they made eye contact the words vanished from his thoughts.

Her sheer beauty and the way she was looking at him left him speechless.

There was nothing to say, he felt it had already been said between the looks, lowering himself back down until his lips were on hers, kissing her in a way that made him thankful and fortunate to be where he was at that second.

...

Nikki opened her eyes seeing just a hint of morning light through the sheer curtains on the lanai doors. The storm had passed in the night and she chuckled softly, realizing neither one of them had really even noticed it after they had gone to bed.

She rolled over on her back, feeling him come awake as she had. His hand slowly moved up her naked body as she put both of hers over top of it, guiding him to where she wanted to be touched.

Her skin was so soft that he felt his hands too rough and unworthy to touch her, but she didn't think so, guiding him down her stomach and up her thigh as she bent one leg, leading him back down and up over her breasts, her neck, kissing the palm of his hand as she brushed it over her lips.

He rolled over on top of her as she opened her legs, welcoming him again, feeling his want for her pressed against her stomach as he kissed her.

Their first time was explosive unable to control the craving for one another. The second was soothing and patient; she felt this one was going to mirror that. He made her feel as if he were enamored of her body, removing all her clothes and taking his time with her. She couldn't have been more pleased, or satisfied.

...

"You're too tall," Nikki laughed, "I'm freezing back here!"

Steve turned around in the shower and put his hands on her hips, switching places with her.

"Better?" he asked, moving her under the warm water.

Nikki moaned and smiled up at him. "Much. You're sweet." She stood up on her toes and kissed him. "Are you cold now?"

"You're making me hot," he winked at her, "so no, I'm just fine."

She rolled her eyes at his playfulness, snuggling up to him and laying her head on his shoulder. "I wish you didn't have to go to work."

He caressed her back and down over her buttocks growling as he did, "Me too".

She leaned back so she could see his face. "Do you want to come over tonight?"

He gave his reply before he kissed her. "Absolutely."

She wanted him again, and again and again, wishing they could lie in bed all day and do nothing but make love, talk, sleep, repeat.

He wanted the same, or at least as far as he could master until he had to leave for work, telling her so with his kiss and even more so directly.

"Once more before I go to work? You're already going to possess my thoughts all day so I might as well make it worth my while and be late." He squeezed her around the waist. "What do you say gorgeous, one more roll in the hay?"

Nikki wouldn't, nor could she resist his offer. Looking directly at him was hard enough with his unshaven face that screamed out masculinity, but she already knew what lied ahead with that offer, and a thousand horses couldn't pull her away from him. "Yes. Yes, oh yes," she whispered putting her arms around his neck and kissing him.

He reached past her and turned the water off, gripping her tighter around the body while she did the same around his neck. He lifted her up as she wrapped her legs around his waist. He held still in that position, holding her with little restrain.

"I want to know you better," he blurted out.

She took that as he had meant it. She mattered in his life.

"I'm an open book for you."

He liked that response and told her so with a kiss.

He came out of the bathroom still holding her while they both giggled over it as he made his way to the bed, crawling up from the bottom and laying her down, nestling between her legs as he did.

"You know," she said to him, running her hand over his still moist hair, "that open book thing goes both ways."

He smiled, brushing the tip of his nose over hers, "ok, but I think you might get bored after the first chapter."

"Never, I think it'll be a masterpiece." She lifted her hips and began to slowly stroke him,

The conversation came to a halt with that move as he kissed her and set out to accomplish what he had brought her there for.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven**

"I got blood!" Kono called out as she bent over the shattered glass that had once been a jewelry display.

"Has anyone else been in here since the robbery?" Steve asked as he quickly made his way over to her, stepping over pieces of broken glass, hoping this would be the break they'd been looking for.

"Nope," Kono replied. "Only one employee was here when it happened and he has no cuts of abrasions."

"Ok, that's good news. Get a sample of this and get it back to the lab and see if we can find a match." He heard a high-pitched whistle and turned seeing Danny outside the door motioning for him to come out.

"I questioned the owner who was the only witness," he said as Steve stepped through the open front door. "It was the same format as Franklin Jewelry. Just minutes after the door was open for business four masked individuals came in and did a smash and grab and were out in less than two minutes."

"But this time they left us a gift," Steve grinned.

"You got a print?" Danny asked.

"Better. Blood."

"Nice," Danny smiled. "It was only a matter of time."

"Nikki will be happy. She's been patient but I know she's anxious for us to find the people that did this."

"How's she doing? Is she looking for another job?"

"The Franklin's are paying her salary until they re-open, which should be in about a month."

"Wow. That's awfully generous of them."

"She was a good employee and just an overall good person. I'm not surprised."

Danny let out a loud laugh. "So I take it you two have moved on to the next level."

Steve shot him a look, "What do you mean by that?"

"Do you deny it?"

"Deny what, that we've been seeing each other?"

"No. That you're sleeping together too."

Steve huffed, "You're crazy." He turned and began to walk away from him.

"Look me in the eye and deny it then."

Steve stopped and turned, looking him straight on with an irritated stare but said nothing.

"That's what I thought," Danny chuckled.

"Do you have a problem with that?"

"No, of course not. Now if you had just met her and were somehow taking advantage of the fact that she was a victim and vulnerable, then I might be a little concerned."

"That's pathetic."

"Exactly."

"So what's your point then?"

"No point, you've just been very closed mouth about her since you guys went to dinner a few nights ago so I'm just trying to gather some facts."

"You're quite the gumshoe, Daniel." He turned again and began walking toward the store entrance.

"So you like this girl?" he followed a step behind him.

Steve sighed heavily as he stepped through the doors, hearing a crunching sound beneath his feet of broken glass. "You're very perceptive, now can we move on from this subject?"

Danny smiled, both from the badgering that had hit a nerve and for the fact that he liked her. She seemed like a nice person and he'd yet to see Steve in any kind of serious relationship since knowing him. There had been dates here and there but nothing too serious, this just somehow seemed different. She charmed him from that very first day, never seeing that side of him before either. It was a refreshing change from the unemotional, steel personality that was the norm.

"Hey Chin," Steve said as he approached him, seeing him staring down at the computer tablet in his hand. "What do you got?"

"Surveillance from the security cameras. They have an in store system." He put his finger on the screen and moved the time frame back to when the men first entered.

Danny and Steve stood on either side of him as he held it out so they could all watch it.

The format was identical to the Franklin robbery. Four men all dressed in black from head to toe, each carrying a small, black duffel bag followed the leader. The first guy that entered held a steelhead mallet, his only job was to smash the glass and look at his watch as the other men gathered the jewelry. They were swift and not at all greedy, just taking what they could get.

"Amateurs," Steve said as both Chin and Danny nodded, getting what he meant. If they had been pros then they would have known exactly what to take and even worked on taking the extra time to filtrate the safe, but they didn't. They had run across that scenario with the Franklin video but had decided that perhaps there were too many occupants of the store to risk the safe so they moved on, but now they were convinced that they never even had it in mind, which made them amateurs. All three men know without question that the majority of the uncut diamonds and wealth would be in the safe.

"Why wouldn't they go for the safe?" Chin spoke out loud in a perplexed tone.

"They're criminals," Danny replied. "They ain't the sharpest tools in the shed and I think these guys are even dumber than that."

Steve huffed, "Well they've managed to elude the police for four robberies so what does that say about us?"

Chin chuckled while Danny rolled his eyes, "They all fuck up eventually."

"Yes they do," Chin agreed as they continued to watch the video, "wait for it…" he grinned. "And there it is." He pointed at one of the men who had reached inside one of the glass cases at the last second as the others were fleeing, liking something he saw, but as he pulled his arm back out a jagged piece of glass caught his shirt. He tugged it free but in the process had cut his forearm, leaving a trace of blood and their first good piece of evidence.

"Let's just hope he's a career idiot," Danny said, "and we get a match from the DNA."

…..

"Hey," Kono said as she opened Steve's door to his office. 'The blood results are back and I think you're going to like them."

Steve closed his laptop with a wide grin as he pushed away from his desk and stood up. "Am I going to be really happy or just happy?"

"Really happy!" Kono replied, holding the door open as he came toward her.

They walked together out to the computer table meeting Chin and Danny who were discussing an upcoming football game.

"Ok," Steve said, "I'm ready for my present.

"Not only do we have a match," Kono began, "but he's on parole for possession and carrying a concealed weapon so we have a current address and a place of work too."

"Well Merry early Christmas to me!"

"Jason Mahmood." She brought up his mug shot, showing a sturdy but not oversize man with long dark hair. "Five ten, one hundred and eighty pounds. He's a Hawaiian native and lives in an apartment over by the University, but as far as I know he's not a registered student," Kono explained, "and he works at a place called Club 808? Sounds like a nightclub because he's a bouncer."

Steve tilted his head just slightly over the workplace, "What's the name?"

"Jason Mahmood."

"No, the place he works."

"Club 808," Kono repeated. "I've never heard of it, have you?"

"I'm not surprised you haven't. It's a strip club."

He purposely neglected to mention that Nikki used to work there. She wasn't involved, he told himself, shaking off that idea, considering it impossible. It was just a coincidence.

"And you obviously have heard of it," Kono said with a raised eyebrow. "Visited it too maybe?" her facial expression becoming disgusted. "I never pictured you as the strip club type of guy."

"Me either," Chin said with an equally disturbed look.

"I don't do strip clubs!" Steve quickly defended. "Danny however could probably tell us the layout of the joint," he teased.

"Don't get me involved in your messed up world, I've got a daughter, remember? Those places make my skin crawl."

"I went to school with the douchebag that owns the place," Steve explained. "Jimmy Ketchum is the name. Check him out too, Kono."

"Got it," she replied, writing it down. "Here's Mahmood's current address," she slipped a piece of paper over to him. "Do you want me and Chin to check out the home address or go visit the Club?"

"Actually neither. I don't want to show up at the business and start flashing our badges around. If anyone else from there is involved it could shut everything down. I'd like to get eyes on him and lets watch him for a couple of days to see if he can bring us the other three involved."

"Surveillance," Danny moaned. "I hate surveillance."

"And you're going to hate this one even more," Steve grinned. "I want you and Chin to check out the club as patrons."

"What?!"

"I can't go," he pointed out. "I'm sure Jimmy knows I'm a cop and I'm not sending Kono over there. That would just be mean."

"Thanks, Boss," she smiled.

"Kono, I want you to dig into that club and see what you can find out. I know its been raided a couple of times for drugs, but Jimmy always seemed to find a way to escape any personal responsibility."

"So what are you going to do?" Danny asked.

"I'm going to get warrants issued so we can search Jason's apartment, and then I'm going to wait for your report. If we can't get anything in the next couple of days then I'm going to bring Jason in and get it from him the old fashioned way."

"I say we just bring him in now," Danny argued.

"And risk the gang splitting up and then having to go on a man hunt for them? Let Jason bring them to us."

"And what if that was their last job and he skips town?"

"He was born and raised here. He's not going anywhere. But if it will make you happy, I'll get him on the no fly list, that way if he tries to flee, we'll nab him. Ok, Danny?"

"Fine," he blew out a breath.

"Ok then. You two have fun tonight and keep your eyes focused on the job and not the show," he smiled.

He thought of Nikki again and the coincidence between her place of work, the robbery and the Club 808. He felt strongly that it was just a coincidence, but the cop side of him felt uneasy for not letting the others know, but if he did, he'd have to tell them her back story and didn't want to do that to Nikki. For the time being they didn't need to know, and if the subject did come up then he wanted to be prepared with a definite answer to shut down any suspicion the others might have of her. He'd simply ask her when the last time she had spoken to Jimmy or been to Club 808, assured her answer would be five years…knowing in fact that it would be.

….

"It smells like stale smoke and cheap beer in here," Danny whispered as he took a seat at a table a few feet away from the stage at Club 808.

"It smells like depression and hopelessness to me," Chin added.

The topless waitress greeted them almost immediately, despite the room being practically filled, which was unexpected considering it was a Wednesday and only four thirty in the afternoon.

"Hi guys, what'll it be?"

"Longboard," Chin replied.

"Same," Danny agreed.

She turned and Danny leaned over to Chin, "I'm charging those beers to Steve's expense account."

Chin chuckled over that, glancing around the place, seeing Jason behind the bar. "Hey, there he is."

Danny casually turned in that direction. "The man of the hour, lucky break for us, I thought we'd have to sit here all day waiting for that scumbag to show up. Do you see what I see?" he asked Chin.

"The bandage on his right arm? I see it. I hope it hurts like hell."

Danny leaned back as the waitress set down the beers, taking a quick look at her torso that was practically in his face. He was after all a man and a naked woman was standing just inches away from him. He was on the job, he thought irritably, he wasn't dead.

"_I hate Steve,"_ he thought bitterly. "_I hope he's buried in paperwork right now."_

…

Nikki opened her door and smiled at Steve standing in her doorway.

"I wasn't sure you were going to make it."

She looked good, he thought, really good, beautiful in fact, surprised at just how much he had missed her that day.

"Am I too late?" he asked, hoping not.

She reached out and grabbed a hold of his shirt and pulled him inside, "Never too late."

He liked that move and told her so by greeting her with a kiss.

She undid the sash that held her robe closed, letting it fall open just enough for him to get a slight peek at her naked body.

He slid both hands inside and spread it open as his arms went around her back, pulling her up close and kissing her again.

She had been praying he'd make it over, not sure she'd make it through the night without this, missing him terribly all day. She'd texted him about a hundred times but only sent two; one at his request, telling him she'd made it home ok and the second to respond to his text that he was on his way over.

"We better take this in the bedroom," he whispered breathless, "or I'm going to lay you down right here, right now."

She slid her hands from around his neck and down over his chest, "Follow me," she purred, taking his hand and leading him down the hall of her apartment to her room.

He looked down at the hand that was holding his, feeling several different emotions all at once, excitement for what lied ahead, happiness for just being near her, but also guilt, knowing Danny was still on the job while he was there, but that didn't last long as she led him into her room and turned to him, slipping the robe off of her shoulders and letting it fall to the floor at her feet.

He'd never once, not one time had he ever let a woman take priority over his job, it was too important to him. It had never crossed his mind, and if they had ever raised a fuss about it, he knew then the relationship was doomed, but not with Nikki, he didn't feel that way this time. He'd chose to come here to be with her over his job and he didn't feel one bit of regret or guilt now that he was there.

This was all new to him, feeling a shift in his life that was headed in a direction he'd never been before. He didn't fight it, or question what the outcome might hold; he was enjoying it too much to jinx it by allowing himself to doubt his feelings toward her. She had him on the run and he'd chase after her no matter where it led him.

….

Steve rolled over on his back and slid his arm behind his head and the other one around Nikki as she snuggled up close to him, lying her head on his shoulder, both of them slightly sweaty but feeling extremely content at the moment.

His hand slowly caressed up and down her back, making her feel even more relaxed.

"Are you comfortable like this," she asked him.

"Sure. Why?"

She sat up on her elbow so she could see him. "I'm not sure I've quite got you figured out yet." She looked down shyly and then back up at him, "I think you're an amazing lover."

He let out a laugh over that highly unexpected comment, following it by blushing slightly over it as well. "Wow, well thank you. So are you."

She bent her head again, chuckling softly, "I mean, you come off as being a very strong willed, stubborn," she grinned, remembering that part of him that worked to her advantage five years before, "but when we're together," she blushed again, but he said he wanted to know her better so she decided to speak what she was feeling, "you're very gentle and I just feel like you know I'm there."

His expression turned perplexed, "I'm not sure I know what you mean. Of course I know you're there."

She bit her bottom lip, "I know, but I guess what I'm trying to say is that I've been with men, not a lot," she quickly pointed out, "but they always seem to fade away sometime in the middle of sex and I feel like they don't see me anymore, just my body. But with you…" she moved up closer to him. "I feel like you are there the whole time. You don't fade away from me."

His hand came from behind his head and touched her face, liking what she had just said. It was true; he was even guilty for being the type of guy that she had described being with, but with her he felt a connection that kept him focused solely on her. He hadn't even realized it, and may not have until she pointed it out so elegantly to him.

"I like you," he said candidly. "I don't think that it's a conscious thing that I do, it just comes naturally when I'm with you."

His reply couldn't have been any better.

"I like you too." She really loved him and had for five years, but it was too soon to say, hoping that someday she would not only have the guts but also the opportunity to say it to him and even more hopeful that she'd get the same reply back, but for now she was thrilled to just be lying in his arms.

He thought about the question he wanted to ask her about Jimmy, but now wasn't the time. He was in no hurry anyway for an answer he already knew. So he chose a different question.

"What are you doing this weekend?" he asked her.

She sat up on her elbow again so she could see him. "Hopefully spending it with you."

He tried to conceal how that made him feel but it was hard to do, rolling her over and hovering over top of her with a sexy grin, "I was thinking maybe we could take a trip up to the North Shore and do some snorkeling and just hang out. It's my favorite place on the island and I haven't been up there in a while. No phones, no distractions."

She ran her hand down the side of his face, "Just us?"

He leaned down and kissed her, "Just us."

"That sounds nice. I'd like that."

He brushed his lips overtop of hers. "It's a date then," he whispered and then kissed her, moving his body on top of her as she welcomed him.

…

Nikki poured a cup of coffee and leaned back against Steve as he came up behind her, kissing her on the neck.

"Good morning."

She giggled over the whiskers that tickled her neck. "Good morning."

She turned around and handed him a cup of coffee.

"Thank you. I'm going to need it today. You wore me out last night."

Nikki bent her head and chuckled over that. "I'd like to wear you out tonight too, if you're free?"

He set the coffee down and put his arms around her. "I'm up for that challenge."

She hugged him as he pulled her in close.

"I wish the jewelry store would hurry up and open," she whined. "I'm tired of all the remodeling work and endless phone calls to the contractors and the insurance company."

"It could be worse. You could be looking for another job."

"That's true," she admitted wholeheartedly. "I'm very lucky I stumbled across this one. The Franklin's are good people, better than most employers I've had."

He rained in on that last statement, deciding now would be a good time to ask her about Jimmy.

"You've had at least one bad employer that I know of. Jimmy Ketchum."

Nikki rolled her eyes, "Oh God yes. He was the worst."

"When was the last time you talked him?" Steve casually asked.

Nikki shrugged and looked away from him, reaching for the coffee pot. "I haven't seen or talked to him since that day you picked me up from jail," she lied, feeling a wave of guilt over it. "It makes me cringe just thinking about it."

It was the answer he had been expecting, not surprised in the least when she said it.

"You're a different person now. I can attest to that."

"You were the main reason behind it."

"No, you were," he corrected her. "I just held your hand through it."

"I didn't want to disappoint you. I stayed because I wanted to make you happy. I had such a crush on you," she confessed.

She had surprised him after all, "You did?! I didn't know that."

"Of course not, why would you. I was just some mousy little head case girl that was a pain in your ass."

"You were never a pain in my ass, Nikki." He reached out and put a hand on her arm, "And you never will be."

Here he was all over again she thought, the same person that was so good to her. How could she have lied to him about Jimmy? She was on the verge of telling him when he had first asked her and wanted to confess her lie even now, but didn't. She didn't want him to think she was back in that life again, because she wasn't. She was too fearful she would lose him, and she had arrived at that place in her heart where she would do just about anything to keep him, even lie about Jimmy Ketchum.

…

"Hey," Danny said coming in to Steve's office holding a white piece of computer paper. "I need to talk to you."

Steve flipped open his laptop, "Sorry I was late this morning, it won't happen again." He didn't give him a reason why he was late, but tried to conceal the smile from the memory of it, wishing he were back in bed with Nikki again, missing her already.

"I think I can handle you being late once a year," Danny said, but he was still surprised over his departure the night before after he and Chin had gone to the club. Steve usually wanted to be in the center of everything.

"How did it go last night at Club 808?"

"Not bad. We got eyes on Jason Mahmood. He even had a bandage on his upper right arm. He's pretty friendly with the owner. This Jimmy Ketchup guy that you went to school with looks pretty shady. They were communicating quite a bit last night. I just have a feeling he's in on it. Intuition I guess."

"Well I trust your instincts," Steve replied.

"Well you may not like my next one though," he cringed slightly. "I have something that you may not want to see."

That got his attention, "What is it?"

He set the piece of paper in his hand on Steve's desk. "You said the Club 808 had been busted a couple of times over the years, well to be exact, it's been raided three times. I ran a report for the names of the arrests that were made and one in particular came up." He pointed down at a name on the piece of paper.

Steve looked down and felt his heart drop to his stomach. The name he was pointing at was Nicole R. Riley.

"That's Nikki, Steve. She was arrested for possession of heroine. The charges were later dropped but she used to work there. I'm assuming she was a stripper." He waited for the shock to cross Steve's face but it never came, instead he stood up and came around his desk and closed his office door.

"I know she used to work there," he finally spoke. "My dad's the one that got the charges dropped."

It was Danny that held the shocked expression. "You knew, and you didn't tell me? Why?! That's a serious piece of information that you're holding back. The manager of the store robbed used to work with someone we have under investigation and you don't consider that worth while information?"

"I didn't tell you because of that reaction right there. She's not involved Danny."

"How do you know?"

"Because I asked her?"

His mouth dropped open, "You told her about Mahmood?"

"No, of course not. I simply asked her when the last time was that she spoke or saw Jimmy and she said it was the day she was arrested at the bar five years ago."

"And you believe her?" he practically laughed.

"Yes I believe her," he replied firmly. "And for the record she was never a stripper. She was a waitress." Steve sighed, "Look, it's a long story of how we met, but in the end she turned her life around."

Danny sat down in the chair across from his desk. "I like long stories, so start from the beginning and don't leave anything out."

…...

Twenty minutes later Steve had finally put a cap on the story of he and Nikki's past relationship, but wasn't sure he had convinced Danny to drop the accusation against her.

"Hmm," was his only reaction after Steve laid his hands out and said 'that's it.'

"What do you mean, 'hmm,'" Steve repeated the throaty hum from his partner. "You still don't believe her?"

"Don't you think it's an incredible coincidence though?"

"Yes," Steve admitted, "I do. I also think it was an incredible coincidence that she and I ran into each other the way we did at the robbery, especially since I was just thinking about her the night before even though I hadn't seen her in over five years. I also think its a coincidence that she showed up at my father's grave the same time as me. Coincidences happen everyday, Danny, it doesn't make people criminals," Steve argued.

'_Holy shit_,' Danny thought to himself, realizing just then why Steve's argument was so adamant. '_He really likes this girl.' _It was the only explanation considering the fact that he'd known him for almost three years and never had he acted so callous over a case or a potential witness that looked involved. If this had been anyone besides Nikki, he was sure that Steve would be on board with his theory 110%.

Danny felt strongly that there would be no more discussion on the matter without Steve blowing up. That much he knew. He was not only defending Nikki's innocence he was protecting their relationship. He only hoped that all these 'coincidences' were in fact just that and not her playing him.

"Ok, Steve," he said passively. "I see the point you're making and I trust your judgment."

"Thank you."

But what Danny neglected to point out, was that he also thought a beautiful woman, who obviously had him smitten, was clouding his judgment.

He wanted to ask Steve one question though that was bothering him. If he was so adamant on knowing she wasn't involved with Jason or the Club 808, then why didn't he tell her about the lead? Why keep that from her? It was police textbook sense 101; you never give away a lead to someone that might be involved. You just didn't. He didn't think for a second that Steve was covering for her. He believed him when he said that he believed Nikki, which brought him to the only conclusion he could think of. Steve didn't want Nikki to think that he thought her a suspect, the same reason that he had Kono interview her the day of the robbery. It was just as he had suspected. Steve's head was not in the game but focused on Nikki Riley. He however felt it necessary to take the extra step and see if she was really telling the truth, or using Steve as a pawn, hoping that wasn't the case.

"How much longer are we going to watch this guy before we bring him in?" Danny asked.

He didn't need to verbally hear it from Danny to know what he was thinking. He was skeptical of her, hating that he was but he understood why too. He would have been the same if the tables were turned. The only solution was to bring in Jason and see if they could make him give up the others. That was going to be the only way to convince Danny and take Nikki out of the equation.

"Let's bring him in."

That reply surprised Danny, "Now? I thought you wanted to sit on him for a while?"

"The Governor wants an arrest made, so lets make one."

That set off all kinds of alarms to Danny as well. Steve had never compromised his investigation tactics to please anyone, not even the Governor. He was looking for a quick fix to clear Nikki's name. That was just too obvious.

For the first time since partnering up with him he was going to go behind Steve's back, risking not only his partnership with him but also potentially damaging their friendship. But in this instance he felt that the word 'coincidence' might very well lead to the word 'suspect'.


	12. Chapter 12

_**My appologies for the long delay. I'm moving and had no internet for almost a week! UGH!**_

**Chapter Twelve**

Nikki stood facing the ocean and waited as Steve came up a couple of minutes later carrying two smoothies that he'd bought from the beach shack along the boardwalk. They walked along Queen's Beach that was located south of Waikiki and mostly inhabited by locals who lived in the condos further south toward Diamond Head.

"Strawberry mango," he said, handing her the smoothie.

"Yum, thank you. What did you get?" she asked leaning over to get a look at his topless plastic cup.

"Pineapple, banana and strawberry." He moved the straw in her direction as she accepted his offer, taking a sip of it.

"Mmm, that's good!"

"Do you want to switch?" he asked.

She kissed him on the cheek for that sweet offer. "No, but thank you anyways. You enjoy yours."

They did just that, enjoying each other before having to go their separate ways, him to work and she to the shop to meet the contractor.

"I booked a place for the night this weekend on the North Shore," Steve announced. "I'll pick you up tomorrow morning at about eight? We'll beat the traffic over."

Nikki smiled, eagerly anticipating the weekend alone with him, "Sounds good." She looked over at him as they strolled, "I want to do something else this weekend too, if you don't mind, while we are up at the North Shore?"

He put his arm around her waist, pulling her close, "Sure, anything you want. What is it?"

"Now that I finally feel closure after hearing how Stuart died, I want to spread his ashes over this little beach on the hike out to Ka'ena Point. We used to go there with my Dad when we were little and spend the day playing in the water." She stopped walking, suddenly overcome by the memories that could catch her off guard. "Stuart and I spread my Dad's ashes there too."

Steve could see the sadness engulf her right before his eyes, putting a gentle hand on her face to try and ease her some, but similar memories were bouncing off of her and hammering him just as hard. "I know exactly what little beach you are talking about. I've been there too, with my Mom and Dad and little sister."

She looked up at him, surprised over that revelation. "The one about halfway down…" she began.

"Hidden by the brush," he finished.

"Yes," she whispered, "that's the one."

"Coincidences just seem to follow us, don't they?" he smiled, leaning in and giving her a kiss.

"Are they though?" she replied back. "Maybe they aren't coincidences after all, because what I'm feeling right now doesn't feel like it was brought on by chance. It feels real." She wanted to say she loved him so badly, but was scared. "I've never been happier than I am right now being with you."

He nodded, agreeing with her wholeheartedly. "Me too, Nikki. I like where this is going, it's comfortable for me, being with you. I've never had that before."

She knew him well enough to know that he didn't wear his heart on his sleeve and like his father he was a kind and generous person, but when it came to expressing emotions neither one of them were very articulate at it, but what he just said to her spoke volumes. He was happy and wanting to move forward, and moving forward could only mean love was in his future if it hadn't already arrived.

They didn't take into consideration the joggers running by them or the surfers carrying boards on their way out to catch a wave, they took this moment for what it was, a declaration of commitment to each other and sealed it with a kiss as they stood on the boardwalk.

…..

"Ok!" Steve shouted out to Danny, Chin and Kono as he came through the doors of the office, "Lets go get our guy!" He was in a good mood having just left Nikki; no he was in an exceptional mood. He past by Chin's door first and smiled in at him, "Hey, get suited up."

He kept going and said the same thing to Kono and then saw Danny standing by the computer table.

"Ready?" Steve said to him as the other two came down the hall and joined them there. "Let's get this done."

He went straight for the gun cabinet not noticing the other three that had yet to join him or say a word.

"I say we wait for Mahmood to come home and catch him before going in, that way…" he turned after grabbing his vest and was caught off guard by the three of them just standing there staring at him. "What going on? Let's go!"

Kono and Chin both looked at Danny for guidance as he continued to stare at Steve, his expression becoming almost saddened. "We need to talk, Steve," he finally spoke.

Steve held the Kevlar vest as he walked over to them, "Ok, what's up? Damn it," he cringed, "there wasn't another robbery was there?"

Danny shook his head, bracing both hands on the table, "No, but you're not going to like what I have to tell you."

"What?" he looked bewildered from Danny to Kono and then to Chin, neither one of them giving away any information but both held the same distraught expression as Danny. "Will someone tell me what the hell is going on?" his voice becoming distressed over whatever bad news they had to offer up.

"I'm sorry man," Danny said, typing out something on the computer as the information came up on the screen.

Steve looked up at the monitor hanging on the wall as two phone statements came up, highlighted in yellow were a couple of different phone numbers. "What is that?"

Danny cleared his throat to make sure he got it out the first time, loud and clear. "Nikki's cell phone records and…"

Steve's face instantly showed his anger over that, "You pulled her records? What the hell, Danny! We talked about this already and you still went behind my back? I thought you were my partner?!"

"I am! And I'm also your friend and I see your judgment when it comes to this girl being clouded."

"What?! I already told you, I explained it to you why she was at that club. It was five years ago; she's changed since then. She's not the same person!"

"Are you sure about that?"

"Yes! You little smart ass!" Steve fired back, feeling his anger building over Danny's betrayal. "What happened five years ago has nothing to do with this robbery. She hasn't seen or spoken to him since then. I told you that, so quit trying to wrap her up in this mess because she made a mistake five years ago!"

Danny went over to the monitor and used his finger to point out the yellow highlighted numbers. "These numbers aren't from five years ago. This is the number from Club 808, dialed out to Nikki's cell phone two months ago." He pointed at the next statement, "This is the number to Jimmy Ketchum's cell phone, called not only from Nikki's cell phone, but she also made another call from the jewelry store the day before." He looked over at Steve who stared at the monitors, "She was in contact with him three different times. And if you look at incoming calls, Jimmy's number appears several times to the store and on Nikki's cell phone."

Steve felt like he'd been punched in the gut as he stared at the evidence of her betrayal, not Danny's.

Danny's voice calmed, "She lied when she told you she hadn't spoken to Jimmy Ketchum in five years." He could only imagine what Steve was feeling at the moment, but his facial expression gave him an idea.

He looked up at the phone records on the screen again, "These were made two months ago?" he asked in a low demanding tone.

"Yes," Danny replied, hearing the anger in his voice.

"Anything more recent?"

"No."

He walked over to the screen, looking up at the numbers highlighted in yellow. He could argue that maybe she had forgotten, but if it had been only one call then that might have had a leg to stand on, but several calls crushed any argument he could have made in her defense, leaving him with nothing but the humiliating fact that not only had she lied to him, it now made it seem like she was playing him as well. '_Keep your friends close_,' he thought, '_but keep your enemies closer._'

His mind was reeling, replaying the scene in his head of them standing in her kitchen when she told him she hadn't spoken to Jimmy since the day she left jail five years before. He tried to picture her face when she said it, seeing if he could recall any kind of sign that he had overlooked, explaining how or why he had missed it. He was lied to almost everyday by criminals and had become almost an expert on knowing when and if a person was lying to him, but Danny was right, his judgment when it came to Nikki had been clouded. He didn't believe she could have been involved, or maybe he just didn't want to believe it. He was falling in love with her and thought it had been equal on both sides, but it was all bullshit.

He turned around and looked at the faces of his three partners, all of which looked back at him in a way that they never had before, and in a way he never ever wanted them too. With sympathy and awkwardness, making him feel all the more humiliated by this turn of events. He wanted to go someplace and hideaway so he could process what was happening, but feared that would just make him look all the more ridiculous. So instead he tried to put his head back into work.

"Good job, Danny," he said to him in a mono tone voice, swallowing down his pride, "I guess we might have another suspect then. Did you pull Jason Mahmood phone records too? Is there any communication between he and…" he paused, gritting his teeth, "Nikki?" '_Jesus,_' he thought, '_she almost tricked me into loving her.'_

"No," Chin replied. "But we did find a lot of communication between Jason, Jimmy and another employee at the bar, Randy Miller." He pulled up an old mug shot of him. "He was arrested the same night Nikki was. He only had small bag of weed on him and was sentenced to sixty hours of community service. Nothing since then."

"I recognize him," Steve said. "He was a bouncer back then, maybe he still is. I don't know. Do you think he's involved?" He asked the question but didn't hear the reply, his thoughts too wound up over Nikki, picturing them in bed together. The intimacy seemed real, so real it stunned him even more that she could fake it that much.

"They had several calls between them," Chin explained, "leading up to the day before each robbery and then nothing for about a week after."

Chin and the others waited for a reply or a reaction from him, but nothing came even though it was clear he was thinking about something.

Danny took the initiative, knowing as well as the others where his head really was. He was his partner, but like he had said earlier, he was also his friend and new very well that even though Steve was trying his damnedest to look like he wasn't effected by the turn of events, Danny knew otherwise, and was pretty sure that Chin and Kono knew as well. He had feelings for Nikki, strong feelings. He wasn't sure if it was love just yet, but it was headed that way.

He looked at Chin and Kono and motioned with his head for them to vacate the area, which they both were more than happy to do.

"I'm going to see about getting the bank records for Mahmood," Chin said.

"And I have a call to return to…" Kono said, drawing a blank, "the court," she blurted out and turned, walking toward her office as Chin followed her, both going to their separate ones and closing the door.

Once out of earshot Danny turned to him, "I'm sorry I went behind your back, Steve. I just felt that…"

"It's ok," he interrupted, "I probably would have done the same thing." He leaned back against the computer running his hands over his face. "God, what the hell happened?" he slid his fingers down, resting them over his mouth as he looked at Danny, "How could I have let her con me like that, Danny?"

"She didn't con you."

He threw his hands up, "She lied to me! She lied right to my face! And here I was defending her honor by using words like coincidence. What a schmuck. I'm the one that should be apologizing to you. There is no such thing as coincidences," he said bitterly, "everything happens for a reason. I should know that by now. She's quick on her feet too. I bet the second she saw me walk in that store after the burglary she planned the whole thing out. Get me sidetracked!" He slammed his fist down on the table, "She fucking played me Danny!"

"Calm down. We don't know yet how involved she is, or if she is."

"Of course she is! You knew from the beginning that she was. You said it yourself; it's an incredible coincidence. And think about it Danny, two months ago is when all the calls went down. It would be about the right amount of time to plan a robbery."

"I think you're pissed and you need to take the rest of the night and cool your jets."

"We're supposed to be going away for the weekend tomorrow," he said angrily.

"What are you going to say to her?"

"I don't know."

"Go home. Let it sink in and get your head together. Go for a swim and by morning you'll know what to do."

He took his advice but come the next morning after a restless night he still felt the treachery and was no closer to an outcome than he had been the day before when he'd found out. She'd lied to him, straight up lied, which left him with only one conclusion. She had something to hide by doing so.

He wanted to confront her. He needed to. He didn't care, nor was he thinking about the job. She'd brought his personal life into it and compromised his credibility with his team. If he hadn't fought so hard for her in the beginning then he might have been able to deal with it, but she humiliated him and that's what he couldn't get over.

…..

Nikki heard the knock on her door from the bedroom as she finished packing. She stuck her head out and yelled to him.

"Its open Steve, c'mon in!"

She went back to the suitcase and closed it, not hearing him enter, wondering if maybe that wasn't him, but couldn't imagine who it would be at this time of the morning.

She opened the door, surprised to see him standing there in his work clothes, assuming he got called in and was going to have to cancel.

"Hi," she sighed disappointingly. "Do you have to work instead?"

"I'm choosing to go to work rather than spend the weekend with you."

She tilted her head, confused over his answer and the nasty tone in which it was delivered. "What's wrong? Are you mad?"

"I don't like being lied to, Nikki. I don't like being used and I especially don't like being made a fool of."

"What are you talking about? I haven't lied to you."

He took a step closer to her, seeing a neighbor come out of their apartment and walk toward the elevator. He whispered between gritted teeth. "You told me you haven't spoken to Jimmy Ketchum in five years! Do you want to stick with that lie or maybe try again for a better one?"

She was stunned over that, never having guessed in a million years that he would ever find out about it. "Steve," she said feeling winded, seeing the anger all over him. "I…I did lie to you about that, I'm sorry. I just…"

"You made me look like a fool in front of my team! I protected you and it turns out you were lying to me and I had to find out from them!"

"Protect me? Protect me from what? I don't understand."

"If you have knowledge of the robbery then I suggest you turn yourself in, but if you were directly involved with it then don't think for a second that I won't arrest you and throw your ass in jail!"

She stepped back feeling her legs begin to tremble as she shook her head in shock and confusion. "I'm not involved. I don't know what happened but you have to believe me Steve, I'm not involved."

"It's just a coincidence isn't it that a person from his club is under investigation for the robbery and another coincidence that you spoke with Jimmy Ketchum two months ago and then lie to my face about it! You're hiding something Nikki but I promise you, I'll find out what it is and you'll be doing time right along with everyone else involved."

"Oh my God, Steve," she started to cry, "you're confused. Please…" she begged as she began to sob, not so much over the accusation, knowing she was innocent, but because the fear of losing him was worse.

"I'm not confused," he growled pointing at her, "I'm on to you now."

She reached out for his hand as she began to panic, wanting to bring him inside so she could explain herself, but he quickly moved it away.

"Think about your options. My advice to you is get a lawyer."

He walked away, going for the stairs, needing to put distance between he and Nikki Riley. His anger was still apparent but as he stood there with her and she began to cry he started to feel something he didn't want to, empathy.

He stopped halfway down the six flights and leaned back against the wall, bending over and bracing his hands on his knees as the impact of the situation began to really sink in. He'd fallen in love with her. He was sure of it now; otherwise he wouldn't be feeling the loss the way he was. He tried to tell himself it was all an illusion, but even so, it had been a good one because he'd fallen for it hook, line and sinker. He couldn't deny the feelings he had for her. They had been real even if it was all a lie; he'd felt something for her that he never had with anyone else.

Nikki closed the door and leaned back against it as she sank down to the floor in a flood of tears, trying to piece together everything that had just happened. She put her hand over her heart feeling the brunt of his attack hit her brutally hard in that very spot.

….

Steve stood at the computer table at work and typed in the name Jimmy Ketchum after doing some of his own investigating. He came straight to the office after leaving Nikki's, putting all his energy into Jimmy, needing to keep his mind occupied and off of Nikki.

"What did you find out," Danny asked as he, Chin and Kono all came out to meet him after being summoned.

"Ketchum took out a big loan about three years ago," Steve began, "to do some remodeling on the club. He almost went into Chapter 11 a year ago but bounced back and after being late on the loan payment almost every single month, he hasn't been late once in the last three months."

"Five months huh," Kono repeated, "that's about the time of the first smash and grab robbery at the Gold Dust pawn shop."

"Yep," Steve agreed. " I think we have another sus…" he froze mid-sentence staring at the front entrance.

The other three looked at him queerly and then turned their heads to see what had him so mesmerized. All three of them joined his shocked expression seeing Nikki slowly walking toward them, her focus on Steve.

She stopped several feet away from them all.

"I'm sorry I lied to you," she said to him first, and then moved her eyes to each individual, "too all of you I guess. I'm guilty of that, but I'm not guilty for a crime you think I was trying to hide. The only other thing I'm really guilty of is falling in love," her eyes moved back to Steve's, "with you. I lied because I didn't want you to think that I was involved in any way with that life again, because I'm not." She looked directly at Danny now, "Five years ago I was a different person. I was addicted to heroin and I worked at Club 808. My life was in a downward spiral, but I got help," she paused, not making eye contact with Steve but she could feel his eyes on her, "from a friend of my brothers who got me back on my feet. Two months ago Jimmy Ketchum came into the jewelry store. It was the first time I'd seen him in five years. I think he was just as surprised to see me, as I was to see him. He said he wanted to buy a watch. I kept the small talk at a minimal not caring to share any of my personal life with him, and not giving a rat's ass about his either. He ended up leaving empty handed but was persistent about wanting to get together for a drink which I declined, all three times that he asked me. The next day he called me at the store and left a message that he wanted one of the expensive watches he had looked at, but when I called him back he didn't want to talk about the watch, so I hung up. He had picked up one of my business cards off the counter that had my cell phone number on it and began calling it next. He wouldn't leave me alone so I called him back a total of one time and told him never to call me again or I was going to contact the police." She looked over at Steve again. "I never spoke to him again."

They all looked at Steve then for some kind of response expecting it to come from him, but he said nothing.

"You can arrest me if you want. I'll cooperate any way I can. I'll take a lie detector test to prove to you that I was not involved in that robbery, nor am I with Jimmy Ketchum."

She waited, but he wasn't going to say anything to her. She had taken a chance but it had failed. He was never going to believe her or forgive her. She could feel the tears begin to well in her eyes, biting her bottom lip to stop it from quivering, not sure what was going to happen next.

"Am I…" she paused, looking down as her voice broke, quickly wiping away the moisture from her eyes, looking back up but unable to face him, so she focused on Danny once again. "Am I under arrest, or can I go?" She just wanted to run out of there so badly, being near him and knowing how he felt about her was worse than being accused.

Danny looked at Steve again, who just stood there staring at her as if his body were there but his mind was someplace a million miles away.

"No," Danny said to her, "you're not under arrest. Thank you for coming down and explaining that to us, Nikki. You're free to go."

She turned on her heel and practically ran for the door; just as the tears broke lose.

The three of them waited again for something from him until Kono finally spoke up. "I believe her."

"She convinced me," Chin agreed.

"I think we can take her off the list," Danny settled it. He waited still for something from Steve and then finally asked him, "What do you think, Steve?"

Her confession was still floating around him, not the one about her innocence, but the revelation of why she had lied to him. It was for reasons as harmless as could be and he had treated her like a common criminal because of it. The things he'd said to her at her apartment were tearing through him, ripping his heart apart.

"Steve," Danny said again.

"I need a minute," was all he said, turning and going for his office. He closed the heavy glass door behind him and sat down in the oversized leather chair behind his desk and turned it toward the wall, away from prying eyes, running his hands down over his face. His expression was mortified and then all at once a smile slowly grew in its place. Her reasoning behind the lie was the cause of it. The smile quickly faded again as he recalled the harsh treatment at her apartment.

"What just happened here," he whispered, "think." But he couldn't concentrate. The computer in his head that was always alert and able to sort out even the most complex situations was disorganized, never having to involve his emotions in such a way when it came to work.

The others believed her, did he? Was she playing him again? She sounded sincere and was cooperative, unlike someone who was guilty. What was his obligation to his team? They relied on him and he'd felt he'd let them down by getting involved with her, but what if she was telling the truth? Then it would be up to him to seek her out. Is that what he wanted? He wasn't sure.

The confusion came flooding back again. He had to admit that when she first confessed that she was indeed in love with him, it was heartfelt and despite his anger it made him feel good and when the tears came, once again he felt torn apart.

He did believe her he finally admitted to himself, but now as it settled and it was his turn to respond to her, he became terrified.

She was in love with him. There was no room for doubt; she had made it crystal clear. What was his next move? If he wanted her like he knew he did then there was only one move to make.

His hands began to sweat as he wiped them off on his pants, dragging them up and down over his thighs, feeling his heart rate begin to soar, his body reacting to the dilemma he was facing. His lungs felt constricted as if a five hundred pound weight was lying across his chest. His line of sight became blurred as well.

"Hey," Danny said concerned as he came around the chair after knocking on the door and getting no response. "Steve!" he said again, seeing the heavy panting and sweat building on his forehead.

He looked up at him with an expression that Danny could only describe as frightful. "I can't…breathe."

Danny chuckled and took him by the back of the neck and bent him over, putting his head between his legs. "You're having a panic attack! Just relax and breathe slowly." He'd seen it before several times while interviewing suspects.

Steve rested his forehead in the palms of his hands and tried to control the rapid breathing as instructed, feeling Danny's hand trying to calm him and instruct him at the same time to take in deep breathes and let them out slowly.

He felt calmer after a minute or so and sat back in the chair with his eyes closed.

"You ok, Buddy?" Danny halfheartedly laughed, unable to contain himself over the situation that was just too amusing for him to hide. The great and powerful Steve McGarrett was having a panic attack over a girl. "Just relax, it's ok. She just loves you, that's not a bad thing."

He opened his eyes and looked at him. "I think I might have made a mistake…going to her apartment."

He put a hand on his shoulder, "I know, me too. I'm sorry."

"You're right," Steve said angrily, "This is your fault! You got me started on it!"

"How was I supposed to know you were going to go over to her house half cocked and start accusing her?! Don't blame that on me!"

"Oh god," Steve moaned, bending over again. "I feel sick. I was such a prick to her."

"You didn't help the matter either by standing out there like an unemotional rock."

He sat back up again, looking at his partner distastefully, "Will you shut up! You're not helping me now!"

"What's to help with?" Danny chuckled, "If you don't know what to do then…" he flung his arms up in frustration, "then you don't deserve her, or anybody else."

"I need to talk to her," Steve replied, looking up at him for direction as if that was more of a question than a statement.

"That would be a good start."

He turned his chair around, facing his desk. "Where's my phone?"

"You can't call her?" Danny huffed.

"You just agreed that I need to talk to her!"

"I wouldn't say this is an over the phone conversation. This should be face to face."

Steve pondered that theory for a second and then shot out of his chair. "You're right. I'll go to her apartment. The scene of the real crime," he grumbled and then blew out a disgruntled breath.

He filtered around his desk for his car keys when Danny reached in his pocket and held up the keys to the Camaro, "Here just take my car and go."

Steve snatched them out of his hand with an appreciative grin, "Thanks, Danny."

"Yea, yea, just fill it up before you bring it back."

…..

Steve arrived at her apartment fifteen minutes later and hesitated for only a moment before knocking. He felt his hands begin to sweat again but avoided another panic attack only because on the drive over he became more and more assured that Nikki was exactly what he'd always been looking for and knowing that made the prospect of her proposal and perhaps his return one a little less scary.

He knocked again, assured she was avoiding him.

"Nikki," he said calmly through the door, "it's Steve. I'm sorry. Please open the door."

He waited but heard no movement inside.

He walked away and pulled out his cell phone, calling Danny.

"I'm at her apartment. She's not here," he told him, his voice sounding desperate, "or she hates me and won't open the door."

"Well," Danny said uneasily, "I could run a trace on her cell phone and tell you where she's at. Should I do that?"

Steve paced back and forth in the hall in front of her apartment and then stopped, contemplating his suggestion, but the need to see her outweighed his argument over whether or not it was the right thing to do. "Ok, yes. Just this one time."

"Ok, I'll call you back in a couple of minutes."

He went down the stairs of her building and came out to the car as his cell rang.

"Did you find her?" he asked him, hoping she wasn't at home and not answering her door.

"Yea," he replied, a little surprised by her location. "She's on Kaukonahua Rd, Highway 803**,** it looks like she's headed to the North Shore."

Steve sighed, "Ok thanks. I think I know exactly where she's going. I'll talk to you later."

"Good luck," Danny replied before hanging up.

…

Steve drove down Farrington Highway on the North Shore, passing Dillingham Air Field until the pavement ended.

He spotted Nikki's car just as he had suspected in the small parking area of Ka'ena Point amongst a couple of locals and the touristy ones, which he could spot a mile away. Three convertible Mustangs and a Jeep with the top off.

He took the spot next to her car and got out.

The trail to the southern most tip of the island was a beautiful one as it followed the rocky coast, but he wasn't interested in any of it except a little beach about half a mile down, hidden by some tall brush.

He went past the barrier that explained the rules of the State Park and Bird Sanctuary at the end, headed in the direction that was the shortest distance to the beach, using the coastal edge rather than the actual trail.

He went over the plan in his head that he had created on the drive over as he jumped from rock to rock and over small ravines barely escaping waves that washed up at the same time.

Less than ten minutes later he saw it ahead and slowed his pace, making his way through the brush. He came out in the opening of the small beach and saw her sitting in the sand facing the water about thirty feet in front of him with an urn sitting next to her.

"Nikki," he called out.

She turned around and quickly got to her feet, shocked to see him.

"What are you doing here?" her face turning white with fear, "Am I under arrest?"

His expression became just as perplexed and then realized he was still in his work clothes, complete with a gun on his hip, which he put his hand over as if trying to conceal it.

"No!" he quickly assured her. "Of course not."

She blinked as he came toward her, reeling over the fact that he had just appeared out of nowhere, catching her completely off guard. "Why then?"

He realized that his presence must have been startling, seeing now confusion take place of the fear.

"I wanted to find you and…" as he came toward her the speech he'd made on his drive over vanished from his thoughts. The sheer beauty of her standing before him overcame him. Her hair gently blew in the breeze that came off the water and her eyes that stared at him were puffy and her nose red. He didn't have to be a detective to know that she had been crying, nor did he have to decipher the reason for it, it was because of him.

"Those things I said to you…" he felt for the first time that maybe she wouldn't forgive him, "I'm sorry, Nikki."

She came toward him, feeling every bit of her pain and suffering over losing him disappear, seeing clearly in his eyes and the tone of his voice that he was indeed remorseful.

He swallowed hard, feeling his heart begin to beat rapidly again, "I shouldn't have…"

"Stop!" she said as she stood in front of him, "enough with the apologizes."

He wanted to take a step back not able to get a read on her, but felt like his feet were frozen in the sand.

"It was my fault. I understand now why you were so angry. People lie to you everyday and you expect that, but not from someone who…" she hesitated and then decided to just come clean forgoing anymore fabrication from the actual truth, it had already caused enough damage, "from someone who loves you."

"There's that word again," he gently grabbed her by both arms. "Are you sure? I mean," he let go and used his hands as if showing himself off, "look at me! I'm impatient. I'm stubborn. I'm impulsive." He shook his head, "I don't trust people that I should. Is that what you really want?"

"Yes," Nikki chuckled, "you are all of those things." She stepped closer to him, reaching out and taking his hand, "But you are also generous, and kind, and compassionate and despite what you may think about earlier today, you are also good to me." She moved up closer to him as he put his free hand around her back, "And you are easy on the eyes too. I just wanted to throw that out there." She was glad that made him smile.

"You're crazy." He brought the hand that was holding his up to his lips and kissed it. "I am sorry, Nikki."

"I know. So am I."

He kissed her lips next and then hugged her tenderly, holding her a little longer than normal, feeling lucky to be the recipient of the return gesture from her.

His hugs were special and made her feel that way too. He might have all those characteristics that he had rattled off, but she didn't consider them flaws as he did, on the contrary, they were just many of the wonderful things that had made him into the man that she had fallen in love with.

He followed her back over to where she had been sitting with Stuart's ashes.

"Did you do it yet?" he asked of her spreading of his ashes.

"No. I thought it might make me feel better if I did, but I wanted to be in a better frame of mind when I did it."

"Are you now?" he asked, hoping he had remedied that.

She leaned into him, "Yes."

"Do you still want to do it, or do you want to wait for another day?"

She looked up at him; "I want to do it now."

He bent over and picked up the urn and twisted the top off, handing it to her.

She took it from him and reached inside for the small scoop that was put in there to help distribute them easier.

She scooped up a generous amount and stepped away from Steve and gently shook them out as some blew in the breeze but the majority spread over the sand.

"You were the best brother anyone could have ever asked for," she said. "I love you and I'm glad that you are safe now from anymore danger or pain."

She looked over at Steve to ask him if he wanted to spread any but didn't need to. He reached for the scoop and filled it, walking toward the water, letting small amounts fall out onto the sand and making sure some caught the breeze as he spoke.

"Sea, air and land. SEAL brothers to the end, Stuart. You made the greatest sacrifice there is, and you will never, ever be forgotten." He walked out to the surf, not caring that he was still fully dressed, letting the remains fall in the water. The image of that fateful day came flooding back but for the first time he didn't feel guilt, instead he felt the loss of his friend. The gruesome images were replaced with happier times when they had laughed and shared stories of home. He missed him then more than he had at any time, feeling his emotions getting the better of him because of it.

Nikki came up and stood next to him in the knee high water with tears streaming down her face. She looked up at him and could see the same teetering on him as well.

She took out the scoop and they both held on to the urn and tipped it upside down in the gentle surf as it spilled out. The water at their feet turned grey as the granules spread out and mixed with the crystal blue. They watched it until it disappeared.

Nikki let him take the urn and leaned into him as he put an arm around her.

"I was lucky to have known him," Steve said to her.

"Me too," she whimpered, burying her face in his chest as he held her closer.

….

They stayed on the beach for a time just sitting back and reminiscing about Stuart. Steve got a better recollection of him before his Navy days from stories that Nikki shared and Nikki learned so much more about him from Steve.

The walk back was slow, as they talked some more about anything and everything.

As they stood outside Nikki's car Steve closed the trunk after wrapping up Stuart's urn in a blanket in the back of it.

"I was thinking," he began as he came around to the driver's side where she was standing. "Why don't you go check in to the place I rented for the night. I have to drive back anyway, so I could pick up your bag at your house and meet you there later on this afternoon."

Nikki smiled over that idea. "Ok, I wasn't sure we were still on for that, but yes, ok."

He put an arm around her slowly stroking her back, "We have some serious making up to do," he winked, giving her a quick kiss.

"I was looking forward to this weekend before," she purred, moving up close to him, "but now I'm really, really looking forward to it."

He kissed her again before she got in her car. He leaned inside the open door, "I want you to know something, Nikki."

"What?" she whispered.

"I'll try. I'll try hard to work on all those things that can make being with me..." he shrugged, "difficult."

He'd yet to return the 'I love you' that she had given him but she didn't care. She didn't want it to be said as a cliché' or a simple response because he felt like he had to. She wanted it to come from his heart when he was ready. The fact that he wanted to please her was more than satisfying for her.

"I think we get along so well because we don't have to try," she said to him. "I like you just the way you are, Steve."

And there it was he thought happily; the acceptance that he had always wanted from a woman, to be exactly who he was and still be loved by her.

"I think you're right," he admitted, "because I love you just the way you are too, Nikki." He leaned in and kissed her and then closed the door, leaving her with a smile as she watched him walk to his car.

Jimmy Ketchum slouched down in the driver's seat of his truck that was parked down the row from Nikki's car and watched Steve get in a black Camaro from his side mirror. He sat up after he drove past him, starting the engine as Nikki went past him next.

"Him!" he growled, gripping the steering wheel. "She's with him?! That son of a bitch who thinks he's so fucking superior!" His anger ignited as he sat in his car staring out the windshield recalling the day that Nikki had been released from jail and his last encounter with Steve. He slammed his hand against the wheel over and over reliving the humiliation and fear intimidation that he had experienced at the hand of Steve McGarrett.

"I was good to that little whore," he spat, "and she treats me like I'm trash! Won't even have a drink with me! Like I'm some kind of animal or something. That bitch," he grumbled. "She still owes me."


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen**

"So," Danny asked as he and Steve sat in the Camaro that was parked outside Jason Mahmood's apartment complex, waiting his arrival home from work, per Chin and Kono's confirmation that he had just left Club 808.

"So, what?" Steve asked, but didn't look over in his direction, keeping his eyes focused on the parking lot entrance.

"Tell me what happened when you found her?"

"I apologized and all is well."

"You apologized?" Danny huffed. "Tell me the truth. You begged. You got down in the sand on your knees and pleaded your case for her forgiveness."

Steve glanced over at him. "I know that's how you ask for forgiveness Danny, but not everyone else is as pathetic as you are."

"Ha, ha," he grumbled. "Fine, I don't want to know, but you did make up with her, right?"

"Yep. She's at a rental house right now waiting for me, and as soon as this douchebag shows up and we arrest him, I'm driving back over to the North Shore and join her."

"Wow!" Danny expressed surprise over that. "A weekend getaway. You do realize on those types of trips there is no actual getaway? You are stuck with her the whole weekend."

Steve looked over at him again, narrowing his eyes; "You know your insight into relationships astounds me sometimes, Daniel."

"Thank you," Danny grinned.

"I didn't mean it as a compliment." Steve chuckled, focusing back on the parking lot entrance.

"Well you better listen up because this girl obviously loves you and if you want this relationship to go anywhere then you better be on your toes."

"Why?" Steve abruptly asked, turning his body so he could see him better. "Why does it have to be that way? She knows me. I haven't pretended to be anything or anybody that I'm not and she still loves me. I think I got it pretty good. Maybe that's why YOU don't have anyone right now because you are always on the defense." He shifted back to normal in his seat. "I think you should start listening to me."

"Oh right, that's brilliant!" Danny laid his head back and laughed, "Because you are so up on relationships," he roared. "You can start your own radio talk show. Dr. Steve and the two women he's dated."

Steve couldn't help but chuckle over that. "I've had more than two relationships."

"High school doesn't count," Danny argued.

"Fine!" Steve threw his hands up, "If it will shut you up, please Danny in your wisdom of relationship advice, please tell me what I need to do to make this perfect relationship that I'm in, work better!"

"Ok, the one piece of advice that I can give you above all others is this…IF, she seems like she has something to say, then she does."

It was Steve's turn to laugh, "What does that even mean? That's the worst piece of advice I'm ever heard."

Danny shrugged, "Trust me on this. You'll see the signs when she's staring back at you and you can just see the wheels turning but no words are coming out. That is when the danger starts."

"Oh my god," Steve moaned. "You know what? You always tell me I need professional help, but seriously I think you might have just proved it's the other way around. You need help. I am not going to negatively read into something just because she has a funny look on her face, when it could just very well be indigestion," he chuckled shaking his head at his partner. "If Nikki has something to say then I would hope that she has the insight to know that she can tell me anything and it would be ok."

"Oh…" Danny nodded, "like getting a phone call from an old boss. You handled that really well."

Steve slowly turned his head, glaring over at him, "Shut up! Ok, just shut…up!"

Danny smiled proudly, knowing he'd accomplished what he had set out to do, annoy the hell out of Steve while confined in the small car. It was just too much fun to avoid, especially with the subject of women knowing he'd have the upper hand for sure. In retrospect, he was happy for him. He and Nikki had a history and even more than that Nikki knew his father and respected him, which Danny knew for a fact put her on a pedestal above all others just for that. He felt Steve would make all the right decisions because he respected her so much.

He waited until the tension subsided before asking his next question.

"So…do you love her?"

"I'm not talking to you anymore," Steve jokingly replied.

"C'mon," Danny chuckled, "I'm sorry ok? I think you and Nikki will be great together." He still got nothing so turned it up a notch. "Of course when you throw her in jail for lying about some parking tickets she might want a divorce."

Steve laughed and playfully lunged at him in the small confines of the car, getting him in a headlock. They were both laughing when he glanced out the windshield and saw the familiar face pull in. He let go of Danny immediately.

"He's here. Let's go get him."

Jason Mahmood got out of his old Toyota pick up and angrily slammed the door close. "Piece of shit truck," he mumbled, still fired up from his last encounter with Jimmy. He'd yet to be paid for the smash and grab jobs, constantly being told to be patient, that they didn't want to draw attention to themselves, but he was getting sick and tired of risking his neck and seeing none of the profits. He'd fronted him a couple hundred here and there but that was it! He sniffed loudly and blew out the remains past his lips on the concrete sidewalk, snarling his lip afterward swearing to himself that he wasn't doing the next job until he saw some of the profits. '_Fuck, Jimmy' _he thought bitterly.

"Jason Mahmood?" Steve called out as he and Danny approached him from behind, both with their hands on their guns that were still holstered, preparing for the worse.

Jason turned and looked at the two men. He narrowed his eyes, not recognizing their faces and then panic struck him when he saw the badges on their hips.

"Shit!" Danny groaned as he watched Jason take off running. "Why do they run? Punk asshole." But he was talking to himself while Steve was already four long strides ahead of him and quickly gaining on Jason's slow moving, overweight body that was run down by years of drinking, smoking and drug use.

Steve reached out and shoved him on the back with both hands, knowing he'd fall and fall hard, which he did.

Danny came running up behind him and took over from there as Steve pulled his gun.

"Don't move," Steve ordered, pointing his weapon at him.

Danny rolled him over from his side and grabbed his right hand pulling it behind his back and cuffing it. "Why did you run? Feeling guilty about something?"

"I didn't do anything?!" Jason shouted and then yelped as Danny put the other cuff on him.

"Yes you did," Steve countered, reaching down and gripping his left arm as Danny held the right, lifting him off the ground. "You're under arrest for robbery."

"I didn't rob anything!" Jason protested as they led him back toward an awaiting patrol car that had been nearby waiting for their signal to approach.

"Then why did you run?" Danny chuckled.

Jason turned his head looking at him, "Because I hate cops!"

"Well the feelings are mutual," Steve replied, "because we hate criminals." He pushed down on his head as he put him in the backseat of the car.

…..

"Who are your partners, Jason?" Steve asked as he stood, arms crossed and stared down at him in the chair positioned in the middle of the interrogation room. Both his hands cuffed to the back of the chair.

"Partners for what?" he asked nervously, looking back and forth between the two men. "I don't know what you're talking about!"

Steve and Danny looked at each other and laughed.

"You can't pretend that you haven't been caught," Steve continued. "I'm mean…we got you red handed."

"Or red armed if you want to get technical," Danny chimed in. "You cut your arm, not your hand."

"That's true, Danny. Thank you for pointing that out." Steve walked up to Jason and poked his finger in the area where the cut from the broken glass was under his shirtsleeve.

"Ouch!" he squirmed and tried to move his handcuffed right arm away from anymore protruding.

"Where did you get that wound?" Danny asked him.

"None of your fucking business!" Jason spat back.

Steve walked over and picked up the computer tablet that was sitting on the floor by the door. On his way back to Jason he pulled up the video from the latest smash and grab robbery, forwarding it to the exact spot he wanted. He turned it around and held it up for Jason to see.

"Look familiar?"

Jason squinted his eyes and swallowed hard, ignoring what he was watching and looked up at Steve. "So! Are you trying to say that was me?"

"It is you," Danny replied.

"No it's not."

"Well I think a jury will believe otherwise when we show them the DNA that we got from the glass that you cut your arm on."

Steve replayed the video again and paused it right at that frame, showing him the screen. "So like I said, you can't pretend that you're not caught." He pulled the tablet back and smiled down at Jason. "Would you like to cooperate now and tell us who the other three people were or do you want to take the fall all on your own while they get to enjoy their freedom and spend all that money that you are going to prison for? Because you are going to prison, that's a done deal."

Jason swallowed hard again and looked away from them as his heart began to beat rapidly. "I want my phone call," was all he said.

Steve looked over at Danny. "He's right. It's our public duty to let him have one phone call. Let's get him a phone."

Ten minutes later Jason was un-cuffed and handed a cordless phone while Steve and Danny stepped out of the room.

Thirty seconds later Jimmy answered his cell phone.

"Jimmy!" Jason said out of breath from the trouble he was in. "You gotta help me!"

"What's the problem," Jimmy replied irritably, just getting back from the North Shore after following Nikki around for about an hour until she entered a small house off of Sunset Beach.

"I got arrested!"

That got his attention. "What?! Where are you?!"

"I'm at the police station! You gotta help me out. They have video of the robbery and…"

"Shut up!" Jimmy blasted him. "You stupid idiot! Why would you call me?"

"Because you have the money to…"

"Shut up!" Jimmy yelled again. "Keep your mouth shut!"

"But the cop said…"

"What cop? Who arrested you?"

"Five-0. Two cops from Five-0 did. They said that if I don't talk then I'm going…"  
"Goddamnit Jason! Don't say another fucking word to anyone about anything! You got me?"

"Yes but what am…" He stopped midsentence hearing the call being disconnected by Jimmy. "Shit!"

Steve and Danny both walked back in the room after watching him through the window of the door.

"Ok," Steve began, "now that we've got that out of the way. How about you start giving us the names of your partners."

Jason stared up at him and just shook his head. "I'm not saying another word."

"Ok, fine by me." He looked at his watch. "Well it's five-thirty on a Friday night so you won't be able to get in front of a judge until Monday, and unless you called your high profile lawyer, which I doubt you did, then you won't see a public defender until Monday either. So enjoy your all expense paid weekend at the lovely HPD lock up."

"Let's get you to a cell so I can start my weekend," Danny said as he went behind him and cuffed his hands again.

…

"What are we going to do with him," Danny asked as they both walked back to their offices after getting Jason processed and locked up.

"Nothing," Steve replied. "Let him sit there over the weekend and think about prison."

"What about Jimmy? You know he's involved now."

"I do, but he also knows that we know he's involved, so I'm pretty sure he's shitting bricks right now and laying low."

"Do want to pick him up?"

"And ruin my weekend with Nikki? No way! She's sitting in a two hundred and fifty dollar a night house on Sunset right now waiting for me. Jimmy's not going anywhere and if he tries then we'll arrest him. He's on the no-fly list with Jason so if he tries to take a flight out of Dodge we'll know about it. Besides, I'm pretty sure that Jason will give him and the others up on Monday when we talk again. Did you see the look on his face when he went in that cell?"

They both laughed.

"I thought he was going to pass out his face was so white."

Steve laughed, "Wait until he has to use the can in front of all those other guys. Did you see that one guy with the weird eye looking at him?"

They both laughed again.

"Poor Jason's not going to get any sleep tonight."

They both were laughing even harder as they came through the doors to their offices.

"What's so funny?" Kono asked as she appeared at her office doorway with a grin.

"Nothing," Steve replied. "You had to have been there and seen it. What are you still doing here?" he asked her.

"What do you mean? We're not going to go arrest that Jimmy dude?"

"Nope," Danny smiled, "Steve's got a date for the weekend which means…"

"When the boss is away…" she added in an eager tone.

"Have a great weekend, Kono," Steve finished. "If anything comes up we'll call you, but I don't anticipate anything happening."

"Sweet!" she replied happily, going back to her desk and grabbing her keys. "Chin is gassing up his car. I'll text him. Have fun on your date." She went past them and out the glass doors in a flash.

Steve grunted as he glanced over at Danny, "You think she was eager to get out of here?"

"Not as eager as me." Danny slapped him on the arm and turned on his heels, "See you Monday. Have fun."

Steve watched him go through the same doors that Kono just had, leaving him alone.

"Jesus," he mumbled, "maybe I work them too much." He thought about that statement for all of about two seconds and then shook his head, "Nah!"

….

Steve opened the door of the rental house and set down his and Nikki's bag that he'd picked up from her apartment. He was about to call out for her, but saw her long, tanned legs as she sat on one of lounge chairs on the lanai. The sun was just minutes away from making its departure, and the sky was a beautiful pink. He admired it as he came out and around the chair seeing her dozing with a book resting on her chest.

He sat down on the edge of the other lounge next to her and watched her for a minute, soaking in her beauty as the soft colors from the sunset made her flawless completion even more perfect.

He couldn't contain himself any longer and leaned over giving her a kiss.

Her eyes came open and she smiled at him as he took the book and set it on his lounger and then moved over to join her on hers. She happily scooted over, making room for him.

"All's well for a computer and phone free weekend?" she asked him.

He reached behind the chair and released the latch that was holding it up in a sitting position.

Nikki shrieked as it instantly laid out flat and then laughed as he rolled over on top of her, bracing himself up on his elbows that were positioned on either side of her head.

"No distractions," he promised and then kissed her.

She moved her hands inside of his t-shirt and up his back, caressing him as she kissed him back.

It was going to be a fabulous weekend she thought happily.

"We have dinner reservations in an hour and a half," he whispered in her ear.

"Why don't we go check out the bed first and maybe see if we can work up an appetite," Nikki replied, nibbling on his neck, hoping to entice him.

Steve pushed himself up off the lounger and bent over, scooping her up in his arms.

"Wow!" Nikki giggled, "You really want to check out that bed."

"It was an hour drive here. I've been mentally in bed with you since I left Waikiki." He kissed her as he made his way to the bedroom, "Now I want the real thing."

He tossed her on top of the billowy white comforter and kicked his tennis shoes off. He was about to crawl up to her when she put her hands up.

"Wait." she said, scooting back on the bed against the pillows. "I want to watch you get undressed."

"What?!" he laughed.

She used her finger to motion for him to undress. "C'mon, shirt first."

"Ok," he agreed, appeasing her one request, pulling his shirt over his head. He let it fall on the floor and then tried once again to join her when she put her foot up, blocking his path.

"Hey, you aren't undressed yet. Let's get those shorts off."

"Nikki," he halfheartedly laughed, "I'm not going to strip for you."

"Why not?" she sat up and pulled her knees up to her chest. "I love looking at you. You look great fully dressed. Hell, you look gorgeous." She rested her chin on her propped up knees, "but naked, you are without a doubt the most amazing man. I don't even think you know how attractive you really are." She smiled sweetly at him. "I don't want you to strip for me, Steve. I just want to watch the man I'm in love with get undressed before he makes love to me. That's all. You don't have to be shy about it. I love the way you look."

He stared at her as he let her words soak in, realizing she didn't mean it in a demeaning sexual way. She just liked looking at him. He really couldn't deny that it was probably the best and most unusual compliment he'd ever received, flattered by her honesty. The idea that she thought of him that way was sexy as hell too.

She held his gaze as he slowly unbuttoned his shorts and then unzipped them, sliding them off his hips and then stepped out of them, leaving him in nothing but his black boxer briefs.

He felt himself getting hard just watching her watch him.

She lay back on the pillows as he slid the boxers off, all the while not once, not even for a split second did he take his eyes off of hers.

She reached her hand out to him, "Come here."

He crawled up between her legs and lay face to face with her, looking back at her as she smiled adoringly at him.

Neither said a word but both felt it. The respect had always been there. The mutual attraction as well, but now they felt a bond that was slowly joining them together that could and would sustain them through the most challenging times ahead.

…..

Nikki whimpered softly as he laid his sweaty forehead on her shoulder, letting the explosive moment settle inside of him before he moved.

She ran her hand over his damp hair and kissed his cheek, tasting a hint of salt from his sweat, licking her lips, enjoying the sweet taste of him.

"We gotta get out of town more often," Nikki whispered and felt his body begin to shake as he chuckled over that.

He searched out her lips and thanked her properly for allowing him to bask in the delightful pleasure of her body. She was an amazing lover, feeding off of his desire for her. It was as if she were in tune with his thoughts and his needs, fulfilling them all and even some he hadn't considered. Sex was great, but sex with Nikki was in a whole new realm that he'd never experienced before.

He teetered on that line between losing himself in all that she had to offer and the part of him that was holding back, afraid to make that jump, needing a push that would cause him to lose his balance and step across that line into the light.

…

"This place is exquisite," Nikki said of the Turtle Bay restaurant that overlooked the beach with the same name. They dined out in the open aired restaurant with dimed lightening so nothing would take away from the spectacular moonlit view of the ocean.

"It is pretty here," he agreed.

He reached over and put his hand on her leg under the table, "I'm sorry, I know I'm about to piss off some Akua's, but I don't think anything is as beautiful as you are tonight Nikki. You look amazing."

She blushed slightly and bent her head, putting her hand over top of his that rested on her knee. "Thank you, and thank you for being here with me. I'm having such a good time."

"Me too."

She felt it rise up in her and knew keeping it in at that moment would have just been wrong.

"I love you," she said to him in the most honest and sincere voice he'd ever heard.

It was that second that he lost his balance and stepped across the line and knew he'd never regret it.

"Thank you, Nikki for saying that. I feel it from you, and I've never had that before, until I met you." He held her gaze and her hand under the table, "I love you too."

He was surprised at how easy it was to say to her. There would be no negative repercussions that would affect their relationship because he had said it, he knew that and for the first time in as long as he could remember he felt safe. It was an odd sensation but it was real, as real as she was looking back at him with the most adoring eyes he'd ever seen. He did love her and felt certain that he always would.

"I want an open and honest relationship with you," she said. "I'll never lie to you again."

"I know that. I understand why you did what you did, Nikki. It was my fault for jumping to conclusions. I knew you could never do anything like that and I allowed myself to fall into that trap of accusing you before I let you explain yourself. I won't let that happen again either. I trust you."

"Thank you." She leaned in closer to him, "You know what?"

"What?"

"I think we're going to be great together. I really do."

"You know," he said quietly almost shyly, "I have to confess that I almost gave up on something like this. When you're young you're so sure its going to happen that its really not in your plans or thoughts, but then after I joined the Navy and time went on I began to realize that there was a chance that it would never happen. In some aspects I had given up." he smiled over at her. "And then there you stood in the middle of all that broken glass."

"And in walked my night in shinning armor."

He bent his head and chuckled over that.

"Its true," she argued adamantly.

"That's far from the truth," Steve grinned, blushing slightly never being able to take a compliment very well, especially from women.

"I think it's who you want to be," Nikki simply explained. "You want to be the protector, the guardian, and the one who people stand behind while you put up your fists. Stuart was like that. It has nothing to do with arrogance or an ego or even proving that you can; it just simply has to do with who you are. I think I love that about you more than anything else."

He'd never thought of himself in that way before, and it wasn't even her compliment or the words she used to describe him that made him feel the way he did, it was simply that she did indeed feel protected with him. She was right, because he just learned something new about himself, of all his traits he hoped that she would accept and embrace, for her to feel safe with him was the most important. He felt like more of a man at that second than he had at anytime in his life.

"I would keep you safe, Nikki. I will, above all else."

She saw it plain as could be in his eyes when he said it. "I know you will. Thank you for that." She cupped the back of his neck and pulled him in for a kiss, surprising him once again.

He wanted her so badly at that moment that taking her right there in the middle of the restaurant didn't even seem half as crazy as it sounded. But what shocked him more than anything, was that he didn't want her for the erotic reasons that he always had before, he simply wanted that closeness with her that could only come from making love with her. He couldn't help but wonder what else he was going to learn about himself before the weekend was over.

…

Nikki lifted her head out of the water and saw Steve floating a few feet away, face down as they snorkeled in Shark's Cove just a few miles from the rental house.

He stood up and lifted his mask onto his head, "Are you tired?" he asked her. "You want to head in?"

"I'm thirsty," she replied. "I'm going to go up and get a drink and relax. You stay and snorkel some more."

"Ok, I'm going to head over that way," he pointed toward a deeper area. "I'll just be a little while longer."

She made her way over to him in the waist high water, "Take your time and enjoy yourself. I'm not going anywhere." With that said she kissed him and turned towards the shore.

He watched her make her way to the beach enjoying the view, even more so from behind before he replaced his mask and lay back down in the water, kicking his feet, headed in the direction he had pointed out.

Nikki came out and sat down on their blanket and reached inside the cooler for her water bottle, taking a long drink. She watched him swim to the other side and smiled, feeling relaxed and knowing he was too. It was a perfect day.

She put her sunglasses on and lay back on the towel and closed her eyes, picturing him as a smile spread across her face. She felt her body heat up, but not from the direct sunlight that shined down on her, but from her thoughts of him. She was in love. Head over heals in love. He felt the same. She'd never been happier in her whole life.

Steve treaded water looking over in the direction of where Nikki was and caught a glimpse of her laying in the sun. He thought he wanted to snorkel some more but as he made his way further away from her, he began to miss her.

"You're pathetic," he said out loud.

The area wasn't very crowded that day and no one but his own ears heard his words.

"You don't have a fighting chance against her." He smiled then as she sat up, shielding her eyes with her hand, looking over in his direction. "Why would you want too," he admitted and began to swim back to her.

He barely recognizes himself in this new life that had sprung up out of nowhere, but he wasn't about to question it or try to decipher it either like he normally would have. He just wanted to enjoy it for now. He was the happiest he'd ever been in his life. Why mess with perfection, he thought.

Nikki stood up and saw him making his way back to her. She waited until his face came out of the water and waved at him, pointing toward the restrooms.

Steve waved back acknowledging her. Not suspecting the danger that lurked close by. How could he? His mind was elsewhere. It was a perfect day. What could possibly go wrong?


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

Steve sat on the blanket that he and Nikki had laid out on the small beach on Shark's Cove.

He glanced over his shoulder for a third time looking for her to come down the pathway from the parking lot where the restrooms were located right above him. But still she didn't appear.

It had been close to fifteen minutes since she'd left to make the one-minute walk up, hoping she was feeling all right, but he couldn't recall her saying as much while they were out snorkeling nor did she seem it by any means. She'd mentioned being thirsty which wasn't unusual; they'd been out in the water for over an hour.

He looked again and decided then to investigate just too make sure she was ok.

He slid into his slippers and began the short trek up, keeping an eye on the women's restroom door entrance that was in view.

The parking lot wasn't too crowded and he could see his truck from where he stood not seeing her in it either.

He waited by the restrooms when a woman came out with a little girl attached to her hand.

"Excuse me," he said to her. "Do you know if there is a blond woman in there? She came up a little bit ago and hasn't come out and I want to make sure she's ok."

"I didn't see anyone else in there," she replied. "Hold on and let me check again."

"Her name is Nikki," Steve called out as she and the little girl went back inside.

She reappeared only seconds later. "Nope. It's empty."

His expression became bewildered as he looked around at his surroundings, "Ok, thanks."

He went to the truck first, wondering if maybe she was lying down, but when he tried the door it was locked. He cupped his hands up against the tinted glass and looked in both the front and back seat but it was empty. He checked the bed of it as well, but still nothing.

"Nikki!" he yelled out, beginning to get a query feeling in the pit of his stomach. "Nikki!" he yelled again, making his way back toward the bathrooms.

He went down the path and back to their blanket. Her snorkel gear was still there as well as her beach bag. He sorted through it finding her phone and wallet still there.

He stood up and scanned the water not seeing the dark blue and white polka dotted swimsuit amongst the other people.

"Shit," he mumbled, "where are you?"

He made his way back up the path and began searching out the nearby park that had picnic tables set up: a couple of them occupied by locals and one with the family of the woman who had searched the restroom for him.

He approached one of the tables, speaking to an older Hawaiian man that was dressed in blue overalls with his name embroidered on the right breast.

"Excuse me, I was wondering if you've seen a blond woman, long hair with a blue and white polka dotted swimsuit? She's about five six, maybe a hundred and fifteen pounds?"

He looked up at him from his box lunch, "No, I'm sorry. I just got here."

Steve turned his head in both directions as that dreaded feeling began to overtake him. "Ok thanks." He moved on not paying attention to the other table of people who was the woman from earlier.

"Nikki!" he yelled out again, making his way to the other side of the park that led to another entrance to the beach.

"Excuse me," a woman's voice behind him called out.

He turned around and was met by a middle-aged woman who had tourist written all over her. Complete with a straw hat on her head and an oversized Hawaiian t-shirt and one of the worst sunburns he'd had ever seen. "Yes."

"I heard you asking that gentleman over there if he'd seen a young blond girl in a polka dotted swimsuit."

"Yes, did you see Nikki?" he asked, finally getting a feeling of relief.

"Well…." She paused with a confused expression as she scratched her cheek. "I'm not sure. I think so." She pointed toward the restrooms. "There was a man carrying a woman across the parking lot. I heard him say that she'd had too much sun and had passed out. She had long blond hair and was wearing a blue and white polka dotted swimsuit. He put her in his truck. I think it was red."

Steve felt his head begin to swim over the unsettling information that was just passed on to him. "Where? Where did you see this?!"

He followed her as they went back toward the parking lot, feeling his stomach begin to turn as the fear set in.

"He came out of the bathroom holding her in his arms and was parked right over there." She pointed to an open spot.

He ran over in that direction but saw nothing out of the ordinary and no red truck in sight. "What did he look like? Did you get a look at him or the license plate?"

She shrugged; becoming alarmed over his obvious concern. "I don't know. I…I"

"Think!" he yelled, seeing her cringe. He quickly calmed his temper, knowing she might be the last link to Nikki. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Ok." He put a hand on his chest. "I'm a police officer, that woman was my girlfriend and she might have just been abducted. Please, just try and tell me what you saw."

His voice was on the verge of panic; she recognized that, sensing his fear. "I was walking across the parking lot after coming from my car over there." She pointed at a white Ford Explorer. "He was coming toward me, carrying her." she squinted her eyes as if recalling the image. "Now that I think about it he was moving rather quickly and had on a green hat and bent his head slightly as if trying to hide his face. As he came by he gave an explanation but I didn't ask for one. He said she had too much sun and had passed out. But," she moved her hands over her sunburned face and neck, "this is too much sun. That young woman had a deep tan, she looked liked she understood the sun."

He put his over his stomach to try and calm the hysteria that was growing from the inside out. "Did you get a look at him?"

"Kind of," she replied. "He looked a little older than you with very tanned skinned. He also was wearing jeans, which I thought odd for the beach."

"His truck," Steve said almost breathless now. "Can you tell me what kind it was?"

"I think it was a Ford F-150, it was red with one of those carrier bars thing in the bed of it." Her expression became horrified. "Oh my god, I'm such a fool. I should have said something or got help from someone." She felt tears sting her eyes. "I'm so sorry. You don't think…" she paused not wanting to say it, but saw all over him that he was thinking the same thing.

"Stay here, please don't go anywhere. I'm going to call for help."

He ran back down the path to where their blanket was and found his phone where he'd left it under his baseball hat. His fingers trembled slightly as he dialed 911.

….

Steve came off the curb when he saw the black Camaro pull into Shark's Cove parking lot, rushing over to meet Danny as he took the first open spot next to a police car and got out.

As he approached him, Danny was startled by the expression that covered his partner's face, never seeing him look so distraught. In that split second Steve went from his partner to his best friend, knowing he needed that side of him more than the professional.

"Danny," Steve said as he got within earshot, his voice clearly on the verge of panic. "She's gone! There's a witness over there." He pointed to a woman who was sitting with her family, being questioned by the local police.

Danny put his hands up as he went toward him, "Ok, hey, hey, just settle down. Take a breath." He guided him back over to his car and leaned him against the side. "Tell me what happened."

Steve closed his eyes and felt the hysteria he'd been fighting slowly calm just having Danny there. He took a breath and when he opened his eyes back up, he transformed to work mode, knowing it was what Nikki needed him to be to find her.

He began from the beginning, telling him about how he had been swimming toward her and seeing her point toward the bathrooms and ended it with the woman's eyewitness account of someone carrying her to their red truck that had a bed rack in it. "From what she described," Steve explained, "it sounds like it was a surfboard rack. So he's probably a surfer."

Danny shrugged, "Ok, so that narrows it down to half the state and would make all of the North Shore's residences suspects. Did she get a look at the license plate?"

Steve shook his head dismally, "No, but she got a look at him."

"Then we need to get her and Thomas together while her mind is still fresh."

Steve agreed, knowing Thomas was the best HPD sketch artist there was. "I already called him. He's on his way."

"Ok, that's good." He put a hand on his shoulder, "We've got some good leads." He needed to ask a question but was a little weary over how he should approach it. "Um. I need to ask you something and I don't want you to get pissed, but it's a question I think you would ask me as well if I were in this…shitty situation."

"What?" Steve narrowed his eyes, not having the frame of mind to even try and decipher Danny's thoughts at the moment.

"Did you two…" he took a deep breath and let it out, "did you have a fight, or any kind of disagreement that would make her want to leave?" He quickly put his hands up in defense, seeing Steve's expression quickly change and become defensive. "I know we have an eyewitness and she claims Nikki was carried away as if unconscious, but I still need to ask, just to rule it out."

Steve opened his mouth to challenge that, but then shut it, knowing Danny was right. It was a legitimate question, and yes, he would have asked the same of him if the tables were turned.

"No," he replied calmly. "On the contrary, everything was going great. Perfect in fact." He leaned back against the car again, running his hands over his head. "I'm scared Danny. I want to jump in my truck and start beating down doors until I find her," he looked over at him helplessly, "but I don't know where to start."

"We'll find her," he assured him, squeezing his shoulder.

"The thought of someone putting their hands on her, or…" he gritted his teeth and his next words came out in a low growl, "When we do find her, if they laid a on her, I'll tear his fucking throat out!"

….

Nikki opened her eyes to darkness, feeling her head pounding from the tire iron that had knocked her out. She tried to reach up with her hand to touch the painful spot not recalling how she had got it when she felt a wave of panic take place of the throbbing, realizing that her hands were bound together behind her back.

She squirmed in the confinements of the darkness and felt a whole new set of terror overcome her as she tried to sit up but hit her head on something hard and then kicked her legs hitting the base of the box, realizing she was trapped.

"Steve!" she screamed, wiggling her body as panic began to overtake her.

"Help me! Steve!" her voice quivered with fear. "Help!"

"Shut up!"

She heard the strange voice yell out and then the box jolt from a kick to it coming from the outside.

She began to shiver from fear. "Who are you? What do you want with me?"

Jimmy walked away, hearing the distress in her voice. He slammed the door closed to his grandfather's garage. "Shit! Shit! What did you do? Shit!" He paced back and forth in the yard between the main house and the unattached garage. "You're in this now," he said as a bead of sweat dripped down his face. "Ok, just relax. Get your head together."

He couldn't recall the exact moment that he had decided to take her, but the fear of the police closing in on him from Jason being arrested had set off a panic in him that was beyond any high that he injected or snorted could remedy.

They suspected him he just knew it. He didn't need them to show up at his doorstep or the Club to know that. Jason had given him away by calling him first instead of calling a lawyer like they had all talked about if ever arrested. '_Keep your mouth shut and lawyer up'_, but Jason was too stupid to remember those details.

He had initially been following Steve not Nikki, wanting to get a jump ahead of him incase he were being investigated, figuring if he followed the head honcho and he went anywhere near his apartment or the Club 808 then those would be huge red flags. It surprised him but also intrigued him that after leaving the police station Steve drove to Nikki's apartment and then to the North Shore.

He had parked outside the rental house that Nikki had gone to earlier that day, as Jimmy watched him go inside, realizing they were just hooking up at that point. He didn't drive away though, not knowing exactly why, maybe because he felt safe there. He could keep an eye on Steve and no one in a million years would suspect him of tailing the head of Five-0. So his location at the moment was secure.

His head throbbed as he paced back and forth in his grandfather's yard, hearing her scream out once again.

"Shut up!" he yelled, picturing her past the barn wall and inside the wooden pine box he had locked her in.

The house was off the main road located in the middle of the island where homes had larger property borders. His grandfather's house had been in the family for two generations so the lot was even more secluded than most. No one had lived there for six months though since the elderly man was moved to a home to be cared for once the land and house became too much for him to manage. An estate lawyer was now in charge of it, but Jimmy also knew that it was currently on hold from being sold since there were two of his Aunts on the mainland that were squabbling over who should get what. It was the perfect place to hide out and even more perfect if you kidnapped someone.

Jimmy nervously recalled now the exact moment that had triggered his impulsive move to take her.

He sat in his truck looking out over the Pacific as Steve and Nikki snorkeled below in Shark's Cove. If he were arrested for the robberies he thought fearfully, he'd spend the rest of his life in jail, or a good portion of it. The dread of being incarcerated with murders terrified him beyond words. He reached over in the glove compartment of his truck and pulled out a small baggy half filled with coke and dipped the tip of his car key into it, putting it up to nose and snorting it in, doing the same to his left nostril and then repeating it one more time to each side.

He wiped his nose off and instantly felt the rush of the drug and tasted it as well as it slid down his throat. The high felt good but the problem was still there.

"Fuck!" he growled. "I need an edge. I need an edge that will get me out of this fucking mess. _Cash!"_ he thought anxiously, _'I need cash and a way off this island.'_

He thought about just getting on a plane and heading south to some small island nation and living out his years on a beach somewhere. "Fuck Hawaii." But that idea was snuffed out realizing he'd never be able to get on a plane with all that jewelry. He'd been hanging on to the majority of the stolen merchandise just waiting until things settled down and then he could get rid of them for thousands. The club was drowning him financially so he really had no liquid cash except for what was in the safe and registers from day to day. His drug habit wasn't helping the matter either.

He zipped up the bag of coke and tossed it back into the glove box, contemplating another idea when he looked up and saw Nikki coming up the path.

"Bitch," he thought bitterly, hating her even more now that she was sleeping with him.

An idea came to him then that he neither thought out a plan for nor did he contemplate the outcome, but the next thing he knew, in his state of too much drug hindrance, he was walking towards the women's restrooms with a tire iron in his hand.

She was his ticket off this island. She was his edge.

"Help me!" Nikki screamed out again and again. She heard nothing from outside the box, hoping whomever it was that had taken her had left and that someone would hear her pleas and get her out.

Where was Steve, she thought helplessly, assured that he must know by now that she was missing? He'd be looking for her, but where was she?

"Steve!" she screamed again and then coughed from the dryness in her throat. The confined space was dusty and well sealed. She couldn't make out even a spec of light.

She kicked her legs again, hoping to maybe bust through the bottom of it, using as much strength as she could to kick when she heard something outside again and froze.

Jimmy undid the lock on the box and threw the lid open.

Nikki squinted her eyes, expecting a bright light but the confines of the garage were dimly lit and she recognized her assailant immediately, shocked over it.

"Jimmy?! What are you doing? Why? Why? Let me go!"

"Shut up!" He grabbed her arm and pulled up on her bicep. "This will keep you quiet. I'm sure it's been a while since you've had a hit, so enjoy the memories."

Nikki tried to pull her arm away to no avail. "No! Please, Jimmy!" she begged. "I'll be quiet! Please don't do it!"

He injected the needle into her arm and then let her go, slamming the lid closed and locking it again.

Nikki closed her eyes and began to tremble, trying with all her might to fight off the drug that was quickly taking over her body. The rush was familiar but not at all as pleasurable as it used to be.

"No," she whispered. "I won't succumb to this. I won't let it take me."

She felt her fingertips becoming numb and her head woozy, not able to fight the drug that had once ruled her life, eventually she did succumb to the chemical as her eyes rolled back and she lay still feeling the familiar high that had almost ruined her once before.

"No," she whispered. "Don't. Steve." Her thoughts drifted in and out as she tried to picture him but she finally surrendered to the dreamlike state as her body remembered the pleasurable sensation that had been restricted for over five years.

He had no clue what he was going to do with her. Now that his high was wearing down the panic was really setting in. He knew commercial flying wouldn't be an option, but maybe if he could get enough money out of the safe and from the registers at the club he could hire a pilot out of Dillingham. No one knew yet that he had Nikki, maybe, he thought, maybe he'd take her with him, but that crazy idea was quickly diminished. The next question was, what would he do with her? Regretting even more his impulsive plan to take her in the first place. If he were caught then the kidnapping would add an extra twenty-five years to his sentence.

If they found her?

'_If they never found her'_, he thought uneasily, '_then they couldn't prove he had taken her at all.'_

…..

Steve stood behind Kathy Braxton, the eyewitness as she answered questions from Thomas, the police sketch artist. He drew out the details of her answers on a white, eight by ten pad.

Steve stared at the blank piece of paper that began to take shape of a person that was responsible for taking Nikki away from him.

The artist began with the baseball hat that she described as old and a dirty green, not knowing what the decal on the front was, but as she described it all three of the men simultaneously recognized her description as the University of Hawaii logo.

He then sketched out the shape of the face as she closed her eyes and described for him the details of it from memory, the man's nose, his eyes the shape of his lips.

"His skin was really tanned," Kathy described. "I mean it was kind of weathered like he'd lived here his whole life, but not in a good way, you know?"

"Yes," Thomas replied, using that information to restructure the facial features. "Did he have any noticeable scars or tattoos?" he asked.

She shook her head, "Not that I remember."

Steve came around the back of Thomas and narrowed his eyes as he watched the picture take shape into human form. There was something familiar about the face but he couldn't quite match it to anyone he knew.

"Oh wait!" her eyes flew open. "I just remembered something! His truck. It had a sticker on the back. It was yellow with the numbers 808. Isn't that the Hawaiian area code?"

She looked up at Steve who met Danny's eyes at that precise moment, both men putting it together at the same time. He then looked back down at the sketch and recognized the drawn face that had looked familiar to him.

"Jimmy Ketchum," he said through gritted teeth.

Danny ran after him as Steve darted for the Camaro.

"Give me the keys!" he demanded, reaching his hand out to Danny.

"Where are you going?"

"Club 808," Steve said as if that was the stupidest question ever asked.

"Hold on," Danny said with his hands up. "We're on the north shore, remember? Let's get a hold of Kono and Chin and put out an APB on him."

"Fine," Steve huffed, "you go ahead and make that call, but in the meantime," he went past him toward his own truck. "I'm going to 808 and if I have to burn that fucking place to the ground, someone's going to tell me where he is!"

Danny didn't bother trying to stop him, knowing it would be useless, but also knowing that if it were he that were in trouble, not only would he want Steve searching for him, but he'd want the Steve that just roared out of the parking lot who knew how to get answers and get them quick.

….

Jimmy came in through the back entrance of the club and was immediately met by a cook from the kitchen.

"Hey Jimmy, the dairy guy said this is his last delivery unless the last two invoices get paid. I lied and told him we'd get on it and that you were just strapped with some personal issues." He threw his hands up, "I didn't know what else to say! We need to pay those invoices, and for the meat delivery too or I'm going to be left with nothing but lettuce."

"I know, I know," he replied impatiently. "I'll do it right now," he lied having only thing on his mind and that was attainable cash.

He went in his office, closed the door and locked it. He went straight for the safe and knelt down on one knee as he began to enter the combination with trembling fingers.

"Shit!" he grumbled, pulling on the handle that wouldn't open. "Ok," he whispered, "just relax. Slow down and get it right and get the fuck out of here."

The second attempt worked and he reached over to the garbage can by his desk and turned it upside down, emptying out the contents and then pulled out the white, plastic bag that lined it and began shoving cash and some of the stolen diamonds into it.

Steve came in through the front entrance and flashed his badge to the doorman without waiting for a response.

"Where's Jimmy?" he asked as he passed him.

"What? He's not here," he replied, eyeing the odd display of a cop in a T-shirt and shorts as if he'd just come from the beach, but with the badge and the gun on his hip, he didn't argue. "I haven't seen him."

Steve turned on his heel.

"His truck is out back so don't fucking lie to me!"

The doorman raised his hands in defense, "Ok, I believe you but he's probably in his office and came in the back way."

Steve went for the employees only door, making his way across the bar and past several tables occupied by groups of men more interested in the naked girl on stage than him.

The doorman on the other hand made a quick exit out the front door Steve had entered, knowing full well if there were one cop, there would be many. He didn't want to be involved with what was about to go down.

Jimmy snorted the last line that was laid out on his desk from the small bag that had been in the safe. He threw his head back and sniffed, wiping his nose as the delightful feeling hit him and his throat felt the familiar numbness.

He tucked the small caliber gun that had also been in the safe into his pants behind his back and grabbed the garbage bag full of cash and diamonds, heading to the door, deciding to visit the registers next. They'd have at least a grand he thought greedily.

He opened the door and saw two female employees walk past; one a dancer wrapped in a robe about to go on stage and the other a topless waitress.

"Oh, hey Jimmy," the waitress said as she passed them.

He ignored her and started down the hall behind them, heading toward the door to the main part of bar when it opened and a man came through. At first he assumed it was just a drunk patron looking for the restrooms, until he recognized the individual as the same man he'd been spying on only hours earlier. He didn't have to think about why Steve was there, he knew.

Steve looked in one direction and saw the kitchen and then looked in the other and saw two women coming toward him, neither of them surprised to see him as one began to scold him.

"Hey! You can't come back here! Employees…"

The rest of her sentence was interrupted as Steve shoved her out of the way and she fell into the other girl, both of them hitting the wall as one stumbled in her high heels and went down, both of them screaming out for help but not realizing the gun that was pointing in their direction from down the hall.

A shot rang out and Steve felt a sharp pain in his upper left shoulder, knowing he'd been hit, hearing another one graze by his head and hit the back wall. He aimed his gun low, focusing on Jimmy's knee when one of the women screamed and bumped into him as she tried to crawl away from the gunfire.

Jimmy had his finger on the trigger for a third attempt when his head flew back and his eyes came open in shock as the bullet from Steve's gun entered his neck.

He fell back against the wall as he struggled to breathe, dropping the gun in his hand while the other went over the wound, feeling the warm liquid seeping through his fingers. He sank to the floor staring up at the ceiling, gasping when the face of Steve came into his line of sight.

"Jimmy!" he said, holding his head. "Where's Nikki?! Where's Nikki?!" But the frightened eyes of a dying man was the only response Steve got.

"Don't fucking die on me!" Steve shook him as he shouted. "Where is she?! Where did you take her?!"

He cringed over a sudden wave of pain coming from his left shoulder as he fell forward bracing his right hand on the floor.

"Tell me Jimmy," he whimpered, trying to fight off the nausea and lightheadedness that was engulfing him.

Blood from the shoulder wound was now seeping through his T-shirt and dripping on the floor by his hand. He began to see dark spots before his eyes, trying to shake it off, knowing he needed to stay awake despite the gunshot in order to find Nikki, but his body succumbed to the painful wound as he collapsed in the hall next to Jimmy's lifeless body.


	15. Chapter 15

_**Author Note: I'm so so sorry for the long delay getting out this final chapter. Life has been crazy lately! I already have a plot for a new story so stay tuned in the next couple of months. Thanks again for hanging in there and above all, thanks for reading! Aloha! **_

**Chapter Fifteen**

Danny flew into the parking lot of Queen's hospital and went straight for the ER entrance, throwing the Camaro in park as the tires slid on the pavement. The siren was silenced but the blue police lights still flickered in the grill of the car.

He swung the driver's side door open so swiftly as he exited the vehicle that the momentum from it swung it closed again.

He ran into the ER and up to the first person with a nametag on.

"McGarrett!" he said almost breathless. "Steven McGarrett! He was brought in by ambulance. A gun shot." It was the only information he had at the moment feeling his heart racing and his patience reaching a climatic end, sensing a temper tantrum soon if he didn't get an answer to his question from the hospital orderly that just stared at him.

"Hello!" he shouted to her. "Commander Steven McGarrett! He's a police officer that was shot and brought here! Where is he?"

"Sir!" A woman from behind a podium motioned to him. "He's in with the doctor."

He ignored the gawking nurse and went for the one that had spoken up. "I'm his partner. Buzz me in." He didn't wait for an answer from her and went straight for the double doors, hearing the latch being unclicked in lieu of a hospital badge.

He heard her call out bed number 'eleven' as he entered through the doors.

He went down the hall that was lined with beds on either side, some had the glass doors closed as well as the curtain, hiding the occupants while others were wide open exposing the patient or an empty bed. He had no interest in any of them except for the labeled bed numbers that directed him in the right path towards Steve.

He finally came to room eleven, stopping at the entrance as his stomach lurched and his heart dropped into it. The room was empty, but the remnants of Steve being there was apparent, seeing the cutaway T-shirt he'd had on at the beach that was covered in blood lying on the floor. The bed had bloodstains on it as well and there were opened bags of gauze and medical supplies littering the room.

"Excuse me," a voice behind him said, pulling him out of the trance that had his mind reeling over the negative prospects of his friend's condition. "Are you looking for Officer McGarrett?"

"Yes! Is he…" Danny spoke, barely able to get the words out and not able to finish the question that had him practically paralyzed with fear.

She quickly snuffed out the fright that was engulfing him. "He's going to be fine. They took him upstairs to the fourth floor. The gunshot was to his upper left shoulder and went clean through."

Danny let out the breath he didn't even realize he'd been holding and smiled, "Thank you. Fourth floor you said?"

She smiled back, "Yes," pointing toward the elevators. "When you come out of the elevator go left and about a fifty feet down you'll find a nurses station. They can help you."

"Thank you," he replied ever so sincerely.

…..

Danny walked down the fourth floor hall and glanced up at the small white board on the outside of the room he'd been instructed to, seeing Steve's name on it. He went inside the open door and saw him on a hospital bed in a sitting position. His head was turned to the side and his eyes were closed. He had a white bandage wrapped around his left shoulder and chest as two nurses tended to him.

Danny didn't ask for permission to enter as he came in the room and up to the bed, "Is he alright?" he asked the two women.

"He's really lucky," one of them spoke up. "It went clean through. The doctor was just in and said he wouldn't need surgery." She walked by him and smiled. "He's really lucky."

Danny nodded his understanding, his focus on the person in the bed.

"He's pretty out of it right now, might be for some time," the other nurse said as she taped a tube to Steve's left arm that was feeding him a solution from a bag that was hanging on a pole next to the bed.

Danny noticed just then the IV and the traces of blood that were on his hand and forearm from the incident. 'Lucky,' he questioned, never liking that word when it came to his line of work. Lucky was when you didn't get shot at all.

He walked over to the bed after the nurse left and stood next to it shaking his head at his partner, wanting to physically shake him for coming so close to getting killed.

He shouldn't have let him leave the North Shore alone, feeling a wave of guilt over that now, but he knew it was useless to try and convince Steve otherwise. When he got that way it was impossible to talk to him, little did he know he was going to witness a repeat scenario.

…

Danny heard a slight moan and stood up, putting his hand on the railing of Steve's bed as he slowly turned his head, looking over at him with droopy eyes.

"Hey," Danny said to him. "How do you feel?"

Steve narrowed his eyes, looking past him now and getting a recollection of where he was. It all came flooding back in the blink of an eye as his flew open wide.

"Nikki!" he said in a panic. "How long have I been out?!"

Danny shrugged, "I don't know, a couple of hours."

"Did you find her yet?!"

He shook his head, "No, but Chin and Kono are searching Ketchum's apartment as we speak."

Steve reached down and whipped the blankets off his body with his good arm and then cringed over the effect it had on his bad shoulder.

"Where the hell do you think you're doing?" Danny blasted him as he blocked the edge of the bed with his body as Steve tried to swing his left leg off of it.

"Get out of my way, Danny," he threatened.

"Lay down!"

"I'm serious! Move!" he shouted when it was apparent he wasn't going to make way for him.

Danny stepped back and threw up both of his hands, "What are you going to do with a wounded shoulder? You going to start busting down doors?"

"It was my fault," Steve said as he stood up and wobbled, bracing his good hand on the bed until he was stable. "I killed him before he could tell me where she was. I have to find her."

"Let us handle it."

Danny reached out for his arm as he pulled it away, "I'm not staying here while she's out there, god knows where."

"Steve…" he began to argue when he was interrupted.

"I can't!" Steve shouted back, and then his voice calmed to more of a pleading tone than argumentative. "I can't Danny. I can't stay here while she's still missing. I have to find her." He looked at him hopeful. "Help me, but don't stand in my way."

Danny saw not only the pleading but knew the determination of his partner. He didn't even know why he was taking the time to think it over, he was going to let him go and he was also going to help him. The conditions weren't ideal but nonetheless, they were partners and he wouldn't let him out of his sight again like he had several hours later at the north shore.

"Fine," he grumbled, "but you're not driving!" he added with a small grin as he turned away, seeing the same on Steve's face.

….

Nikki whimpered softly, having no energy to call out anymore or even attempt to fight off another injection. Her body was drenched in sweat and dangerously close to dehydration as she lay in the box.

Every muscle in her body ached from the tension that the drug caused. Her determination to try and fight it every step of the way had been a tremendous struggle, but after his third dose she felt helpless and now that it was wearing off she could feel her body's need for another dose just to ease it down from the physical pain and the mental fear.

She mumbled a name but it wasn't the one she had begged to find her, but the one she pleaded to come back and relieve her of this agony.

"Jimmy," she whispered hoarsely. "Come back."

Thinking of Steve now only made her feel guilty and brought on a whole new set of pain. She should have fought harder when Jimmy took her. She should have fought harder when he gave her the first shot. The mental and emotional feelings that the drug brought on were like stepping back in time five years. She loved it and she hated it all at the same time. Her mind began to unreasonably explain to her why he wasn't there and why he wouldn't come for her. She was tainted once again with heroine. Whether it was her fault or not she couldn't decipher, but it didn't matter, Steve would see her as tainted once again.

The hours ticked by as she drifted in and out of consciousness, loosing all sense of time and hope in the darkness, hoping the end came soon.

….

"Well that was unpleasant," Danny huffed as they exited the hospital together, speaking of Steve's demand of an early release.

"They're just doing their job," he replied.

"You're other arm is going to be out of commission with all the forms you had to sign, and did you see the look on that nurses' face when she was wrapping up your shoulder? She was a little disgusted with you."

"They don't understand the urgency," he stopped at the Camaro and looked across at Danny before he got in the driver's side. "Take me to the office."

He nodded his response as they both got in, Steve moving slower and with a painful expression as he slid into the passenger side seat.

Danny saw it but refused to comment on it, what was the point, there was no way in hell he was going to talk him in to going back inside the hospital, at least not until Nikki was found.

"Kono had Ketchum's apartment swept for fingerprints," Danny explained as he pulled out of the parking lot. "They didn't find Nikki's. He must not have brought her there."

"He wouldn't bring her to the club," Steve added, "too many eyes. He has to have a stash house somewhere and I bet you Jimmy's not the only one that knows where that place is," he growled, thinking of their suspect already in custody.

Danny glanced over at him, reading his mind and seeing the anger rise up on his face, glad that he was semi restricted with the shoulder wound, otherwise Jason Mahmood would be the one in a world of hurt.

….

"Steve!" Danny shouted at him. "Get off him!" he pulled on his right hand, trying to get him to release the hold on Jason's throat.

"Where is she?" he growled through gritted teeth as he squeezed harder. "Give me an address of where he would take her?" Jason's face was bright red as he fought to breathe through the tight hold on his throat.

"Let him go!" Danny shouted again, hitting him on the left wounded shoulder, knowing it would bring him out of the unwavering trance that had him close to killing Jason.

Steve cringed at the sudden wave of pain and did let go, falling to the side in the interrogation room as Jason rolled away form him, still handcuffed, coughing and wheezing trying desperately to get his breath back.

"Goddamnit Danny!" Steve groaned, holding his left shoulder.

"You were going to kill him!"

Steve looked over at Jason as he lay on the floor still gasping for air. "He knows something," he grunted, making his way back over to him.

"I don't know anything about no girl or no kidnapping!" he said hoarsely. "I swear to God!" He used his feet, scooting across the floor trying to get away from Steve. "Get him away from me!" he pleaded with Danny.

Danny stepped in the path between the two men. "I believe him Steve! Back off!"  
He stopped moving toward him only because he was exhausted and in pain. "If I find out you had anything to do with her disappearance…" Steve warned Jason, "I'll kill you."

"I swear I don't know where she is!" he wheezed; still reeling from the attack and the fact that Jimmy was dead, wondering where that left him.

Danny bent over and grabbed Steve's right arm and helped him off the ground. "You need to calm down or you're going to end up in the hospital again with a head injury, from me!" he shouted at him as he stood up.

He staggered slightly, "Where would he take her?" he asked Danny, his voice stressing his concern over her lengthy disappearance. "God, what if she's confined somewhere and can't move or is running out of oxygen?!"

Danny put his hands up, "You have to calm down. We'll find her. We will."

"How?! The only lead we had I shot in the neck! He could have taken her anywhere! To an abandoned building or out in the forest somewhere! We have no leads!"

"Steve…" Danny began, knowing he was right, starting to feel the panic jump across at him until Jason spoke up.

"Hey, hold on a second," he coughed, sitting up with his hands still bound, "Jimmy's grandpa has a place that's kinda remote." He took in a deep breath and coughed again before continuing on. "They put him in an old folks home. He doesn't live there anymore, no one does. Jimmy's relatives from the mainland are fighting over the property. Maybe…" he shrugged, "maybe he took her there."

The news of that sent a jolt of renewed passion through Steve. "Where?! Where is it?"

With Jimmy dead, Jason felt this might be an opportunity for him in this critical situation.

"If I tell you, will you drop the charges on me?" The second it came out of his mouth he felt he'd made a crucial error, seeing the look that came over Steve's face.

"How about this," he replied coldly. "You tell me where that house is and I won't charge you with obstruction of justice, or attempted murder when I find her alive, or first degree murder if I don't?"

Jimmy felt as if all the blood had drained from his body over the threat that he believed held every bit of merit that it was supposed to. "It's somewhere off of Kamehameha Hwy, over by Dole," he quickly confessed. "That's all I know. I swear to god on my life!" he felt another attack that he just wanted to avoid at all costs, not sure his partner would get him off this time. "I swear!"

…

Steve sat on the passenger seat of the parked Camaro with his feet on the ground and his phone in his right hand, staring out at a pineapple field just past the Dole Plantation, waiting for Chin's call with the address of Jimmy's grandfather's house.

Danny paced back and forth in front of him, eagerly awaiting the same information.

"I'm in love with her," Steve blurted out, glancing up at Danny. "I mean I do. I love her."

Danny stopped and looked down at him, seeing a slight bloodstain on the bandage over his shoulder, knowing he was in pain but never showed a single sign that it even bothered him. "I know," he replied, nodding his head, "I know you are. We'll find her."

Steve's phone buzzed in his hand just then. "Chin!" he said anxiously, putting him on speaker. "Did you find it?"

He rattled off the address to them as Steve shifted his body back into the car and Danny jumped back into the driver's seat.

"I'll contact the local police to meet you out there," Chin said. "Kono and I are on our way. I have a good feeling, Steve," he said to him, "she's there."

"I hope so. Good work Chin. Thank you."

"You got it brother. We're on our way."

"Hit it," he said to Danny, feeling his body push back into the seat seconds later and the gravel beneath the tires of the car spit out behind it as they took off in the direction of Jimmy Ketchum's grandfather's house.

….

Nikki felt at the moment that it could not get any worse. Her body ached with pain from being enclosed in the box, along with the lack of water and food and the heat. She lay still because it was useless to try and move. There were no comfortable positions so what was the point. The less she struggled the less pain she felt. She had no fight left in her and the fear that this wooden box was going to become her coffin was becoming more of a reality with every hour that slowly ticked by.

She closed her eyes and tried to picture something beautiful, not wanting her last thought in this life to be something fearful.

She concentrated on Waimea beach from when she was a little girl, playing there with Stuart and her father. She remembered being in the water and him tossing she and her brother up in the air as they all laughed. She felt a wave of happiness wash over her with the joy of knowing that she would soon be with them both again. It was a comforting feeling that sustained her for a few minutes until another pain rippled through her body, bringing her right back into the nightmare that seemed to have no end.

"Stuart," she whispered hoarsely, "help me."

She heard her name just then, lifting her head just slightly and looking around in the darkness assured that it was he, calling for her. '_Maybe this is it_,' she thought wearily, maybe she was dying right then and there. But when she heard the voice again, it was louder and more demanding, not like Stuart's at all.

"Nikki!" Steve shouted as he made his way through the empty house, room by room, shouting her name in hopes of hearing a reply.

"Nikki!" Danny called out going in the opposite direction of the house and to the old garage that was across the yard. He pulled on the flimsy doors that wobbled as he opened them. The inside was cluttered with abandoned furniture from the house that had layers of dust on them. The walls held racks and racks of tools that were meticulously in order, knowing at one time it was a well-kept place. There was a long, wooden crate that looked like it was used for some type of storage and as he moved closer to it, he noticed several power tools and other items scattered around it as if someone had emptied it to use the box for something else.

"Nikki?" he said as he bent down on one knee before it, holding the paddle lock in his hand, seeing that it was locked.

She heard her name again only the voice was so close she felt as if it were right behind her.

"Stuart?" she said out loud in a soft muffled voice.

Danny pulled on the lock as hard as he could, "Nikki?! I'm here sweetheart! It's Danny. I'll get you out!"

He stood up and ran over to the shelf and grabbed a hammer and pry, yelling out for Steve as he did.

"Steve! I found her! In the garage! Steve!"

He ran back over and slid down on his knees before the crate and dug the pry between two boards next to one of the hinges and used the hammer to jam it in further.

"Hang on Nikki," he said as he stood up, gripping the handle as he lifted up trying to separate the wood from the hinge. It loosened it some as he pulled it out, moving down the crate to the other on, repeating the same method as Steve appeared at the door.

"Nikki?!" he panted, the pain in his shoulder throbbing from quickly descending the stairs of the house and running across the yard after hearing Danny calling out that he had found her. The pain was put aside as he saw the efforts of his partner and knew without having to ask that she was in the box.

He ran over to him just as he pried the second hinge loose, lifting the top just enough for Steve to get his fingers under the other side as they both lifted and flipped the top over.

Nikki felt the fresh, cool air sweep down her body and it was the most delightful feeling she'd ever felt until the feel of her body being lifted out and then looking up and seeing Steve as Danny set her on the ground and he held her with his right arm.

"Its ok now," his voice choked out the words of relief as he pulled her in closer, kissing her cheek and then forehead.

"I'm going to get some water," Danny said, running out of the barn to the house.

"Nikki," Steve said to her, "can you hear me? It's ok now. I'm here."

She forced a smile through her dry, cracked lips and nodded to his response.

He pulled her closer once again and just hugged her, feeling as if his heart might explode he was so grateful to be free of the nightmare of not knowing if he would ever be able to hold her again.

…

Steve turned his head and looked over at Nikki as she slept soundly in the hospital bed next to his. They were granted a private room since the patient occupancy was currently at a low status and also their doctors didn't want Steve getting up and going to her room, and knew this would keep him at bay.

Her color was back and she was looking like herself again after almost twenty-four hours hooked up to an IV feeding her fluids. It was hard to listen to her as she talked about her experience being held in the box, especially the part about the heroine injections. It frightened him that she might relapse into that life again, but she showed no signs of it and assured him and everyone else that she still held no desire for it. The frightening ordeal had cured her of that. He was proud of her in that aspect as well as being able to just survive the ordeal all together. She was strong and willful; above all the rest, he loved that most about her.

She opened her eyes as if feeling his presence and smiled back at him.

"How you feeling?" he asked her.

"Wonderful now," she replied. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I won the lottery," he grinned.

Nikki blushed slightly and reached her hand out to him. He did the same as they touched fingers.

"Thank you for rescuing me?"

"Thank you for having the strength to hold on until I got there. I'm sorry it wasn't sooner." He glanced down at the fresh bandage around his shoulder. "I had a little setback."

"You're forgiven," she chuckled.

He reached out further so he could grasp her hand. "You scared me."

She heard it in his voice even though it was over now. "You almost died for me. Don't do that again."

"I can't help that," he grinned. "I love you."

Tears instantly welled up in her eyes over his tender reply.

"I love you too." She gripped his hand tighter. "So where do we go from here?"

"Where do you want to go?" he asked.

"I want to go where you go. I want to sleep where you sleep. I want to be with you, always."

He let go of her hand and flipped the covers off his body and rolled off the bed wearing the traditional blue hospital gown, the same as she. He went to her bed as she happily scooted over, allowing him to slide in next to her.

"Be careful of your shoulder," she scolded and then giggled.

He put his right arm around her, as she laid close to him in the confines of the small space careful not to hurt him.

"How's this for starters on our new adventure?"

"I like it," Nikki smiled.

"I think our next adventure needs to involve placing a rock right here." He lifted up her left hand and kissed it.

"I like that even more," Nikki sighed, forgetting all about her previous encounter. She was safe now and knew she always would be.

_The End_


End file.
